I opened my wallet and gave him a coupon, hoping he’d open his wallet and give me money.
My favorite tree is the Joshua tree, which is named after me. Well, it will be, once I change my name to Joshua.
On the card I wrote, “Thinking of you,” and the picture was of my erect penis. I hope my local congressman got it OK.
In my dream, the passenger seat of my car was a toilet. I guess I was on my way to pick up a politician.
There’s a faint whiff of feces wafting up my nostrils. But that’s natural, because I just walked past a politician.
Some wise guys came by my business establishment and tried to offer me neighborhood protection. They weren’t mafia, but they were wearing togas.
When you pay for security, it seems like you’re paying for nothing—and that’s the point. You’re paying so nothing happens. Safety is the absence of something.
I’m into older women, because all women are older women. Every second the woman you love is an older woman.
My reputation precedes me. It shows up about fifteen minutes before I do, eats, and then leaves without paying or tipping.
The locked door in my house is just a diversion. The real valuable items are out in the open, where they are hidden from the unimaginative.
That lady has a piano. It’s nice, but it’s not the running of rivers Or the murmuring trees make .. Who needs a piano? It’s better to have ears And love Nature.
I tend to write on an acoustic guitar or the piano. I have kind of a rule: if I can't sit down and play this and get the song over, I don't take it to the band, because most any good song, you can sit down and deliver it with a piano or a guitar.
Well I like everything but my first love has always been piano because when I started out there was a piano in my house and it was there so I just started tinkling on it really so it's always been my first love.
My mother adores singing and plays piano. My uncle was a phenomenal pianist. My brother John is a double bassist. I used to play the piano, badly, and cello. My brother Peter played violin.
I grew up with a piano, and my aunt taught me chords. I played with bands in high school and I could do like, C chord, G chord, D chord; really simple, rhythm piano.
When I was at school, I wanted to play a piano, and they said, 'No, that's for the classical students.' There's always been this air around pianos, which can very often discourage a young person from having a go.
Will: Do you play the piano? Skylar: A bit. Will: Okay, when you look at a piano you see Mozart, right? Skylar: I see "Chopsticks."
I first started playing in piano bars for three reasons - to make money, to be in the company of my friends - and also to hook up with young girls. I always knew, even before I played in piano bars, about the effect of my voice.
Here in New Orleans, what a lot of the musical families do - and this is a romantic concept on my part - is they teach their kids to tap dance first. Then after tap dance, you learn piano, and after piano, you get to pick between all the instruments ...
I play only classical music. My pianos are my only big indulgence, but they're a necessity. When I'm playing the piano is literally the only time I can be completely abstract and disconnected from the regular world and yet be connected - to my music.
I was half asleep lying there writing this lyric in my head at about 3:30 in the morning. I woke Steve up with this idea and then we went into the living room where there was a little upright piano and finished the song. I wonder where that piano is ...
