Jeannie: [over the house intercom, as Principal Rooney is standing at the kitchen sink] Excuse me: if whoever was in this house is still in the house, I'd like you to know that I've just called the police. I'd also like to add that I've got my father...
Eva: I don't even know how this war started. It's just two sides that tripped each other way back. Who cares about the history behind it? I am my father's daughter, and when they call me to testify, I will protect my own, no matter what.
Tommy DeVito: Just don't go busting my balls, Billy, okay? Billy Batts: Hey, Tommy, if I was gonna break your balls, I'd tell you to go home and get your shine box. [to his friends] Billy Batts: Now this kid, this kid was great. They, they used to ca...
Bartlett: [of the Americans' vodka] In the three years, seven months and two weeks that I've been in the bag, that's the most extraordinary stuff I've ever tasted. It's shattering! MacDonald: Well, I think it's rather good... Well, with your permissi...
Abernathy: Hello sir! What's your name? Jasper: Jasper. Abernathy: Hello Jasper, I'm Abernathy. Jasper: Aber- what? Abernathy: Abernathy. Jasper: But what's your first name? Abernathy: That is my first name. Jasper: What kind of first name is that? A...
Ghost Dog: It is bad when one thing becomes two. One should not look for anything else in the Way of the Samurai. It is the same for anything that is called a Way. If one understands things in this manner, he should be able to hear about all ways and...
[first title card] Title card: There was a land of Cavaliers and Cotton Fields called the Old South... Here in this pretty world Gallantry took its last bow... Here was the last ever to be seen of Knights and their Ladies Fair, of Master and of Slave...
Hermione: Harry, Harry! Shrunken head 1: I say! No underage wizards allowed in today. [shouts] Shrunken head 1: Shut the damn door! Hermione: So rude! Ron: Thick-heads. Shrunken head 2: Thick-heads... how dare they. Who are they calling Thick-heads? ...
Elwood P. Dowd: Years ago my mother used to say to me, she'd say, "In this world, Elwood, you must be" - she always called me Elwood - "In this world, Elwood, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant." Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasa...
[first lines] Freaky Mammal: Well, why don't they call it The Big Chill? Or The Nippy Era? I'm just sayin', how do we know it's an Ice Age? Freaky Mammal: [irritably] Because... of all... [shouts] Freaky Mammal: ...the *ice*! Freaky Mammal: Well, thi...
Mary Hatch: [trapped naked in a bush] Shame on you! I'll tell your mother! George Bailey: [thoughtfully] My mother's way up on the corner there. Mary Hatch: I'll call the police. George Bailey: They're way downtown. Anyway, they'd be on my side. Mary...
Helen: I'm calling to celebrate a momentous occasion. We are now *officially* moved in. Bob: That's great, honey. And the last three years don't count because... Helen: Because I finally unpacked the last box. Now it's official! Ha ha ha! Why do we h...
Debbie: The subheading reads, 'Brown and Williamson has a 500 page dossier attacking chief critic.' It quotes Richard Scruggs calling it, 'the worse kind of an organized smear campaign against a Whistleblower'. 'A closer look at the file and independ...
Perry: Go. Sleep badly. Any questions, hesitate to call. Harry: Bad. Perry: Excuse me? Harry: Sleep bad. Otherwise it makes it seem like the mechanism that allows you to sleep... Perry: What, fuckhead? Who taught you grammar? Badly's an adverb. Get o...
Harry: Oh Wow. Woo. It's tiny. Is this real? Perry: Yeah, it's a Derringer. It's loaded. I call it my faggot gun. Harry: Because... Perry: Because its only good for a couple shots, then you gotta drop it for something better. You asked, Chief.
Didymus: [finally entering the castle] Well, come on then! Sarah: No! I have to face him alone. Didymus: But why? Sarah: Because that's the way it's done! Didymus: Well, if that is the way it is done, then that is the way you must do it. But, should ...
[watching British play Cricket so they can learn, and they see the Umpire stick his finger up] Tipu: Why is he pointing up? Bhuvan: That's what I'M trying to understand. Guran: Maybe he's calling for his Ma. She's sitting up there, eh? [Laughing]
Yuri Orlov: Every faction in Africa calls themselves by these noble names - Liberation this, Patriotic that, Democratic Republic of something-or-other... I guess they can't own up to what they usually are: the Federation of Worse Oppressors Than the ...
The Bullet Farmer: Come on! I've been called to the torture! Immortan Joe: Patience! The Bullet Farmer: Oh, you stay here with your grief, daddy. I'll fetch 'em for ya. The People Eater: Be careful! Protect the assets! The Bullet Farmer: Just one ang...
Eve Kendall: While I'm calling, you can change your clothes. Roger Thornhill: Where do you propose I do that? In Marshall Fields' window? Eve Kendall: I sort of had the men's room in mind. Roger Thornhill: Did you, now? You're the smartest girl I eve...
Ralph: This is dark chocolate. It comes all the way from Switzerland, Europe. That's near France, see. They call it 'bitter sweet.' Melts in your mouth. Boss Spearman: You tried it? Ralph: No. Boss Spearman: How do you know it melts in your mouth? Ra...
