Teddy: [looking around Hamilton's study] Such a beautiful room, it's hard to imagine a man's scream from here. Ever seen fingernails ripped out with a rusty pliers, Sir John, hmm? All your learning, and you still don't understand. Sir John Hamilton: ...
SS-Sturmbannführer Von Hapen: [Von Hapen surprised Smith and Schaffer] Stay where you are! I advise everyone to be perfectly still. Drop your gun, Major. You too, Lieutenant. By the fireplace. SS-Standartenführer Kramer: Thank God you're here, Majo...
[Monty's cat jumps onto the sofa] Uncle Monty: Get that damned little swine out of here! [he lunges at it and it runs off] Uncle Monty: It's trying to get itself in with you, it's trying for even more advantage! It's obsessed with its gut, it's like ...
Uncle Monty: You shouldn't treat each other so badly. This boy's been out there frozen to the marrow and you just sit in here drinking. Now, come along, he's going to revitalise himself and you're going to finish the vegetables. Withnail: I don't kno...
Bryan Callen: Tommy Riordan's captured the media's attention, but the question still remains: who is this guy? And more importantly, can he compete in this talent pool? Can he win? Sam Sheridan: I wish I knew, Bryan. I wish I knew who he was, and I'v...
Moppet Girl: [trying to play "Fix-It Felix, Jr."] Mr. Litwak! Mr. Litwak: What's the matter, sweetheart? Moppet Girl: The game's busted. Mr. Litwak: [looks] Hmm, looks like the game's gone cuckoo... like my nana. Here's your quarter back, darling. Mo...
Eddie Valiant: Anybody know you're here? Roger Rabbit: Nobody. Not a soul, except, uh... Eddie Valiant: Who? Roger Rabbit: Well, you see, I didn't know where your office was. So I asked the newsboy. He didn't know. So I asked the fireman, the green g...
Sally Albright: At least I got the apartment. Harry Burns: That's what everyone says. But, really, what's so hard about finding an apartment? What you do is look in the obituary section. You see who died, find out where they lived, and tip the doorma...
Bud Fox: Hi, Marv. Marv: [sarcastically] Oh, hi. Say, why don't YOU get the hell out of MY office! Bud Fox: I know I've been a bit of a schmuck lately and I just want to apologize. Marv: You've been a *real* schmuck lately. So go thou and sin no more...
Erik Lehnsherr: A man from the future came to me. Raven: Don't lie to me! Erik Lehnsherr: I never have, and I never will! He said the humans would take your blood and use it as a weapon against us, to wipe us all out! Raven: In that case, how'd you l...
Juror #10: Oh, listen, I don't see what all this stuff about the knife has got to do with anything. Somebody saw the kid stab his father, what more do we need? You guys can talk the ears right off my head, you know what I mean? I got three garages of...
Xerxes: There will be no glory in your sacrifice. I will erase even the memory of Sparta from the histories! Every piece of Greek parchment shall be burned. Every Greek historian, and every scribe shall have their eyes pulled out, and their tongues c...
McKenzie: Hey, don't you have like 20 cards to write by Friday? Tom: Nope, all done. McKenzie: Really? Well, could you help me with mine? Because I'm running out of ways to say "Congratulations". So far, I've got: "Congrats", "Good job" and "Well don...
Jeffrey Lovell: Dad, did you know the astronauts in the fire? Jim Lovell: [pause] Yeah, I knew them. Knew all of them. Jeffrey Lovell: Could that happen again? Jim Lovell: Well, I'll tell you something about that fire, a lot of things went wrong. The...
Jerry Bostick - FIDO White: Looks like Mrs. Kranz pulled out the ol' needle and thread again... Technician: Last one looked like he bought it off a gypsy. Jerry Bostick - FIDO White: Well I guess you can't argue with tradition. Technician: [Gene puts...
Lindsey Brigman: [relaying what Bud types] Have some new friends down here. Guess they've been here awhile. They've left us alone, but it bothers them to see us hurting each other. Getting out of hand. They sent a message. Hope you got it. Catfish De...
Margo Channing: Margo Channing is ageless - spoken like a press agent. Lloyd Richards: I know what I'm talking about. After all, they're my plays. Margo Channing: Spoken like an author. Lloyd, I'm not twenty-ish, I'm not thirty-ish. Three months ago ...
Frank Lucas: They tried to kill my Wife! Frank Lucas: Who are they?... Huh?... Maybe it was one of your people? Dominic Cattano: I don't know yet. Frank Lucas: You don't know. Dominic Cattano: No. Frank Lucas: You don't know. Frank Lucas: I tell you ...
[Alvy addresses a pair of strangers on the street] Alvy Singer: Here, you look like a very happy couple, um, are you? Female street stranger: Yeah. Alvy Singer: Yeah? So, so, how do you account for it? Female street stranger: Uh, I'm very shallow and...
Marcy: I was raped once. As a matter of fact it happened right here in this very room. I lived here once. He came in through there on the fire escape. He held a knife to my throat and said if I made a move, he'd cut my tongue out. He tied me to the b...
Francis de Marais: Why don't you Americans learn from us - from our mistakes? Mon Dieux! With your Army, your strength, your power, you could win if you want to! You can win! Hubert de Marais: The Vietnamese... we worked with them, made something - s...
