Nicky Santoro: [to Ace] Get this through your head you Jew motherfucker, you! You only exist out here because of me! That's the only reason! Without *me*, you, personally, every fuckin' wise guy skell around'll take a piece of your fuckin' Jew ass! T...
Nicky Santoro: Oh I don't know whether you know this or not, but you only have your fuckin casino because I made that possible. I'm what counts out here, not your fuckin country clubs or your fuckin TV shows! And what the fuck are you doing on TV any...
Mother: All right. Now, are you ready to tell me where you heard that word? Ralphie as Adult: [narrating] Now, I had heard that word at least ten times a day from my old man. He worked in profanity the way other artists might work in oils or clay. It...
David Kleinfeld: Fuck you and your self-righteous code of the goddamn streets. Did it pull you out of a 30 year stint in only 5 years? No, it didn't, I did. Did it get you acquitted 4 fucking times? No, it didn't, I did, so fuck you, fuck the streets...
[Werner takes pictures of the watch officers on the conning tower] Captain: Take pictures of the crew returning, not putting out to sea. Lt. Werner: Why? Captain: They'll have grown beards by then. It would shame the Tommies to see mere boys give the...
Dr. Schreber: Listen to me, John. You have their power. You can make things happen by will alone. They call it "Tuning." That is how they make the buildings change. Just now you acted out of self-defense, a reflex. But I can teach you to control your...
Dawson: Not bad for a little freshman but you gotta watch out for older girls Melvin Spivey: Hey. Come here. We just wanna know something. You gonna be fucking that tonight, or are you gonna be a little wimp? Mitch: [laughs] How do you know I haven't...
Peter: Somebody better sit watch all the time. Roger: [points to the boarded up door] They'll never get through there. Peter: Enough of them will. And it's not just those things we have to worry about. That chopper up there could give us away if some...
Col. Everett Dasher Breed: Reisman! Some people may consider you a first-class officer. But as far as I'm concerned, you're a disorganized, undisciplined clown. I'm gonna' make it my business to run you out of this Army. Major John Reisman: I owe you...
Hoke Colburn: Hey, there, Oscar, Junior... how you boys doin' this morning? Oscar: How the old lady treatin' you, Hoke? Hoke Colburn: Lord, I tell you one thing... she sho' do know how to throw a fit! [Hoke, Oscar, and Junior break out in laughter] D...
Boolie Werthan: [Boolie is eating lunch at Daisy's, trying to convince her that she can't drive anymore after her accident] Mama. Daisy Werthan: No. Boolie Werthan: Mama! Daisy Werthan: No! Boolie Werthan: You know, it's a miracle you're not laying u...
Gambol: [to The Joker] Give me one reason why I shouldn't have my boy here pull your head off. The Joker: How about a magic trick? [pulls out a pencil and sticks it upright into the table] The Joker: I'm gonna make this pencil disappear. [Gambol's th...
The Joker: I had a vision, of a world without Batman. The mob ground out a little profit and the police tried to shut them down, one block at a time. And it was so... boring. I've had a change of heart. I don't want Mr. Reese spoiling everything, but...
The Joker: If we don't deal with this now, soon little, uh, Gambol here won't be able to get a nickel for his grandma. Gambol: [explodes] Enough from the clown! [He rises to his feet; Joker does too, opening his coat to reveal a cluster of grenades, ...
[Batman has just fought off Scarecrow and a group of Batman wannabes] Batman: Don't let me find you out here again. Brian: We're trying to help you! Batman: I don't need help. Dr. Jonathan Crane: Not my diagnosis! Brian: What gives you the right? Wha...
[while Grumpy overpowers two of the tellers in the bank, Happy and Dopey wait for the silent alarm to come] Dopey: Here comes the silent alarm... [disables it by pressing a button] Dopey: And there it goes. [pause] Dopey: That's funny, it didn't dial...
Happy: [after cracking open the bank's safe] They wired this thing up with, like, 5,000 volts. What kind of bank does that? Grumpy: A mob bank. I guess the Joker is as crazy as they say. Where's the alarm guy? Happy: Boss told me, when the guy was do...
C.A. Swan: Smart, aren't you? Tony Wendice: No, not really. I've just had time to think things out. Put myself in your position. That's why I know you're going to agree. C.A. Swan: What makes you think I'll agree? Tony Wendice: For the same reason th...
Bookie Harassed by French: I'm in the hole, I pay him two grand a week. There's no profit, I pay him two grand a week. Mr. French: Well make more fuckin' money. This is America. You don't make money, then you're a fuckin' douchebag. [pulls out gun] M...
Frank Costello: There is no need to remind you that if you don't find that cheese eating rat bastard in your department... it won't be me who suffers for it. Colin Sullivan: What I be any good at my job if I didn't fucking already know that? Frank Co...
[Two traders are getting their shoes shined] Trader #2: You can't short the stock because Bruce Wayne goes to a party. Trader #1: Wayne coming back is change. Change is either good or bad. I pick bad. Trader #2: On what basis? Trader #1: I flipped a ...
