Lead Singer Crucifee: [Dying on the cross] Cheer up, Brian. You know what they say: some things in life are bad. They can really make you mad. Other things just make you swear and curse. When you're chewing on life's gristle, don't grumble; give a wh...
Guard: Your Highness! Your Highness! Your Highness, the girl! The girl who ate the peach and forgot everything! Jareth: What of her? Guard: She, the monster, Sir Didymus, and the dwarf, they made it through the gate and they're on their way to the ca...
City Councilman: [told by Bud to leave Lynn's house] Maybe I will. Maybe I won't. Bud White: [flashes his badge] LAPD, shitbird. Get the fuck outta here or I'll call your wife to come get you! [while Lynn hides a smile, the client gathers up his clot...
Reginald Fleming 'R.J.' Johnston: The Emperor has been a prisoner in his own palace since the day that he was crowned, and has remained a prisoner since he abdicated. But now he's growing up, he may wonder why he's the only person in China who may no...
[in a drinking game] Gimli: It's the Dwarves that go swimming with little, hairy woman. [he burps] Legolas: I feel something. A slight tingle in my fingers. I think it's affecting me. Gimli: What did I say? He can't hold his liquor. [Gimli passes out...
Gandalf: [During the siege of Gondor] Peregrin Took! Go back to the Citadel! Pippin: [dazed] They called us out to fight. Gandalf: This is no place for a Hobbit! [He lays about him with his sword and staff; an Orc rushes up behind him and Pippin kill...
Zazu: [about Scar] There's one in every family sire. Two in mine, actually. And they always manage to ruin special occasions. Mufasa: What am I going to do with him? Zazu: He'd make a very handsome throw rug. Mufasa: [Surprised] Zazu! Zazu: And just ...
Cora Munro: Justice? If that's justice than the sooner French guns blow the English out of America the better it will be for the people here! Colonel Munro: You do not know what you're saying, girl! Cora Munro: Yes I do, I know exactly what what I'm ...
Sebastian: The newt play the flute / The carp play the harp / The plaice play the bass / And they soundin' sharp / The bass play the brass / The chub play the tub / The fluke is the duke of soul. Fluke: Yeah! Sebastian: The ray he can play / The ling...
Léon: Tony... All the money I make, that you keep for me... Tony: You need some money? Léon: No, just curious... Because, I've been working a long time... And I havent done anything with my... I thought maybe someday I could [uncomfortable] Léon: ...
Karen Clarke: Hey, listen, the war committee. What you have to do is you've got to look for the ten dullest-named committees happening out of the executive branch. Because Linton is not going to call it "The Big Horrible War Committee". He's gonna hi...
Aragorn: I swore to protect you. Frodo: Can you protect me from yourself? [holding out the Ring] Frodo: Would you destroy it? The Ring: [whispering] Aragorn... Elessar... Aragorn: [closing Frodo's hand around the Ring] I would have gone with you to t...
Gimli: It's true you don't see many Dwarf-women. And in fact, they are so alike in voice and appearance, that they are often mistaken for Dwarf-men. Aragorn: [whispering to Eowyn] It's the beards. Gimli: And this in turn has given rise to the belief ...
Merry: [of the Entmoot] It's been going for hours. Pippin: They must have decided something by now. Treebeard: Decided? No, we have just finished saying "Good Morning". Merry: But it's night time already! You can't take forever! Treebeard: Now, don't...
[from extended version] Merry: [watching Saruman look out at the ruin of Isengard from the tower] He doesn't look too happy, does he? Pippin: Not too happy at all, Merry. Merry: Still, I suppose the view would be quite nice from up there. Pippin: Oh ...
Charlotte: 25 years. That's uh, well it's impressive. Bob: Well you figure, you sleep one-third of your life, that knocks out eight years of marriage right there. So you're, y'know, down to 16 in change. You know you're just a teenager, at marriage, ...
Yuri Orlov: Without operations like mine it would be impossible for certain countries to conduct a respectable war. I was able to navigate around those inconvenient little arms embargoes. There are three basic types of arms deal: white, being legal, ...
Eddie Scrap-Iron Dupris: All fighters are pig-headed some way or another: some part of them always thinks they know better than you about something. Truth is: even if they're wrong, even if that one thing is going to be the ruin of them, if you can b...
Gretel McAlbertson: Why are you stealing food? Ratso Rizzo: I was just, uh, noticing that you're out of salami. I think you oughtta have somebody go over to the delicatessen, you know, bring some more back. Gretel McAlbertson: Gee, well, you know, it...
[Ward runs out of a door, scared to tears] Ward's Assistant: What happened? Ward: The kid almost touched me. She got this close to me. Ward's Assistant: She wasn't scared of you? She was only six. Ward: [shakes his assistant] I could have been dead. ...
Mike: Get out of here. You're ruining everything. Sulley: I went back to get your paperwork and there was a door. Mike: What? A door? Sulley: Randall was in it. Mike: Wait a minute, Randall? That cheater! He's trying to boost his numbers. Sulley: The...
