Most people would look at an animal in a cage and instinctively feel that it should be set free. . . . It's a dangerous world out there, filled with predators. . . . What would you prefer? A comfortable, safe, warm, cosy life in a cage, or an uncerta...
What if guns shot clouds, rather than bullets? Then they’d not only be peaceful, but they’d be delayed water guns. Is there a Nobel Farm Prize?
The moon melted in my mouth like a mask in a masquerade. “A vagina is a door to a new world,” I thought as I grabbed the handle and gave it a turn.
Turn a pot into a hat in one easy step: put it on your head. I make love with the same sort of culinary innovation.
Women should have nipples on their butts. From a design perspective, I think it would revolutionize the fashion industry.
Entrepreneurs adopt the ways of the adept and adapt to a changing environment. Actually, entrepreneurs are more enterpreneurs, because they are forever entering into new territory.
Nobody looks at what can’t look. We don’t see what doesn’t see. If love is blind, then so are we, because it’s all around us.
Better than learning how to speak a foreign language, is to start speaking the truth. But few people will listen, because they just don’t understand.
Instead of sidewalks, why not sideruns? After all, the pace of life is faster than it has ever been, so I think our infrastructure’s nomenclature should reflect that.
The world is a sad place today. I miss the good ol’ days. Gosh, why can’t I just go back to last weekend?
Revenge is like politics, one thing always leads to another until bad has become worse, and worse has become worst.
Blackmailers never explain their thinking. They're like pirates that way. Dark-hearted, dangerous--- and cool like Johnny Depp.
The things other people have put into my head, at any rate, do not fit together nicely, are often useless and ugly, are out of proportion with one another, are out of proportion with life as it really is outside my head.
Knowing you don't have much time left changes things. You get kind of philosophical. And you figure things out-more like, they figure themselves out-and everything gets real clear.
Be creative enough to dream, brave enough to try, persistent enough to succeed, and humble enough to thank those who helped you along the way.
I didn't know why I was going to cry, but I knew that if anybody spoke to me or looked at me too closely the tears would fly out of my eyes and the sobs would fly out of the throat and I'd cry for a week.
Jesus doesn't adjust to us, and He doesn't submit to our whims. We adjust to Jesus and submit to Him. Jesus is King, not an accessory.
I did standup for a lot of years, too, but when you come out as a standup, you get the feeling from a crowd - it's a kind of a 'make me laugh' attitude. But when you come out as an improvisor, they realize that they're suggesting everything you do. S...
I can't wait to be that age and hanging out with a bunch of people hanging out all day playing golf and going to the beach, all my own age. We'd be laughing and having a good time and getting loopy on our prescription drugs. Driving golf carts around...
The first time you go on holiday is the test of a relationship, when you really find out if you're compatible or not. You find out what's annoying about that person, and whether or not you're willing to put up with that because you love them and you ...
I did a lot of writing for a lot of different kinds of bands that I was in and out of during those five years and that left me with a little body of songs that I liked better when I played alone, so I ended up going out solo and very soon made my fir...
