Michael Wong: How do you know she's not a plant for Rick Stokes? Anne Kronenberg: Are you guys always this paranoid? Michael Wong: Yes, we take after Harvey. Harvey Milk: Shouldn't you be doing someone's laundry? Michael Wong: Shouldn't you be at a h...
Isaac Davis: This is so antiseptic. It's empty. Why do you think this is funny? You're going by audience reaction? This is an audience that's raised on television, their standards have been systematically lowered over the years. These guys sit in fro...
Hawkeye Pierce: Duke? Duke Forrest: [in the middle of a brain operation with Spearchucker] Uh... what is it? Hawkeye Pierce: Henry's got our orders. We can go home. Duke Forrest: Right now? Spearchucker: Anytime! Whenever we want. Spearchucker: [to D...
Rusty: You'd need at least a dozen guys doing a combination of cons. Danny: Like what, do you think? Rusty: Off the top of my head, I'd say you're looking at a Boeski, a Jim Brown, a Miss Daisy, two Jethros and a Leon Spinks, not to mention the bigge...
Girl: How come you don't play during daytime? I see you here everyday. Guy: During the daytime people would want to hear songs that they know, just songs that they recognize. I play these song at night or I wouldn't make any money. People wouldn't li...
Roman Castevet: No pope ever visits a city where the newspapers are on strike. Minnie Castevet: I heard he's gonna postpone and wait till it's over. Guy Woodhouse: Well, that's showbiz. Roman Castevet: That's exactly what it is: all the costumes, the...
Immigration Officer #1: What about homosexuality, Tony? You like men, huh? You like to dress up like a woman? Tony Montana: What the fuck is wrong with this guy, man? He kidding me or what? Immigration Officer #2: Just answer the questions, Tony! Ton...
[from trailer] Spock: Captain, I cannot allow you to do this! Bones: Jim, you're not actually going after this guy, are you? James T. Kirk: I have no idea what I'm supposed to do! I only know what I *can* do!
Shrek: Does anyone know where this Farquaad guy is? [Donkey jumps up and down, shouting out] Donkey: Oh, I know! I know where he is! Shrek: Does anyone ELSE know where to find him? Donkey: Pick me! Pick me! Me! Me!
Ticket Taker: Hey wait a minute, where is your guardian? Cartman: What? Ticket Taker: I knew it! You paid a homeless guy to get you in. Didn't you? Cartman: Fuck off, you donkey-raping shit eater.
Alonzo Harris: All right, burn it, barbecue it, fish-fry it, I don't give a fuck, but it'll make the boys feel better... Jake Hoyt: Fuck their feelings. Alonzo Harris: You're not makin' them feel like you're part of the team. Jake Hoyt: Team? You guy...
Diane: You can't stay in here all day dreaming about heroin and Ziggy Pop. Mark "Rent-boy" Renton: It's Iggy Pop. Diane: Whatever. I mean, the guy's dead anyway. Mark "Rent-boy" Renton: Iggy Pop's not dead. He toured last year!
Verbal: It didn't make sense that I'd be there. I mean, these guys were hard-core hijackers, but there I was. At that point I wasn't scared, I knew I hadn't done anything they could do me for. Besides, it was fun. I got to make like I was notorious.
Jordan Belfort: You wanna know what money sounds like? Go to a trading floor on wall street. Fuck this, shit that. Cunt, cock, asshole. I couldn't believe how these guys talked to each other! I was hooked in seconds. It was like mainlining adrenelin.
Nobody could like Donald Trump, surely, except his mother. No one really likes The Donald. But how can you not have respect for a guy who's been down on the floor and just keeps coming back? Nothing will keep Donald Trump down until they drive a wood...
I think one of the reasons I've had success in hip-hop is that I can bring out vulnerability in people who are generally seen as tough guys. To me, when a hip-hop musician always plays tough, I find it annoying because I know they're not really like ...
The thing is, don't get me wrong, I still love scoring and I hate to lose but now I see myself more as making players play better. Sometime you do what you have to do and you have to perform, that is still there, but in my mind I am thinking about ma...
In a serious relationship, I will definitely write music about a guy. I'm totally into mix tapes and I'm all about small little things. I'll drop by their door and just leave a gift or come over if they're sick and make them chicken noodle soup and r...
I remember telling my second-graders the basic 'Metamorphosis' story, saying, like, 'What about - what if a guy woke up one morning and he was a bug? Wouldn't that be weird?' And they loved that. And I think that was the trigger that made me think, l...
With all the care that women do and all the money we spend to maintain our hair, men can at least take the time to wash their face with a simple inexpensive product that will soften their facial hair so they're not hurting us when we go in for a kiss...
I don't hate redheads! The millionaire men - wealthy men - never pick them. Every time I offer them they say no. I could say the most gorgeous redhead in the world and they'll say no, they don't want it. Now if you ask an Irish guy in Ireland, he say...
