John: And we're looking after him, are we? Grandfather: I'll look after myself. Paul: Yeah, that's what I'm afraid of. John: He's got you worried, then? Paul: Him? He's a villain, a real mixer. And he costs you a fortune in Breach of Promise cases.
Shake: Well, he just asked if he could have those photos, and Norm said no, and I said, "Well, why not be big about it?" Paul: Yeah, and? Norm: And your grandfather pointed out that Shake was always being taller than me just to spite me!
Wilson: I'll tell you something, Myrt. Myrtle Mae Simmons: Yeah? Wilson: You know, you not only got a nice build, but you got something else, too. Myrtle Mae Simmons: Really? What? Wilson: You got the screwiest uncle that ever stuck his puss inside o...
Theodore: Well, you really are your own worst critic. I'm sure it's amazing. I remember that paper that you wrote in school about synaptic behavioral routines - that made me cry. Catherine: [laughs] Yeah, but everything makes you cry. Theodore: Every...
Perry: Rule number one: this business, real life, it's boring. Do you have to smoke? Harry: You want me to put it out? Perry: Yeah, soon as you find a large, brown clump of shrubs, just throw it in there.
Todd: Yeah! I think I'm in love with her, dude. Marty: She looks like she's about 11 years old but... Todd: I can wait! I solemnly vow to save myself for her. Marty: I can see how that would be really difficult for you.
Daniel: And her name's Joanna? Sam: Yeah, I know, just like Mum. Spooky. Daniel: Well, in one way then, we're in luck. At least we still have the god-like genius of Scott Walker. [he puts Scott Walker's "Joanna" on the stereo, and they lip-sync to it...
"Hatchet" Harry: You must be Eddie, J.D.'s son. Eddie: Yeah. You must be Harry. Sorry, didn't know your father. "Hatchet" Harry: Never mind son, you just might meet him if you carry on like that.
Sid Hudgens: 'It's Christmas Eve in the City of Angels and while decent citizens sleep the sleep of the righteous, hopheads prowl for marijuana, not knowing that a man is coming to stop them! Celebrity crimestopper Jack Vincennes, scourge of grasshop...
Fred Madison: Andy, who is that guy? Andy: I don't know his name. He's a friend of Dick Laurent's, I think. Fred Madison: Dick Laurent? Andy: Yeah, I believe so. Fred Madison: But Dick Laurent is dead, isn't he?
Fred Madison: I had a dream about you last night. Renee Madison: Yeah? What was it about? Fred Madison: You were in the house, calling my name, but I couldn't find you. Then there you were, lying in bed... but it wasn't you. It looked like you, but i...
Banzai: I thought things were bad under Mufasa. Scar: What did you say? Banzai: I said Muf... [Shenzi elbows him] Banzai: I said, uh... Que pasa? Scar: Good. Now get out. Banzai: Yeah, but... we're still hungry. Scar: *Out*!
Toby Wright: Liza Weld. She did the Kennedy Scholarship at my college. I had a little thing for her at the time. Judy: I can imagine, yeah. Toby Wright: Don't think she remembered me, to be honest. Judy: That is one of the side-effects of Rohypnol.
A.J. Brown: [on the phone] I just got off the phone with Linton, who proceeded to bitch me out for allowing "I Heart Huckabees" on the troops' DVD roster. Yeah. You know that phrase, "I'm too old for this shit"? Well, I'm too young for this shit. You...
Eddie Scrap-Iron Dupris: Yeah right, you're the smart one. You're the one learning Greek. Frankie Dunn: It's Gaelic. Eddie Scrap-Iron Dupris: Well you just protected yourself out of a championship fight! How do you say that in Gaelic?
Trevor Reznik: You know I'm not at National any more? Miller: Yeah, I heard about it. Sounds like you almost lost an arm yourself. Trevor Reznik: Don't you find that a bit ironic, Miller? Miller: Ironic? I'm sorry, kid, I never got out of the sixth g...
Max: The best thing to do is to get your ass out of here. Best way that you can. Billy Hayes: Yeah, but how? Max: Catch the midnight express. Billy Hayes: But what's that? Max: [laughs] Well it's not a train. It's a prison word for... escape. But it ...
Brigid O'Shaughnessy: Mr. Archer was so alive yesterday, so solid and hearty... Sam Spade: Stop it. He knew what he was doing. Those are the chances we take. Brigid O'Shaughnessy: Was he married? Sam Spade: Yeah, with ten thousand insurance, no child...
Jonathan Mardukas: You ever had sex with an animal Jack? Remember those chickens on the Indian reservation? There were some good looking chickens there Jack. You know, between us... Jack Walsh: Yeah, there were a couple there I might've taken a shot ...
Duke Forrest: [Hawkeye stands beside a Jeep. Duke assumes he is the driver] Uh, 4077 M*A*S*H? Hawkeye Pierce: This is the Jeep, yeah. Duke Forrest: [Sets in his bag then gets in] 'Kay, let's go, boy. Get my other bag. Hawkeye Pierce: Yes, sir. Yes, s...
Caine: You going to Kansas with this fool? Sharif: Yeah, Caine. You should come too, man. I mean, you're not doing nothing out here but getting yourself in a lot of trouble. I know your grandmother would be happy. Caine: Shit, I ain't going no place.
