Roger Rabbit: Yeah. Check the probate. Why, my Uncle Thumper had a problem with HIS probate, and he had to take these big pills, and drink lots of water. Eddie Valiant: Not prostate, you idiot, PROBATE!
Jordan Belfort: My wife, Naomi, the Duchess of Bay Ridge, Brooklyn. A former model and Miller Lite girl. Yeah. She was the one with my cock in her mouth in the Ferrari, so put your dick back in your pants.
Out of all the ridiculous religion stories - which are greatly, wonderfully ridiculous - the silliest one I've ever heard is, 'Yeah, there's this big, giant universe, and it's expanding, and it's all going to collapse on itself, and we're all just he...
Yeah, I think it motivates you as people start to count you out. It doesn't make you play any harder, because every time you go out on the field you give 110 percent, but it does give you more of an edge mentally, knowing that you were in the same si...
My guiltiest pleasure? 'Untamed & Uncut'. Videos of people being attacked by animals. Yeah. I don't know why. I just love seeing guys who say, 'I'm gonna stick my hand in that crocodile's mouth and see what happens.' And then it snaps down on them. T...
Selena: What's up? Jim: Nothin'. Got a headache. Selena: Bad? Jim: Yeah, it's pretty bad. Selena: Well, why didn't you say anything before? Jim: Well, because I didn't think you'd give a shit.
Tom: [split screen scene on the train about Millie's wedding] Yeah but you said you were going that's why I'm going. McKenzie: And that's why I called her last night and told her I was sick, like a ninja.
[Bud is being put into the fluid-breathing suit] Virgil: So, I can hear you, but I can't talk, right? Ensign Monk: The fluid prevents the larynx from making sound. Excuse me. It'll feel a little strange. Virgil: Yeah, no shit.
John Chambers: [after hearing of the plan to get the hostages out] So you want to come to Hollywood, act like a big shot... Tony Mendez: Yeah. John Chambers: ...without actually doing anything? Tony Mendez: No. John Chambers: [smiles] You'll fit righ...
Dan: Don't you know anything about your father? Violet: Yeah. Dan: What? Violet: I do. I know what mom says. Dan: What does mom say? Violet: She says you're a pathetic loser. Dan: She says that affectionately.
Susan Vance: Now that's all perfectly clear, isn't it? Dr. Fritz Lehman: Yeah-No it *isn't* ! You see - she's going to give me an explanation... David Huxley: No no no and my dear sir, it never *will* be clear, as long as she's explaining it!
Burton Mercer: This, gentlemen, is the elegant abode of one Elwood Blues. Officer Mount: Thanks for your help, Mr. Mercer. Burton Mercer: You know, I kind of like the Wrigley Field bit. Officer Mount: Yeah, *real* cute.
David Shayne: You're gonna write it? Cheech: What am I? A fuckin' idiot? They taught me how to read and write in school before I burned it down. David Shayne: You burned down your school? Cheech: Yeah, it was Lincoln's birthday. There was nobody ther...
Bender: [after Claire kisses his neck] Why'd you do that? Claire Standish: 'Cause I knew you wouldn't. Claire Standish: [pause] Were you truly disgusted with what I did with my lipstick? Bender: The truth? Claire Standish: Yeah. Bender: [nods] No.
Lana: What were you like... before all this? Were you like me, like a GIRL girl? Brandon: Yeah... like a long time ago... but then I guess I was just like a boy girl, then I was just a jerk.
[Stella Baines is Marty's future grandmother] Stella Baines: You know, Marty, you look so familiar to me. Do I know your mother? Marty McFly: [turning to look at Lorraine, his mother in the future] Yeah, I think maybe you do...
Doughboy: I heard you like Mr. GQ Smooth now. You working over at the Fox Hills Mall? Tre Styles: Yeah, I get discounts on clothes. You like? Doughboy: You look like you sellin' rocks.
The Dude: Just take it easy man. Walter Sobchak: I'm perfectly calm Dude. The Dude: [shouting] Yeah, waving the fucking gun around? Walter Sobchak: Calmer than you are. The Dude: Will you just take it easy? Walter Sobchak: Calmer than you are.
Knox Harrington: So you're Lebowski. Maudie's told me all about you. She'll be back in a moment, sit down. Would you like a drink? The Dude: [as he sits down] Uh, yeah. White Russian? Knox Harrington: The bar's over there.
Fred Jung: That was a beautiful message. George: I meant every word of it. Fred Jung: Did you know I died two weeks after you sent me that tape? [the apparition of Fred disappears and George is left alone once again] George: Yeah, Dad. I knew that.
[Lotte comes home late at night] Craig Schwartz: You were him, weren't you? Lotte Schwartz: Yeah. Craig Schwartz: And he was with her! Lotte Schwartz: We love her, Craig. Craig Schwartz: We? Lotte Schwartz: John and me.
