My book has no plot. Wait, yes it does—in the cemetery. It’s a love story where one character is dead, and the other is a dirty pervert.
Ever seen a cat with polka-dotted zebra fur? Come to my House of Love Open House this Friday night at 8:00 PM.
I hold my cats like any other broom you’d use to sweep the floor. I’m a janitor among animal lovers.
My ashtray is full, the carton of cigarettes is empty, and I just cremated grandpa. But I never inhaled—or told him I loved him.
My love is divided into three parts. I’ll give you part one and two for free, but for the fourth installation, you’ll have to pay for it.
A fly with an elephant on its back would give the illusion of a flying elephant, if that fly were powered by my love for you.
I live a single life. But only because there’s not enough room in my astronaut suit for two. There’s no love on the moon.
I watch you while you sleep. Is that love? It would be, if I put down my binoculars, and you picked up your phone.
I haven’t entirely adjusted to the whole yum, blood, yum aspect of being a vampire. My body wants it, but my head is still like, Ew, that is BLOOD, time to faint.
Next time I will ..." "From now on I will ..." - What makes me think I am wiser today than I will be tomorrow?
Stung, I lifted my eyes to his and saw them as if for the first time. Eyes the color of rain, soft as dew and strong enough to etch a mountainside. Tears shimmered there — tears, ay Mother! Or maybe they were in my own eyes.
I have been smashed and put back together so many times nothing works right. Nothing is where it should be, heavy thumping in my shoulder where my heart now beats.
He lied all the time even when there was no need to lie [...] He needed a _history_, a sense of self. [Burnside on his father, p. 22]
Yes you may come." Paris held up a hand to delay Myrina's raptures. "But this time you will not be wearing my crown. You will be my slave, and believe me I shall enjoy ordering you around.
Every time I see my cat licking its asshole I think about my ex wife. But that’s how nostalgia works, right? We only remember the best of the available memories.
We’re not together anymore. Don’t forget it. There is a pause before he responds. Hard to forget that. The gaping hole in my chest that was left when u ripped my heart out kind of reminds me every time I breathe.
All right, you caught me. I'm secretly obsessed with you and spend all my free time writing about you in my journal. 'Dear Diary, today Will was an ass for the 467th day in a row. He's so dreamy
I was too late to be early. Good thing I was on time. And though my I love you was said at the right moment, my aim was off and I hit the wrong person.
Jika ada seseorang, satu orang saja, yang mengatakan aku tak sayang pada adikku, orang itu pasti mengacau. Bohong besar. Tak tahu apa pun. -Cerita 6: The Guilty One, TMHOLT-
And I… iyaaaa… will always love youuuu…. Huooohhh…. Henry memutus panggilan, dan seketika itu juga ahjumma Whitney Houston berhenti menggelegar. -Cerita 7: Cho Kyu Hyun and the Choco Pie, TMHOLT-
You can’t be the best all the time. But that’s what clones are for—to be you while you sleep.
