With the Book hitching rides, hiding on people, guess we’re all going to be dressing like skanks for a while, huh? Skintight or skin. Dude, everybody’s everything’s gonna be hanging out, and some o’ those fat chicks at the abbey are gonna gro...
DJ Ruby Rhod: We'll find out everything there is to know about the D man: his dreams, his desires, his most intimates of intimates, and from what I'm looking at, "intimate" is the stud muffin's middle name. So tell me my man, are you nervous in the s...
Bast crouched down and began making weird chittering noises. Uh-oh. She was imitating birds. I'd seen enough cats do this when they were stalking. Suddenly my own obituary flashed in my head: Carter Kane, 14, tragically died in Paris wen he was eaten...
This is an extra letter in the middle of the month because I'm rather lonely tonight. It's awfully stormy; the snow is beating against my tower. All the lights are out on the campus, but I drank black coffee and I can't go to sleep. I had a supper pa...
They caught up with each other's news casually, leaving long, cosy gaps of silence in which to go to work on their muffins and coffees. Jerome - after two months of having to be witty and brilliant in a strange town among strangers - appreciated the ...
Enid: I already told you I'm not going to college. Enid's Dad: [spreading jam on a muffin] Well, I think it's a good idea to keep all your options open. You could even enrol in the winter quarter. You could actually live here and go to the city colle...
As women we’re taught to believe that the more physically appealing we look, the more love we’ll receive in return. If we can just be the perfect cook, cleaner, lover, CEO hottie – well heck, if you don’t value yourself with all those attribu...
Hank Palmer: [addressing crowd of ruffians] Possession of a controlled substance? Domestic violence? That's you. You all right, honey? What other random myriad of fucking misdemeanors is gonna come to light while you're drawing out in the slammer? Fa...
Morning is an important time of day, because how you spend your morning can often tell you what kind of day you are going to have. For instance, if you wake up to the sound of twittering birds, and find yourself in an enormous canopy bed, with a butl...
No I am not okay. I've just been pulled out of play tryouts where I had to be the first to audition and everyone's trying out for the same parts, I just had a very bizarre conversation with the school secretary, Megan may be throwing up her cucumber ...
TV Repairman: Hey - who did Muffin take to the Masquerade Ball when her date came down with the measles? David: Her father. TV Repairman: That's right! And how'd she dress him? David: As Prince Charming. TV Repairman: Nice! Remember the one where Bud...
Frank T.J. Mackey: In this big game that we play, life, it's not what you hope for, it's not what you deserve, it's what you take. I'm Frank T.J. Mackey, a master of the muffin and author of the Seduce and Destroy system now available to you on video...
