The Witch: I'm not a witch, I'm not a witch! Sir Bedevere: But you are dressed as one! The Witch: *They* dressed me up like this! Crowd: We didn't! We didn't... The Witch: And this isn't my nose. It's a false one. Sir Bedevere: [lifts up her false no...
King Arthur: Old woman! Dennis: Man. King Arthur: Man, sorry. What knight lives in that castle over there? Dennis: I'm 37. King Arthur: What? Dennis: I'm 37. I'm not old. King Arthur: Well I can't just call you "man". Dennis: Well you could say "Denn...
Frank T.J. Mackey: [Frank is speaking to followers at his seminar] Men are shit. What? Men... are... *shit*. What, isn't that what they say? Because we do bad things, don't we? We do horrible, heineous, *heinous*, terrible things. Things that no woma...
Jim Kurring: Now calm yourself down. Marcie: [shouts] I am calm! Jim Kurring: No you are not calm. You're screaming at me. Do you understand? I got a call for disturbance, and I'm going to checking it out. That is what I'm going to do. Are you alone ...
Professor Henry Higgins: Eliza, you are to stay here for the next six months learning to speak beautifully, like a lady in a florist's shop. If you work hard and do as you're told, you shall sleep in a proper bedroom, have lots to eat, and money to b...
Professor Henry Higgins: Marry Freddy! What an infantile idea, what a heartless, wicked, brainless thing to do. She'll regret it. She'll regret it! It's doomed before they even take the vow. [sings] Professor Henry Higgins: I can see her now, "Mrs. F...
Professor Henry Higgins: Have some chocolates, Eliza. Eliza Doolittle: [halting, tempted] 'Ow do I know what might be in 'em? I've 'eard o' girls bein' drugged by the likes o' you. Professor Henry Higgins: [Takes a chocolate and breaks it in half] Pl...
Harvey Milk: [answering the phone] Scotty? Paul: I'm sorry, sir. I read about you in the paper. Harvey Milk: I'm sorry, I can't talk right now. Paul: Sir, I think I'm gonna kill myself. Harvey Milk: No, you don't want to do that. Where are you callin...
Harvey Milk: Hey, I like the way your pants fit... Where are you from, kid? Cleve Jones: [laughs] Sorry old man, not interested. Harvey Milk: I'm Harvey Milk. I'm running for Supervisor. What's your name? Cleve Jones: Cleve... Jones. Harvey Milk: Wel...
Humphrey: So, just listen. Now, did I or did I not... do... vaginal... juices? Pupils: Mmm. Mmm. Yes, sir. Yes, sir. Humphrey: Name two ways of getting them flowing, Watson. Watson: R - rubbing the clitoris, sir? Humphrey: What's wrong with a kiss, b...
Mrs. Hendy: Do all philosophers have an S in them? Mr. Hendy: Yeah I think most of them do. Mrs. Hendy: Oh... Does that mean Selina Jones is a philosopher? Mr. Hendy: Yeah... Right, she could be... she sings about the Meaning of Life. Mrs. Hendy: Yea...
Maria the cleaning woman: I used to work in the Académie Française / but it didn't do me any good at all. / And I once worked in the library in the Prado in Madrid / But it didn't teach me nothing I recall. / And the Library of Congress you would h...
[last lines] George: [talking about their dream] We're gonna get a little place. Lennie: Okay, yeah, we're gonna get a little place and we're gonna... George: We're gonna... Lennie: ...have... George: [Lennie mouths what he says] We're gonna have a c...
[addressing his class] Professor Biesenthal: Well, you four have the dubious honor of having been picked from over two hundred applicants for this seminar. Well, let me just say this. There's a shortage of natural resources. There's a shortage of bre...
Sam Bell: Well then I'm goin back, that's it for me. Clone #2: Pfft! Sam Bell: What? Clone #2: Is that what you really think? Sam Bell: Yea, I've got a contract... I'm, I'm goin home. Clone #2: You're a fuckin' clone, you don't have shit! Sam Bell: H...
Billy Beane: It's hard not to be romantic about baseball. This kind of thing, it's fun for the fans. It sells tickets and hot dogs. Doesn't mean anything. Peter Brand: Billy, we just won twenty games in a row. Billy Beane: And what's the point? Peter...
Mr. Dawes Sr.: Well, do you have anything to say, Banks? George Banks: Well, sir, they do say that when there's nothing to say, all you can say... [He feels Michael's tuppence in his pocket, takes it out and looks at it] Mr. Dawes Sr.: Confound it, B...
Estate Agent: That's your sofa, which also doubles up as a bed, which is great, you know, cause you can be watching some telly and you ain't got to hassle having to get outta the bedroom, you can just open it up, get your kip. Kitchen just through th...
Brendan Harris: I know you can speak. So say it, say you love me. [Ray loks at John, Brendan grabs him by the hair and pulls his face towards himself] Brendan Harris: Don't look at him, look at me say it say you love me! [Ray gets out of his grasp an...
John Anderton: [about Witwer's father] What does he think about your chosen line of work? Danny Witwer: I don't know. He was shot and killed when I was 15 on the steps of our church in Dublin. I know what it's like to lose someone close, John. 'Cours...
Danny Witwer: [getting into the elevator] You're in a lot of trouble, John. John Anderton: You set me up. Danny Witwer: I'll write the paranoia off to the whiff you've been doping on... [John slams him against the elevator wall and draws his gun, the...
