Chief Inspector Uhl: As you know... we some times follow Duchess Von Teschen for her protection... Yesterday she was seen in the company of another man... Crown Prince Leopold: What man? Chief Inspector Uhl: Eisenheim, the illusionist. Crown Prince L...
Lenny: Hang on a minute, Nathan. Something stinks. Nathan: Yeah, your fucking aftershave. Lenny: Fuck you, funny man. J: For God's sake, help me. I'm in pain. I'm in so much pain! Lenny: Go in slowly, Nathan. Nathan: Fuck you, funny man. You go first...
Kermit the Frog: If you please sir, why open the office tomorrow? Other businesses will be closed; there'll be no one to do business with. It'll waste a lot of expensive coal for the fire! Rats: Yeah! Ebenezer Scrooge: It's a poor excuse for picking ...
Ben: [after killing a black man] Here's our golden opportunity to see if that legend about their size is true. Rémy, pull his pants down. We'll know in a jiffy. Good Lord! He's really well hung. You can wrap it up now. It's disgusting. The kid's bar...
Dr. Will Gruber: When did you begin to believe you were Jesus? John Oldman: When did you begin to believe you were a psychiatrist? Dr. Will Gruber: Since I graduated from Harvard Medical School and finished my residency, I've had that feeling. Why I ...
John Oldman: I had a chance to sail with Columbus, only I'm not the adventurous type. I was pretty sure the earth was round, but at that point I still thought he *might* fall off an edge some place. The Group: [incredulous looks all around the room] ...
Jo McKenna: You know what I was just thinking? You know what is paying for this three days in Marrakech? Dr. Ben McKenna: Sure, me. Jo McKenna: Mrs. Campbell's gall stone. [both laughed] Jo McKenna: . And you know the purse I bought in Paris? Philip'...
Jonathan Mardukas: [impersonating an FBI agent] Would you describe exactly what the last man who passed a $20 bill to you looked like? Bar Cashier: Thirty, tall... Jonathan Mardukas: About 6 feet? Bar Cashier: [shakes head] Six-five. Jonathan Marduka...
Fred Gailey: Your Honor, every one of these letters is addressed to Santa Claus. The Post Office has delivered them. Therefore the Post Office Department, a branch of the Federal Governent, recognizes this man Kris Kringle to be the one and only Sant...
Hawkeye Pierce: All right! I demand an explanation. Hawkeye Pierce: Someone get that dirty old man out of this operating theater. Col. Wallace C. Merril: [taken aback] Dirty old man? I'm Colonel Merrill. Hawkeye Pierce: I don't care if you're Jack Ar...
O-Dog: Hey man, I was gonna tell you somethin' 'fore we went up in the house, man. Caine: What's up? O-Dog: Oh nigga, guess what? Word got back about them little marks who jacked you and Harold. I know were they be kickin' it at. Down with a 187? Cai...
Ed Crane: [narrating] There they were. All going about their business. It seemed like I knew a secret, a bigger one even than what had really happened to Big Dave. Something none of them knew. Like I had made it to the outside somehow, and they were ...
Ed Crane: I went to see a woman who was supposed to have powers of communicating with those who had "passed across" as she called it. She said that people who had passed across were picky about who they communicated with, not like most people you run...
[Doniphon has just faced down Valance in the diner] Tom Doniphon: Well, now; I wonder what scared 'em off? Dutton Peabody: [poking fun at Stoddard for his idealism] You know what scared 'em - the spectacle of law and order here, risin' up out of the ...
High Pockets: Well, Mr. Professor. I thought you left town. What are you doin' out here? Ransom Stoddard: I'm waiting for Liberty Valance. Why doesn't he come out? Kaintuck: Well, th-th-that's n-n-none of our b-b-b-business.
Dutton Peabody: [protesting his nomination to the statehood convention] Good people of Shinbone; I, I'm your conscience, I'm the small voice that thunders in the night, I'm your watchdog who howls against the wolves, I, I'm your father confessor! I -...
Oogie Boogie Man: Ashes to askes and dust to dust! Ohh... I'm feeling weak - with hunger! One more roll o the dice oughta do it! [places the dice in the skull shaker but recieves a pair of ones] Oogie Boogie Man: WHAT? SNAKE-EYES! [strikes the table ...
Inigo Montoya: Do you hear that, Fezzik? That is the sound of ultimate suffering. My heart made that sound when Rugen slaughtered my father. The man in black makes it now. Fezzik: The man in black? Inigo Montoya: His true love is marrying another ton...
Nice Guy Eddie: Ain't that a sad sight, Daddy, the man walks in the prison a white man, walks out talkin' like a fuckin' nigger. You know what, I think it's all that black semen been pumped up your ass so far, now it's backed into your fuckin brain, ...
Alan-A-Dale: Man, oh man! That Prince John sure made good as threat! And his helpless subjects paid dearly for his humiliation, believe me. Taxes, taxes, taxes. Why he taxed the whole heart and soul out of the poor people of Nottingham, and if you co...
Man in a Punt: Great sport, this! Woman in a Punt: What? Man in a Punt: I said, it's great sport, this punting! [Their punt passes another one beached behind some reeds, where James and Sylvia are making out] James Bond: I couldn't agree with him mor...
