Sometimes, laughing like a lunatic can be the best solution. Or crying loudly into a pillow. But don't regret anything. Always tell yourself "I. Regret. Nothing." because really, no matter how sucky, or crappy your life gets, you really shouldn't reg...
Nothing is ever truly set in stone. You and you hold the key to your life. When Fate's saying 'off yourself.' or Destiny is saying 'you're going to kill yourself anyway,', I want you to stand up and say 'screw you.' and go do something that makes you...
It's good to shut up sometimes.
I got into stand-up to get on a sitcom.
Growing up, I had an insane crush on Neil Tennant of the Pet Shop Boys.
I usually start my day when my kids wake up.
I liked to play dress-up.
Opportunity makes desire.
Rest makes rusty.
Opportunity makes the thief.
Love makes the time pass.
The soup makes the soldier.
Time makes love pass.
The people make the town.
Make haste slowly.
Debts make the thief.
Plenty makes dainty!
Haste makes waste.
Many a mickle makes a muckle.
Everybody makes mistakes, but when goalkeepers make them, it is costly. That's the nature of being a goalkeeper.
Becky: [on the roof about to teach Dante how to dance] Hey, Twelve-Step! [Jay looks around confused] Becky: Jay! Jay: [looks up] Lord? Becky: Up here, jackass. Jay: [moves so he can see her] What the fuck are you doing up there? Yo, if you're gonna j...
