Clark: Where do you think you're going? Nobody's leaving. Nobody's walking out on this fun, old-fashioned family Christmas. No, no. We're all in this together. This is a full-blown, four-alarm holiday emergency here. We're gonna press on, and we're g...
Clark: [the Christmas dinner table shudders, and loud gagging noises come from underneath. Clark looks to see where its coming from] Edward, what's wrong with the dog? Eddie: [Looks underneath the table] Oh, he's just yakkin' on a bone. [Grotesque ba...
Clark: Oh, I was just smelling - smiling. I was just blouse - browsing. I, uh, heh heh. Well, I guess it just wouldn't... Oh hee hee, it wouldn't be the Christmas shopping season if the stores were any less hooter than they - HOTTER than they are. Wh...
Dr. Schreber: When they first brought us here, they extracted what was in us and stored the information, remixed it like so much paint, and gave us back new memories of their choosing. But they still needed an artist to help them. I understood the hu...
Dr. Millard Rausch, Scientist: We must think logically. We must deal with his crisis logically, with calm and unemotional response! We have to remain rational. We have to remain logical. TV Commentator: Scientists like you always think that way. That...
Boolie Werthan: What I need is for somebody to drive my mother around Hoke Colburn: Well, if you don' mind my askin', sir, how come she's not hirin' for herself? Boolie Werthan: See, it's kind of a delicate situation. Hoke Colburn: Oh, yessir, yessir...
Lebel: Excuse me, but it has just occurred to me that we have forty-eight hours in which to find this Jackal [There is a chorus of "What?" and "How do you know?" from the committee members] Lebel: Am I right in assuming that the President has no enga...
The Joker: I want... my phone call. I want it. I want it! I want my phone call! Detective Stephens: That's nice. The Joker: How many of your friends have I killed? Detective Stephens: I'm a twenty-year man. I can tell the difference between punks who...
[During a bank heist, the Joker has tricked all his men into killing each other, one after the other. One of the last ones, getting wise, points his gun at another thug, who still has his mask on] Grumpy: I'm betting The Joker told you to kill me soo...
Tony Wendice: Would any of you fellows have the right time? Men's Club party member: Yes, I have. It's seven minutes past eleven. Mark Halliday: I make it only just after that. Tony Wendice: My watch has stopped. I must have over wound it. Men's Club...
[Bruce, wearing a ski mask, visits Gordon's hospital room] Jim Gordon: [lying in a hospital bed] We were in this together, and then you were gone. Bruce Wayne: The Batman wasn't needed anymore. We won. Jim Gordon: Based on a lie. Now this evil... ris...
John Blake: Not a lot of people know what it feels like to be angry, in your bones. I mean, they understand, foster parents, everybody understands, for awhile. Then they want the angry little kid to do something he knows he can't do, move on. So afte...
Professor Abraham Van Helsing: We are dealing with forces beyond all human experience, and enormous power. So guard her well. Otherwise, your precious Lucy will become a bitch of the Devil! A whore of darkness! Quincey P. Morris: Well, you're a sick ...
Rufus T. Firefly: Now, what is it that has four pairs of pants, lives in Philadelphia, and it never rains but it pours? Chicolini: Atsa good one. I give you three guesses. Rufus T. Firefly: Now let me see. Has four pair of pants, lives in Philadelphi...
Simon: Is there a detective named McClane there? Inspector Cobb: He's on suspension. Simon: No, Walter, he's not. Not today. Inspector Cobb: Who is this? Simon: Call me Simon. Inspector Cobb: What do you want? Simon: I want to play a game. Inspector ...
General Paulus: My army is not designed for this kind of fighting. Yesterday, yet again I had to promote 25 sergeants to replace the officers shot down by the sharpshooters. Those snipers are demoralizing my people. This city is no more than a heap o...
Mr. X: The girls have heard this before but... 14 years ago I had an operation on my left arm here. The doctors said that I wouldn't be able to ever use it. But what the hell do they know, I said. So I rubbed it for a half-hour every day. And slowly ...
Master Sergeant Farell: Can I Help You Sir? Lt. Col. Bill Cage: [looks confused] [talks solemnly] Lt. Col. Bill Cage: Sergeant Farell? Master Sergeant Farell: [Takes a glimpse at the tag name on his own uniform] That is my name. [smiles] Master Serge...
Van Hauser: Who is that? Brian Taylor: Taylor and Zavala. Oh shit. [Sees Van Houser's injury] Van Hauser: Taylor, would you call for a rescue? Brian Taylor: Do not move. What did he look like? Where did he go? Van Hauser: Northbound through the house...
[Arthur has broken Excalibur on Lancelot's chest] Arthur: Merlin! What have I done? Merlin: You have broken what could not be broken! Now, hope is broken. Arthur: My pride broke it. My rage broke it! This excellent knight, who fought with fairness an...
Motorcycle Cop Bobbit: [Highway Patrolman, Prendergast, and Car Driver are talking in gridlocked traffic] Gentlemen, I'm going to have to ask you to both return to your vehicles. Car Driver: But what about the car? Motorcycle Cop Bobbit: I'm going to...
