Marianne: When is a man to be safe from such wit if age and infirmity do not protect him? Elinor Dashwood: Infirmity? Mrs. Dashwood: If Colonel Brandon is infirm then I am at death's door. Elinor Dashwood: It is a miracle your life has extended this ...
Charlotte Palmer: Miss Dashwood, if only Mr Willoughby had gone home to Combe Magna, we could have taken Miss Marianne to see him, for we live but half a mile away. Mr. Palmer: Five and a half. Charlotte Palmer: No, I cannot believe it is that far, f...
[Sweeney Todd and Mrs. Lovett buy what appears to be Pirelli's Miracle Elixir] Sweeney Todd: [opens the lid] What is this? Mrs. Lovett: What is this? Sweeney Todd: Smells like piss. Mrs. Lovett: [sniffs] Smells like, eww! Sweeney Todd: Looks like pis...
Henry Gondorff: What's your problem? Doyle Lonnegan: I'm putting half a million dollars on Lucky Dan to win, third race at Riverside Park. Henry Gondorff: Can't lay that off in time. A bet like that could break us. [Hooker stares at him incredulously...
[Kenny has just died in the hospital] Cartman: I bet him he couldn't do it. I bet him a hundred dollars. Kyle: It's not your fault, Cartman. Cartman: Dude, I know, I'm just fuckin' stoked I don't have to pay him. Kyle: Oh, that's real nice! He was yo...
Cartman: [after seeing Kenny's ghost] Mom I saw him, I saw Kenny! Mrs. Cartman: Oh, you poor dear! You've been through so much. Cartman: I bet him he couldn't light a fart on fire, and now he's all pissed off [gets shocked] Cartman: damn I can't say ...
Sharon Marsh: Well good morning, Stan. Stan Marsh: Hi mom, can I have eight dollars to see a movie? Sharon Marsh: A movie? But I thought you were going ice-skating. Stan Marsh: But this is gonna be the best movie ever! It's a foreign film from Canada...
Uncle Owen: Have you seen Luke this morning? Aunt Beru: He said that he had some things to do before he started, so he left early. Uncle Owen: Did he take those two new droids with him? Aunt Beru: I think so. Uncle Owen: Well, he'd better have those ...
Scott Pilgrim: Oh God! Wallace Wells: What is it, Scott? Scott Pilgrim: I had this totally weird dream... Other Scott: Oh God! Wallace Wells: What is it, Other Scott? Other Scott: Can we skip the dream time? Color me not interested. Scott Pilgrim: Bu...
Buzz Lightyear #2: Will somebody *please* explain what's going on? Buzz Lightyear: It's all right, Space Ranger. It's a code 546. Buzz Lightyear #2: [gasps] You mean it's a...? Buzz Lightyear: Yes. Buzz Lightyear #2: And he's a...? Buzz Lightyear: Oh...
Buzz Lightyear: Buzz, are you coming? Buzz Lightyear #2: No, I... I have a lot of catching up to do with my dad. [Buzz throws the ball back to Zurg; it hits him on the head] Emperor Zurg: Good throw, son. That's my boy! Go long, Buzzy! [throws Buzz a...
Buzz Lightyear #2: Oh no, the walls are closing in! [grabs Mr. Potato head and mounts him aganist the celing of the vent] Buzz Lightyear #2: Quick, help me prop up Vegetable man here or we're done for! Mr. Potato Head: Hey! Put me down you moron! Rex...
Sephora: I do not know about such things, but I do know that the mountain rumbles when God is there, and the earth trembles, and the cloud is red with fire. Moses: At such a time, has any man ever gone to see Him, face-to-face? Sephora: No man has ev...
[Moses and Aaron go into Pharoah's throne and order freedom, the rod becomes a serpent. Which frightened Rameses' son] Rameses' son: Mother! Mother! He turned his staff into a cobra! Nefretiri: Nothing of his, will harm you my son. Rameses: The power...
[Lewis, the Guard buys a cup of coffee, just before he is introduced to the T-1000] Lewis, the Guard: Hey Gwen, you want some coffee? Gwen: No thanks. How 'bout a beer? Lewis, the Guard: Yeah, right. [examines his cup] Lewis, the Guard: Hey, I got a ...
James Cody: You know, you've got to hand it to the Mexicans when if comes to swift justice. Once the Federales get their mitts on a criminal, they know just what to do with him. They hand him a shovel, tell him where to dig, when he's dug deep enough...
Dr. Owen Fletcher: Kathryn, you're a rational person. You're a trained psychiatrist. You know the difference between what's real and what's not. Dr. Kathryn Railly: And what we say is the truth is what everybody accepts. Right, Owen? I mean, psychiat...
Billy Clanton: [as Doc Holliday is drunkenly playing a somber piece on the saloon piano, Clanton speaks, just as drunkenly] Is that "Old Dog Trey? Sounds like "Old Dog Trey." Doc Holliday: Pardon? Billy Clanton: Stephen Foster. "Oh, Susannah", "Campt...
President of Exchange: [Randolph Duke has just collapsed with shock] Mortimer, your brother is not well. We better call an ambulance. Mortimer Duke: Fuck him! Now, you listen to me! I want trading reopened right now. Get those brokers back in here! T...
Tommy: How's it going with Gail? Spud: No joy yet. Tommy: How long is it? Spud: Six weeks. Tommy: Six weeks! Spud: It's a nightmare. She told me she didn't want our relationship to start on a physical basis as that is how it would be principally defi...
Punk Leader: [the Terminator arrives naked and encounters some punks] Nice night for a walk, eh? The Terminator: Nice night for a walk. Punk: Wash day tomorrow? Nothing clean, right? The Terminator: Nothing clean. Right. Punk Leader: Hey, I think thi...