[In 1968, Noodles notices a picture] Noodles: What is this? Carol: Opening night. Fifteen years ago. Noodles: [pointing at a familiar person in the picture] Who's this? Carol: Patron saint of the place. Some actress. Noodles: Do you know her? Carol: ...
Ulysses Everett McGill: Say, uh, Cousin Wash, I suppose it'd be the acme of foolishness to inquire if you had a hair net. Washington Hogwallop: Got a bunch in yon bureau, Mrs. Hogwallop's as a matter of fact [sniff] Washington Hogwallop: . Help y'sel...
[Grandma Sarah notices that Lone Watie has painted his face] Grandma Sarah: What's all that paint about? Lone Watie: It's my death face. Grandma Sarah: You know, we're sure gonna show them redskins somethin' tomorrow. No offense meant. Lone Watie: No...
Dr. Zaius: You are right, I have always known about man. From the evidence, I believe his wisdom must walk hand and hand with his idiocy. His emotions must rule his brain. He must be a warlike creature who gives battle to everything around him, even ...
The King: [after a tender kiss from Buttercup] What was that for? Buttercup: Because you've always been so kind to me, and I'll never see you again, because I'm killing myself as soon as we reach the honeymoon suite. The King: Won't that be nice? [Po...
Count Rugen: You must be that little Spanish brat I taught a lesson to all those years ago. You've been chasing me your whole life only to fail now? I think that's about the worst thing I've ever heard. [pause] Count Rugen: How marvelous.
Jules: You remember Antoine Roccamora, half black, half Samoan, used to call him Tony Rocky Horror? Vincent: Yeah, maybe. Fat, right? Jules: I wouldn't go so far as to call the brother fat, I mean he got a weight problem. What's the nigger gonna do? ...
Jody: Lance! The goddamn phone's ringing! Lance: [getting up to answer the phone] I can hear it. Jody: I thought you told those fucking assholes never to call here this late! Lance: Yeah, I told them. And that is exactly what I'm going to tell this f...
Reverend Williams: The important thing about that freedom train, is it's got to climb mountains. We ALL have to climb mountains, you know. Mountains that go way up high, and mountains that go deep and low. Yes, we know what those mountains are here a...
[Chris Taylor takes his first hit of marijuana] Sgt. Elias: First time? Chris Taylor: Yeah. Sgt. Elias: Then the worm has definitely turned for you, man. Feel good? Chris Taylor: Yeah, it feels good. I got no pain in my neck now. Sgt. Elias: Feeling ...
Skip: Hiya, Bud! David: Hiya, Skip! Skip: Hiya, Bud! David: Hiya, Skip! Skip: Bud, can I ask you a question? David: Sure. Skip: Well, if I was to go up to your sister... What I mean is, if I was to go up to Mary Sue... David: Oh my God... are we in t...
Norrington: Good work, Mr. Brown. You've assisted in the capture of a dangerous fugitive. Mr. Brown: Just doing my civic duty, sir. Norrington: Well, I trust it you will always remember this as the day that Captain Jack Sparrow *almost* escaped. Take...
Max Bialystock: Bloom, I'm drowning. Other men sail through life, Bialystock has struck a reef. Bloom, I'm going under. I'm condemned by a society that demands success when all I can offer is failure. Bloom, I'm reaching out to you. Don't send me to ...
Ulla: Goddag på dig! Leo Bloom: Uh, I beg your pardon? Ulla: Goddag på dig! Leo Bloom: Ah, gut da! Max, have you gone mad? A receptionist who can't speak English? What will people say? Max Bialystock: They'll say, "A wuma wa wa wa wa!"
Ahmad: Eat it now. You'll never get a chance to eat Gorme Sabzi [an Iranian food] Ahmad: in future. Unless you'll marry to a fun Iranian husband and you Fouad, an Iranian wife. Fouad: What does an Iranian woman look like? Ahmad: Like me! [Ahmad moves...
H.I.: If it's all the same to you, Honey, I think I'll skip this little get together, slip out with the boys and knock back a couple of Coca Colas. [Ed gives him a look of disapproval] H.I.: I guess that wouldn't be such a good idea. Gale: So many so...
Prison Counsellor: Most men your age Hi, are getting married and raising up a family. H.I.: Well factually, the... Prison Counsellor: They wouldn't accept prison as a substitute. Would any of you men care to comment. Gale: Well, sometimes your career...
John Mason: Are you sure you're ready for this? Stanley Goodspeed: I'll do my best. John Mason: Your "best"! Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen. Stanley Goodspeed: Carla was the prom queen. John Mason: Reall...
Stanley Goodspeed: Look, I'm just a biochemist. Most of the time, I work in a little glass jar and lead a very uneventful life. I drive a Volvo, a beige one. But what I'm dealing with here is one of the most deadly substances the earth has ever known...
[Joe counts the tip and finds it is a buck short] Joe: Hey, who didn't throw in? Mr. Orange: Mr. Pink. Joe: Mr. Pink? Why not? Mr. Orange: He don't tip. Joe: He don't tip? Whaddaya mean you don't tip? Mr. Orange: He don't believe in it. Joe: Shut up!
Mr. Hennessey: In view of the fact that our Highness was taken violently ill at three o'clock this morning, put to bed with a high fever, and has ordered all her appointments for the day cancelled in toto... Joe Bradley: That's certainly pretty hard ...
