Mayor Carmine De Pasto: If you want this year's homecoming parade in my town, you have to pay for it. Dean Vernon Wormer: Carmine, I don't think it's right that you should extort money from the college. Mayor Carmine De Pasto: Look, these parades you...
Dean Vernon Wormer: Well, well, well. Looks like somebody forgot there's a rule against alcoholic beverages in fraternities on probation! Otter: What a tool. Dean Vernon Wormer: I didn't get that, son, what was that? Otter: Uh, I said, "What a shame ...
D-Day: [enters with a bruised and bloodied Otter] I found him after he called me from a phone on the side of the road outside of town. Boon: [to Otter] Holy shit! What happened to you? You look grotesqe. Otter: Some of the Omegas jumped me and did a ...
Parker: If they find what they're lookin' for out there, that mean we get full shares? Ripley: Don't worry, Parker, yeah. You'll get whatever's coming to you. Brett: Look, I'm not gonna do any more work, until we get this straightened out. Ripley: Br...
Aladdin: Wow. The palace looks pretty amazing, huh? Princess Jasmine: [glumly] Oh... It's wonderful. Aladdin: I wonder what it'd be like to live there, and have servants, and valets. Princess Jasmine: Oh, sure. People who tell you where to go and how...
Chef: This Colonel guy? He's wacko, man! He's worse than crazy. He's evil. It's fuckin' pagan idolatry. Look around you. Shit! He's loco... I ain't afraid of all them fuckin' skulls and altars and shit. I used to think if I died in an evil place, the...
Patrick Bateman: [narrating] I'm fairly certain that Timothy Bryce and Evelyn are having an affair. Timothy is the only interesting person I know. I'm almost completely indifferent as to whether Evelyn knows I'm having an affair with Courtney Rawlins...
Real Harvey: [the real Harvey Pekar introduces his on-screen character] OK. This guy here, he's our man, all grown up and going nowhere. Although he's a pretty scholarly cat, he never got much of a formal education. For the most part, he's lived in s...
Natasha Romanoff: Gentlemen, you might want to step inside in a minute. It's going to get a little hard to breathe. [as the Helicarrier starts to power up, Steve Rogers and Bruce Banner walk to the edge] Steve Rogers: Is this a submarine? Bruce Banne...
Hiro: Professor Callaghan, let him go! Is this what Abigail would have wanted? Robert Callaghan: [grieved and angry] Abigail is GONE! Hiro: This won't change anything. Trust me. I know. Robert Callaghan: [Callaghan's expression softens into a look of...
Miriam Hart: No girls like her, she is distant, and basically the only people that want to hang out with her are older boys who want to fuck her. Dan: Oh really? And you find that a big surprise? You let her walk out of the house looking like, fuck, ...
[concerning the memory cloth] Bruce Wayne: Too expensive for the Army? Lucius Fox: I don't think they tried to market it to the billionaire, spelunking, BASE-jumping crowd. Bruce Wayne: Look, Mr. Fox. Lucius Fox: Yes, sir? Bruce Wayne: If you're unco...
Ra's al Ghul: You are just an ordinary man in a cape! That's why you couldn't fight injustice and that's why you can't stop this train! Batman: Who said anything about stopping it? [Ra's al Ghul looks up, confused, and sees his own sword jammed into ...
[Jake Blues is released on parole and gets back all the things he wore when he was arrested] Corrections Officer: One Timex digital watch, broken. One unused prophylactic. [looks disgusted, picks something up with his pen] Corrections Officer: One so...
Mrs. Murphy: We got two honkies out there dressed like Hasidic diamond merchants. Matt Murphy: Say what? Mrs. Murphy: They look like they're from the CIA, or somethin'. Matt Murphy: What they want to eat? Mrs. Murphy: The tall one wants white bread, ...
Sid Loomis: You're a star because you're great and you are a great star, but let me tell you something, Helen. In the last couple of years you're better known as an adulteress and a drunk. And I say this in all due respect. Helen Sinclair: Look, I ha...
Sid Loomis: It's a little idea she's wanted to do for years. She plays Jesus' mother. Partygoer: Oh. Sid Loomis: It's a whole Oedipal thing - he loves her, wants to do in the father. Well, you can see the complications. Of course, we're talking to Ir...
Bender: Claire, you wanna see a picture of a guy with elephantitis of the nuts? It's pretty tasty. Claire: No thank you. Bender: How does he ride a bike? Bender: Oh Claire, would you ever consider dating a guy who looked like this? Claire: Can't you ...
Sam: I want to ask another question. Mike Shiner: You already did. Sam: One more. Mike Shiner: Go ahead. Sam: If you weren't afraid, what would you want to do to me? Mike Shiner: I'd pull your eyes out of your head... Sam: That's sweet. Mike Shiner: ...
Biff Tannen: Hold on one second. Let's get this straight. Marty is *your* kid, not mine. And all the money in the world wouldn't do jack shit for that lazy bum! Lorraine Baines: Stop it, Biff, just stop it! Biff Tannen: Look at him. He's a butthead j...
The Dude: It's like what Lenin said... you look for the person who will benefit, and, uh, uh... Donny: I am the walrus. The Dude: You know what I'm trying to say... Donny: I am the walrus. Walter Sobchak: That fucking bitch... The Dude: Oh yeah! Donn...
