Herman Blume: [on Max's offering a small box] What's this? [Herman opens it and looks] Max Fischer: That's the Perfect Attendance Award and the Punctuality Award. I got those at Rushmore. I thought you could choose which one you like more, and you co...
Linguini: [to Collete] Ngaah! Why is it so hard to talk to you? Okay! Here we go! You inspire me. I'm going to risk it all! I'm going to risk looking like the biggest idiot psycho you've ever seen! You wanna know why I'm such a fast learner? Why I'm ...
Linguini: [to Remy] Okay, so let's think this out. You know how to cook, and I know how to... appear human. We just need to work out a system so that I do what you want, in a way that doesn't look like I'm being controlled by a tiny rat chef - oh wil...
Lisa: What's he doing? Cleaning house? Jeff: He's washing and scrubbing down the bathroom walls. Stella: Must've splattered a lot. [both Jeff and Lisa look at Stella with disgust] Stella: Come on, that's what were all thinkin'. He killed her in there...
Della Bea Robinson: I'm having second thoughts about this. I don't know nobody in L.A. Ray Charles: Look, Bea, I don't want my kids growing up in the South. Now L.A. is where, you know, a Negro can spread his wings and fly. Della Bea Robinson: Ray, m...
Joe Gillis: [who has just has a visit from two men trying to repossess his car] [narrating] Joe Gillis: I was way ahead of the finance company. I knew they'd be becoming around and I wasn't taking any chances. So I kept it across the street in a park...
[Travers gives Ralph a list of people to his handicapped daughter, Jane] Ralph: "Albert Einstein, Van Gogh, Roosevelt, Frida Kahlo" - What is this? P.L. Travers: They all had difficulties. Jane can do anything that anyone else can do, do you understa...
Walt Disney: You look at me and you see some kind of Hollywood King Midas. You think I've built and empire and I want your Mary Poppins as just another brick in my kingdom. P.L. Travers: And don't you? Walt Disney: Now, if that's all it was, would I ...
John Hartigan: Roark! Give it up. Let the girl go. Roark Jr.: [holding a young Nancy] You can't do a goddamn thing to me Hartigan. You know who I am. You know who my father is! You can't touch me, you piece of shit cop! Look at you, you can't even li...
Nathan Landau: On this bridge on which so many great Americans writers stood and reached out for words to give America its voice... looking toward the land that gave them Whitman... from its Eastern edge dreamt his country's future and gave it words....
Colleen Goodwin: I want you to concentrate on the passengers in your car. Get to know them. Narrow the suspect pool. Look for one who seems quiet or withdrawn. Who seems nervous. As always, you have eight minutes. Colter Stevens: Eight minutes and th...
Young Charlie: Your picking us as an average family kind of gave me a funny feeling. Jack Graham: What kind of a funny feeling? Young Charlie: Oh, I don't know. I guess I don't like to be an average girl in an average family. Jack Graham: Average fam...
Ann Newton: [Answering the phone] Newton's residence, Ann Newton speaking. Oh, hello, Mrs Henderson, this is Ann. No, Mother isn't here. A telegram? Well... [looks right, then left] Ann Newton: I don't see a pencil so I'll have to have her call you b...
[looking through Shaun's LPs for suitable records to throw at two approaching zombies] Ed: 'Purple Rain'? Shaun: No. Ed: 'Sign o' the Times'? Shaun: Definitely not. Ed: The 'Batman' soundtrack? Shaun: Throw it. Ed: 'Dire Straits'? Shaun: Throw it. Ed...
Ed: Any zombies out there? Shaun: Don't say that! Ed: What? Shaun: That! Ed: What? Shaun: The zed-word. Don't say it! Ed: Why not? Shaun: Because it's ridiculous! Ed: All right... are there any out there, though? [looking out of the letter-box, he se...
Scotty: Wait. Jim, if we go in there, we'll die! Do you hear me? The radiation will kill us! Will you listen to me? Look, what the hell are you doing? James T. Kirk: I'm opening the door. I'm going in. Scotty: The door's there to stop us from getting...
Little Bonaparte: [thick Italian accent] Thank you, fellow opera-lovers. It's been ten years since I elected myself president of dis organization... an' if I say so myself, you made duh right choice. Let's look at duh record: In duh lass fissel year ...
Lord Farquaad: Mirror, mirror, on the wall / Is this not the most perfect kingdom of them all? Magic Mirror: Well, technically, you're not a king. Lord Farquaad: Ah, Thelonius? [Thelonius the Executioner smashes a small looking glass] Lord Farquaad: ...
Captain of Guards: [to Shrek, after finding him and Donkey in the woods] You there! Ogre! Shrek: Aye? Captain of Guards: [to both Shrek and Donkey] By the order of Lord Farquaad, I am authorized to place you both under arrest and transport you to a d...
Marian Starrett: You were through with gun-fighting? Shane: I changed my mind. Marian Starrett: [softly] Are you doing this just for me? Shane: For you, Marion... for Joe, and little Joe. Marian Starrett: Then we'll never see you again? Shane: Never'...
Lord Blackwood: Sherlock Holmes... and his loyal dog. Tell me, Doctor, as a medical man, have you enjoyed my work? Dr. John Watson: Let me show you how much I've enjoyed it... [He rushes at Blackwood, Holmes holds him back] Sherlock Holmes: Watson, d...
