Budd: That gentled ya down some. Ain't nobody a badass with a double dose of rock salt that deep in their tits. Not havin tits as fine or big as yours, I can't even imagine how bad that shit must sting... yet I don't want to, neither. [the Bride spit...
Prince Feisal: My friend Lawrence, if I may call him that. "My friend Lawrence". How many men will claim the right to use that phrase? How proudly! He longs for the greenness of his native land. He pines for the Gothic cottages of Surrey, is it not? ...
Sam: By the way, I feel bad. I never asked you how your love life is going. Daniel: [mock chuckles] No. As you know, that was a done deal long ago. Unless, of course, Claudia Schiffer calls, in which case I want you out of the house straight away, yo...
Col. Josef 'Pips' Priller: [speaking in German] Thank you, my dear Hans! You have just killed both of us! [slams down phone] Luftwaffe major: It is getting very difficult to get any sleep around here. Col. Josef 'Pips' Priller: Your prospects for a l...
Pu Yi, at 15: Who is this George Washington? Reginald Fleming 'R.J.' Johnston: A famous American, your majesty. A revolutionary general, the first American president. Pu Yi, at 15: Ah, like Mr. Lenin in Russia? Reginald Fleming 'R.J.' Johnston: Not q...
Fred Madison: How did you meet that asshole Andy, anyway? Renee Madison: It was a long time ago. I met him at this place called Moke's. We... became friends. He told me about a job... Fred Madison: What job? Renee Madison: Ah... I don't remember. Any...
Gimli: What kind of army would linger in such a place? Legolas: One that is cursed. Long ago the men of the mountain swore an oath to the last king of Gondor, to come to his aid, to fight. But when the time came, when Gondor's need was dire, they fle...
Theoden: I take my leave. Aragorn: My Lord Elrond. Elrond: I come on behalf of one whom I love. Arwen is dying. She will not long survive the evil that now spreads from Mordor. The light of the Evenstar is failing. As Sauron's power grows, her streng...
Léon: There was someone a long time ago. Before I came to the States. Her father didn't want her to see me. She was from a very respectable family. Mine was, you know, not so respectable. Her dad went nuts every time she'd take off to see me. Mathil...
[Gandalf picks up a book that the skeleton of a Dwarf was holding] Legolas: [to Aragorn] We must move on, we cannot linger. Gandalf: [starts reading from the book] They have taken the bridge and the second hall. We have barred the gates but cannot ho...
Katsumoto: If I am no use, I will happily end my life. Emperor Meiji: No, I need your voice in the Council. Katsumoto: It is your voice we need, Highness. You are a living god. Do what you think is right. Emperor Meiji: [ruefully] I am a living god, ...
Mulan: With all due respect, Your Excellency, I think I've been away from home long enough. The Emperor of China: Then, take this. [removes his crest from around his neck and puts it around Mulan's] The Emperor of China: So your family will know what...
Mary Wilke: [reading aloud from Issac's wife's memoir] "He was given to fits of rage, Jewish liberal paranoia, male chauvinism, self-righteous misanthropy, and nihilistic moods of despair. He had complaints about life but never any solutions. He long...
Gil: Would you read it? Ernest Hemingway: Your novel? Gil: Yeah, it's about 400 pages long, and I'm just looking for an opinion. Ernest Hemingway: My opinion is I hate it. Gil: Well you haven't even read it yet. Ernest Hemingway: If it's bad, I'll ha...
District Attorney: What is your name? Kris Kringle: Kris Kringle. District Attorney: Where do you live? Kris Kringle: That's what this hearing will decide. Judge Henry X. Harper: A very sound answer, Mister Kringle. District Attorney: Do you really b...
Papagallo: [Mechanic has just rattled off a long list of things wrong with the big rig] Well, what does all that mean? Zetta: Yeah, okay, but what does that mean? Mechanic's Assistant: [to the Mechanic] What does that mean? Mechanic: 24 hours. Mechan...
Ellen Griswold: No, we don't. You gave $500 to Eddie, and everything on this safari has cost twice as much as you figured out. Clark: Honey, there's nothing in that luggage that can't be replaced. Except for your... diaphragm. We can always cash a ch...
Michael Bolton: You think the pet rock was a really great idea? Tom Smykowski: Sure it was. The guy made a million dollars. You know, I had an idea like that once. A long time ago. Peter Gibbons: Really, what was it, Tom? Tom Smykowski: Well, all rig...
Jack Sparrow: Is there a problem between us, Miss Swann? Elizabeth: You were going to tell Barbossa about Will in exchange for a ship. Jack Sparrow: We could use a ship. But the truth is, I wasn't going to tell Barbossa about Will, as long as I had s...
Voice: We've been told about these wonder weapons the Germans were working on - long range rockets, push button bombing, weapons that don't need soldiers... Patton: "Wonder weapons"? By God, I don't see the wonder in them. Killing without heroics? No...
[in Japanese] Zeniba: I'd like to help you, dear, but there's nothing I can do. It's one of our rules here. You've got to take care of your parents and that dragon boyfriend of yours, on your own. Chihiro: But, um, can't you even give me a hint? I fe...
