Stu Price: [playing piano and singing passionately] What do tigers dream of when they take their little tiger snooze? Do they dream of mauling zebras, or Halle Berry in her Catwoman suit? Don't you worry your pretty striped head, we're gonna get you ...
Ringo: I don't snore. George: You do, repeatedly. Ringo: Do I snore, John? John: Yeah, you're a window-rattler, son. Ringo: That's just your opinion. Do I snore, Paul? Paul: With a trombone hooter like yours, it would be unnatural if you didn't. Gran...
Casino Manager: Before you go, gentlemen, there's a little matter of the bill. Norm: I'll take care of that. [Norm take a look at the bill] Norm: [shocked] Hundred eighty pounds? Casino Manager: I beg your pardon. Guineas. Casino Croupier: Your winni...
Rubeus Hagrid: [talking about Aragog] I had him from an egg, you know? Tiny little thing he was when he hatched. No bigger than a Pekingese. A Pekingese, mind you! Horace Slughorn: How sweet! I once had a fish... Francis. He was very dear to me. One ...
Alien Child: I hate women. All they do is cry all the time. Theodore: That's not true. You know men cry too. I actually like crying sometimes. It feels good. Alien Child: I didn't know you were a little pussy. Is that why you don't have a girlfriend?...
Theodore: Well, the room's spinning cause I drank too much, cause I wanted to get drunk and have sex. There was something sexy about that woman... cause I was lonely... maybe just cause I was lonely. I wanted somebody to fuck me. I want somebody to w...
Old Lodge Skins: Am I still in this world? Jack Crabb: Yes Grandfather. Old Lodge Skins: Heeya... I was afraid of that. Well sometimes the magic works and sometimes it doesn't. Let's go back to the tepee and eat my son. My newest snake wife cooks dog...
Oskar: Who are you? Eli: I'm like you. Oskar: What do you mean? Eli: [accusing tone] What are you staring at? Well? Eli: Are you looking at me? Eli: [points her finger at Oskar] So scream! Squeal! Eli: Those were the first words I heard you say. Oska...
Grandpa: Are you gettin' any? Richard: Dad! Grandpa: You can tell me, Dwayne. Are you gettin' any? Richard: Come on, please. Grandpa: [Dwayne shakes his head] No? Jesus. You're what? Fifteen? My God, man! Richard: Dad! Grandpa: You should be gettin' ...
Frank: I take it you didn't like it at Sunset Manor? Sheryl: Frank... Grandpa: Are you kidding me? It was a fucking paradise. They got pool... They got golf... Now I'm stuck with Mr. Happy here, sleeping on a fucking sofa. Look, I know you are a homo...
Rizzo the Rat: There are two things in this life I hate: heights, and jumping from them. Gonzo: Too late now. Come on, I'll catch you. Rizzo the Rat: God save my little broken body! [Jumps and falls to the ground. He looks at Gonzo] Gonzo: Missed. Ri...
Headmaster: [Bible reading] Yay, and placed they the bits in little pots. Now two boys have been found rubbing linseed oil into the school cormorant. Now some of you may feel that the cormorant does not play an important part in the life of the schoo...
Bert: Uncle Albert, I got a jolly joke I saved for just such an occasion. Would you like to hear it? Uncle Albert: [sobbing] I'd be so grateful. Bert: Well it's about me granddad, see, and one night he has a nightmare. He was so scared, he chewed his...
Adriana: Well, good luck with your book and your wedding Gil: Thanks, I think you would like Inez she has a, a very sharp sense of humour and attractive, I wouldn't say that we agree on everything Adriana: But the important things Gil: Yeah, or actua...
Herb Brooks: So, why don't we start with some introductions. YOu know, get to know eacother a little bit. Where you from. Who you are. [looks at McClanahan] Herb Brooks: Go ahead. Rob McClanahan: Rob McClanahan. St. Paul Minnesota. Herb Brooks: Who d...
[Neo sees a black cat walk by them, and then a similar black cat walk by them just like the first one] Neo: Whoa. Déjà vu. [Everyone freezes right in their tracks] Trinity: What did you just say? Neo: Nothing. Just had a little déjà vu. Trinity: ...
Atreyu: What will happen if he doesn't appear? The Childlike Empress: [sadly] Then our world will disappear - and so will I. Atreyu: How could he let that happen? The Childlike Empress: He doesn't understand that he's the one who has the power to sto...
[Shaking Billy Tim Denham's hand] Frank: You have lovely hands. Do you moisturize? Billy Tim Denham: I'm Sorry? Frank: [as he slowly crushes Denham's hand in his grip] You know, I've tried all sorts of moisturizers. I even went fragrance free for a w...
Keith Jennings: [Referring to Damien] Look, I'm not just some bystander. I was the one that found him. Robert Thorn: And I'm the one that's supposed to kill him. [Revealing daggers from Bugenhagen] Robert Thorn: These are knives. He wants me to stab ...
[last lines] Penny Wharvey McGill: Well, we need that ring. Ulysses Everett McGill: Well that ring is at the bottom of a pretty durn big lake. Penny Wharvey McGill: Uh-uh. Ulysses Everett McGill: A 9,000 hectare lake. Penny Wharvey McGill: I don't ca...
Ulysses Everett McGill: The old tactician has got a plan. For the transportation that is, I don't know how I'm gonna keep my coiffure in order. Pete: How's this a plan? How we gonna get a car? Ulysses Everett McGill: Sell that. I figure it can only h...