Game Show MC: Major, Eddie here has a little problem with his girlfriend. Did you ever have a problem like that when you were 10? John Glenn: Yes, I did, Bob. I liked a girl in my class, but all the other guys liked her too and she didn't pay any att...
Della Bea Robinson: The only thing that can help you is God, Ray! Ray Charles: Don't you talk about God! You have any idea how it feels to go blind and still be afraid of the dark? And every day, you stand and pray just for a little light, and you do...
C-3PO: [R2 is outside the Hoth base, scanning the area] You must come along now R2. There's really nothing more we can do. And my joints are freezing up. [R2 Beeps something about Luke] C-3PO: Don't say things like that! Of course we'll see Master Lu...
Major T. J. "King" Kong: Well, boys, we got three engines out, we got more holes in us than a horse trader's mule, the radio is gone and we're leaking fuel and if we was flying any lower why we'd need sleigh bells on this thing... but we got one litt...
Manny: ¡Ay, Dios mío! ¡Mira eso! Look at that one. That one right there in the pink. She's beautiful, man. Look at those titties. Tony Montana: Look at that punk with her. What's he got that I don't have? Manny: [smiling] Well, he's very handsome,...
Lily Sloane: Jean Luc, blow up the damn ship! Captain Jean-Luc Picard: No! Noooooooooo! [Smashes glass and model ships with his phaser] Captain Jean-Luc Picard: I will not sacrifice the Enterprise. We've made too many compromises already; too many re...
[Han and Chewbacca are reunited] Han Solo: Chewie? Chewie, is that you? [Chewie grabs Han and shakes him] Han Solo: Ch-Chewie! I can't see, pal. What's going on? [Chewie barks] Han Solo: Luke? Luke's crazy! He can't even take care of himself, much le...
Princess Leia: Luke, what's wrong? Luke: Leia, do you remember your mother? Your real mother? Princess Leia: Just a little bit. She died when I was very young. Luke: What do you remember? Princess Leia: Just... images really. Feelings. Luke: Tell me....
Han Solo: Well, look at you! A General, huh? Lando Calrissian: Someone must have told them all about my little maneuver at the battle of Taanab. Han Solo: Well, don't look at me, pal. I just said you were a fair pilot. I didn't know they were looking...
Seth: Look at those nipples. Evan: They're like little baby toes. It's just not fair that they get to flaunt that stuff, you know... and like, I have to hide every erection I get. Evan: Just imagine if girls weren't weirded out by our boners and stuf...
Andy Dufresne: [in a letter to Red] Dear Red. If you're reading this, you've gotten out. And if you've come this far, maybe you're willing to come a little further. You remember the name of the town, don't you? Red: Zihuatanejo. Andy Dufresne: I coul...
Floyd: Takin' bets today, Red? Red: Smokes or coins, better's choice. Floyd: Smokes. Put me down for two. Red: All right, who's your horse? Floyd: That little sack o' shit. Eighth, eighth from the front. He'll be first. Heywood: Aw, bullshit. I'll ca...
Eric Cartman: Mom, there's someone at the door. [No reply] Eric Cartman: Mom, I said there's someone at the door! Mrs. Cartman: Coming, hun. Eric Cartman: [as Liane walks past] Ay, I can't see the TV! Mrs. Cartman: Oh, look Eric, It's your little fri...
Mr. Potato Head: Oh, let's just go straight to Exhibit F - the kidnapper's vehicle was seen fleeing in this direction. [pushes the car left] Hamm: Oh, your parts are in backwards, it's this way! [pushes the toy car right] Mr. Potato Head: Hey, put a ...
Iris: God, you're square. Travis Bickle: Hey, I'm not square, you're the one that's square. You're full of shit, man. What are you talking about? You walk out with those fuckin' creeps and low-lifes and degenerates out on the streets and you sell you...
Alonzo Harris: You got a kid, right? Jake Hoyt: Yeah, I got a little girl. Alonzo Harris: I've got five. All boys. You ever need a son, you let me know. I'll hook your old lady up. I can't miss. Jake Hoyt: Can we not talk about my family? Alonzo Harr...
MacReady: Blair... he got back inside and blew the generator. In six hours, it'll be 100 below in here! Garry: Well, that's suicide! MacReady: Not for that Thing. It wants to freeze now. It knows it's got no way out of here. It just wants to go to sl...
[at the pre-tour party one of the waiters is on his way back to the kitchen with an entire tray of food] Morty the Mime: Whoah, whoah, whoah, whoah, whoah. How come you got so much here? Mime Waiter: I don't know, they're not eating it. Morty the Mim...
Withnail: [in a telephone box, speaking to his agent] Listen, I pay you 10 percent to do that. Well, lick 10 percent of the arses for me, then! Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? How DARE you! [he slams the phone down] Withnail: Fuck you! [he steps out of t...
Fix-It Felix: [after Ralph abandoned the game] Everyone calm down. Ralph probably fell asleep in the washroom of Tapper's again. [a tram pulls up] Fix-It Felix: See, here he is now. [Q*Bert hops out] Fix-It Felix: Why, it's Q*Bert! What brings you he...
Selfridge: [In the tech room, Selfridge putts a golf ball into a mug and laughs] You see that? Worker: Yes sir! Selfridge: No you didn't, you were looking at the monitor. I love this putter, Ronnie! I love this putter! Dr. Grace Augustine: Parker. Yo...