I think since I was kid people told me that they thought I was funny.
For a Catholic kid in parochial school, the only way to survive the beatings - by classmates, not the nuns - was to be the funny guy.
You have to discover when you're inadequate to be funny and you don't know you're inadequate when you're a kid.
I think it's always funny when you see kids do Shakespeare.
I never lied to a person in my life; my kids didn't, either.
My life is an awkward visit from the kids table.
I want to have the fairy-tale life with a wife and three or four kids. It will come.
I go to a regular school still, and I have the normal life of a regular kid.
The purpose of my life is being a father to my kids and being a husband to my wife.
I love driving. I've been obsessed with driving something since I was a kid.
One day I'd love a house in the country, with some chickens, dogs and kids.
As a kid, I was the neighbourhood baby-sitter - very responsible, always in charge.
I don't know if I really watched any Disney animation as a kid.
I used to be more of a wild kid. But I've slowed down.
I've gone from being bullied by jocks as a kid to being bullied by nerds as an adult.
Male athletes don't get dropped when they father kids.
I was a shy kid, a late bloomer. At 22, I was probably 16 emotionally.
I always tell my kids make your vocation your vacation.
Kids always act up the most before they go to sleep.
In my house, we speak Spanglish to the dogs, to the grandchildren, to the kids.
I like that I have kids still willing to hold my hand.
