Ron: I'm warning you Hermione! Keep that bloody beast of yours away from Scabbers or I'll turn it into a tea cozy! Hermione: It's a cat, Ronald! What do you expect? It's in his nature. Ron: A cat? Is that what they told you? It looks more like a pig ...
Hildy Johnson: [speaking to Walter on the phone] Did you hear that? That's the story I just wrote. Yes, yes, I know we had a bargain. I just said I'd write it, I didn't say I wouldn't tear it up! It's all in little pieces now, Walter, and I hope to d...
Smaug: And what about your little dwarf friends? Where are they hiding? Bilbo Baggins: Dwarves... No. No dwarves here. You've got that all wrong. Smaug: Oh, I don't think so, Barrel-Rider! They sent you in here to do their dirty work, while they skul...
Lt. Aldo Raine: [to Wicki] Ask him what he is gonna do with his uniform when he gets home. Pvt. Butz: [through an interperter] Not only do I intend to take off my uniform, I intend to burn it. Lt. Aldo Raine: Nah, see, we don't like that. We like our...
[after Ellen stops a car by showing her leg] Ellie Andrews: Aren't you going to give me a little credit? Peter Warne: What for? Ellie Andrews: I proved once and for all that the limb is mightier than the thumb. Peter Warne: Why didn't you take off al...
Helen: [picking something off Bob's shoulder] Is this rubble? Bob: [mouth is full of a huge piece of cake] It was just a little workout, just to stay loose. Helen: You know how I feel about that, Bob! Darn you, we can't blow cover again! Bob: The bui...
Quint: Hooper, what exactly can you do with these things of yours? Hooper: Well, I think I can pump 20 cc's of strictnine nitrate into him, if I can get close enough. Quint: Can you get this little needle through his skin? Hooper: No, I can't do that...
Quint: [referring to a cut on Brody's head] Chief... don't you worry about it, Chief. It won't be permanent. Wanna see somethin' permanent, boom-boom-boom? [Quint pulls out a false front tooth and laughs] Quint: Hey, Hoop, you wanna feel somethin' pe...
Earl McGraw: Who's the bride? Edgar McGraw: Don't know. The name on the marriage certificate is "Arlene Machiavelli." That's a fake. We've all just been calling her "The Bride" on account of the dress. Earl McGraw: You can tell she was pregnant. Man'...
Dill Harris: Hey. Jem: Hey yourself. Dill Harris: I'm Charles Baker Harris. I can read. I can read anything you've got. [swinging on the gate] Dill Harris: Folks call me Dill. Jem: How old are you? Four and a half? Dill Harris: Going on seven. Jem: W...
Keith: [Keith shows up out of the blue in chemistry class] Four test tubes, three beakers, and a bunsen burner. Mr. Miles: Yeah, okay, everything seems to be in order. Keys? [Keith hands him his key] Mr. Miles: Natalie? Key? [Natalie hands him her ke...
Zazu: [singing] Nooooobody knows the trouble I've seen. / Nooooobody knows my sorrow. Scar: Oh, Zazu, do lighten up. Sing something with a little *bounce* in it. Zazu: [singing] It's a small world after all... Scar: NO! No. *Anything* but that! Zazu:...
Jack Crabb: Grandfather, I have a white wife. Old Lodge Skins: You do? That's interesting. Does she cook and does she work hard. Jack Crabb: Yes, Grandfather. Old Lodge Skins: That surprises me. Does she show pleasant enthusiasm when you mount her? J...
Old Lodge Skins: Let's go back to the teepee and eat, my son. My new snake wife cooks dog very well. Jack Crabb: All right, Grandfather. Old Lodge Skins: She also has a very soft skin. The only trouble with snake women is they copulate with horses, w...
General Custer: A scout has a certain look... Kit Carson, for example. You look like... a muleskinner! Jack Crabb: Uh, General I don't know anything about mules... General Custer: Lieutenant, it's amazing how I can guess the profession of a man just ...
Olive: Why were you unhappy? Frank: I fell in love with someone... [interrupted by Grandpa blowing his nose] Frank: ...who didn't love me back. Olive: Who? Frank: One of my grad students. I was very much in love with him. Olive: *Him*? You fell in lo...
Dwayne: You know what? Fuck beauty contests. Life is one fucking beauty contest after another. You know, school, then college, then work, fuck that. And fuck the air force academy. If I wanna fly, I'll find a way to fly. You do what you love, and fuc...
Lindsey: We are dealing with a bona fide case of mistaken identity here. Slevin: Yeah. Lindsey: Things like that aren't supposed to be real. It's like amnesia. Lindsey: Not withstanding, here you are and Nick's nowhere to be found, so... I'd say you'...
Iris: [Following Miss Froy back to her compartment] Thank you for looking after me when I was - well, knocked out before. Miss Froy: Never mind, dear. Now if I were you I'd try to get a little sleep. It'll make you feel quite well again! There's a mo...
Sergeant McCaskey: You know, Roger, you are way behind the times. The guys of the 80s aren't tough. They are sensitive people. Show a little emotion to a woman and shit like that. I think I'm an '80s man... Roger Murtaugh: How do you figure? Sergeant...
Jacob Marley: Why do you doubt your senses? Ebenezer Scrooge: Because a little thing can effect them. A slight disorder of the stomach can make them cheat. You may be a bit of undigested beef, a blob of mustard, a crumb of cheese. Yes. There's more g...
