May McGorvey: You're a miracle, Ronnie. We're all miracles. Know why? Because as humans, every day we go about our business, and all that time we know... we all know... that the things we love... the people we love, at any time now can all be taken a...
Constance Harraway: The TA just finished transcribing all the governor's radio and TV comments. Listen to this gem: Journalist - "Governor, don't you think three executions in one week is a little excessive?" Governor - "I say let's bring them in, st...
General Custer: Take my advice. Go West! Olga Crabb: [in a Swedish accent] Vest? [She wails and bursts into tears] Jack Crabb: My wife, she's awful scared of Injuns. General Custer: My dear woman, you have nothing to fear from the Indians, I give you...
Frodo: Before you came along, we Bagginses were very well thought of. Gandalf: Indeed? Frodo: Never had any adventures or did anything unexpected. Gandalf: If you're referring to the incident with the Dragon, I was barely involved. All I did was give...
Gandalf: [after failing to open the magical doors of Moria] I once knew every spell in all the tongues of Elves... Men... and Orcs. Pippin: What are you going to do, then? Gandalf: Knock your head against these doors, Peregrin Took! And if that does ...
Sheryl: [to Frank] He started snorting heroin. Frank: [to Grandpa] You started snorting heroin? Grandpa: [in response to Frank, aimed at Dwayne] Let me tell ya, don't do that stuff. When you're young, you're crazy to do that shit. Frank: [to Grandpa]...
Eomer: What business does an Elf, Man, and a Dwarf have in the Riddermark? Speak quickly. Gimli: Give me your name, horse-master, and I shall give you mine. Eomer: [dismounts] I would cut off your head, Dwarf, if it stood but a little higher from the...
Ben Sanderson: Don't you think you'd get a little bored, living with a drunk? Sera: Well... that's what I want. Ben Sanderson: You haven't seen the worst of it. I knock things over... throw up all the time. These past few days I've been very controll...
[a nightmare switches between a ladies' garden club and a Soviet/Chinese military hospital] Chairlady: You will notice that I have told them they may smoke. I've allowed my people to have a little fun in the selection of bizarre tobacco substitutes.....
Ratso Rizzo: Here I am, goin' to Florida, my leg hurts, my butt hurts, my chest hurts, my face hurts, and like that ain't enough, I gotta pee all over myself. [Joe Buck laughs] Ratso Rizzo: That's funny? I'm fallin' apart here! Joe Buck: It's just - ...
Kasper Gutman: Well, sir, what do you suggest? We stand here and shed tears and call each other names... or shall we go to Istanbul? Joel Cairo: Are you going? Kasper Gutman: Seventeen years I've wanted that little item and I've been trying to get it...
Mike: Good morning, Roz, my succulent little garden snail. And who will we be scaring today? Roz: Wazowski! You didn't file your paperwork last night. Mike: Oh, that darn paperwork! Wouldn't it be easier if it all just blew away? Roz: Don't let it ha...
Celia: So, uh... are we going anywhere special tonight? Mike: I-I just got us into a little place called, um... Harryhausen's. Celia: Harryhausen's? But it's impossible to get a reservation there. Mike: Not for Googlie Bear. I will see you at quittin...
[Boo, in disguise, walks up to Mr. Waternoose] Henry J. Waternoose: Well hello, little one. Where did you come from? Sulley: Mr. Waternoose. Henry J. Waternoose: Ah, James. Is this one yours? Sulley: Ah, actually that's my uh, cousin's sister's daugh...
Cowboy: Howdy. Adam Kesher: Howdy to you. Cowboy: Beautiful evening. Adam Kesher: Yeah. Cowboy: Sure wanna thank you for coming all the way up here to see me from that nice little hotel downtown. Adam Kesher: No problem. What's on your mind? Cowboy: ...
[first lines] Christopher "Chris" Wilton: The man who said "I'd rather be lucky than good" saw deeply into life. People are afraid to face how great a part of life is dependent on luck. It's scary to think so much is out of one's control. There are m...
[as the seven are about to leave the village] Calvera: You'll do much better on the other side of the border. There you can steal cattle, hold up trains... all you have to face is sheriff, marshall. Once I rob a bank in Texas; your government get aft...
Tank: We're supposed to start with these operation programs first. That's major boring shit. Let's do something a little more fun. How about... combat training. Neo: Ju jitsu? I'm gonna learn Ju jitsu. [Tank winks and loads the program] Neo: Holy shi...
Peggy: Come on, let's see if you can guess who it is... Noodles: Charlotte russe, with a little too much whipped cream... Peggy. Peggy: Hey, you watch it, now! And my prices, they've gone up. I work in a high-class joint now, and I get paid by the po...
[last lines] [Fletcher knows he's talking to Josey Wales] Fletcher: I think I'll go down to Mexico to try to find him. Josey Wales: And then? Fletcher: He's got the first move. I owe him that. I think I'll try to tell him the war is over. What do you...
Miracle Max: You got any money? Inigo Montoya: Sixty-five. Miracle Max: I've never worked for so little. Except once, and that was a very noble cause. Inigo Montoya: This is noble, sir. His wife is... crippled. His children are on the brink of starva...
