Eric Cartman: Mom, there's someone at the door. [No reply] Eric Cartman: Mom, I said there's someone at the door! Mrs. Cartman: Coming, hun. Eric Cartman: [as Liane walks past] Ay, I can't see the TV! Mrs. Cartman: Oh, look Eric, It's your little fri...
Mr. Potato Head: Oh, let's just go straight to Exhibit F - the kidnapper's vehicle was seen fleeing in this direction. [pushes the car left] Hamm: Oh, your parts are in backwards, it's this way! [pushes the toy car right] Mr. Potato Head: Hey, put a ...
Iris: God, you're square. Travis Bickle: Hey, I'm not square, you're the one that's square. You're full of shit, man. What are you talking about? You walk out with those fuckin' creeps and low-lifes and degenerates out on the streets and you sell you...
Alonzo Harris: You got a kid, right? Jake Hoyt: Yeah, I got a little girl. Alonzo Harris: I've got five. All boys. You ever need a son, you let me know. I'll hook your old lady up. I can't miss. Jake Hoyt: Can we not talk about my family? Alonzo Harr...
MacReady: Blair... he got back inside and blew the generator. In six hours, it'll be 100 below in here! Garry: Well, that's suicide! MacReady: Not for that Thing. It wants to freeze now. It knows it's got no way out of here. It just wants to go to sl...
[at the pre-tour party one of the waiters is on his way back to the kitchen with an entire tray of food] Morty the Mime: Whoah, whoah, whoah, whoah, whoah. How come you got so much here? Mime Waiter: I don't know, they're not eating it. Morty the Mim...
Withnail: [in a telephone box, speaking to his agent] Listen, I pay you 10 percent to do that. Well, lick 10 percent of the arses for me, then! Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? How DARE you! [he slams the phone down] Withnail: Fuck you! [he steps out of t...
Fix-It Felix: [after Ralph abandoned the game] Everyone calm down. Ralph probably fell asleep in the washroom of Tapper's again. [a tram pulls up] Fix-It Felix: See, here he is now. [Q*Bert hops out] Fix-It Felix: Why, it's Q*Bert! What brings you he...
Selfridge: [In the tech room, Selfridge putts a golf ball into a mug and laughs] You see that? Worker: Yes sir! Selfridge: No you didn't, you were looking at the monitor. I love this putter, Ronnie! I love this putter! Dr. Grace Augustine: Parker. Yo...
Howard Hughes: Actresses are cheap in this town, darlin'. And I got a lot of money. Katharine Hepburn: Please, Howard, this is beneath you. Howard Hughes: No no. This is exactly me. You come over here out of the blue and tell me you're leaving me for...
[the Caterpillar has called a very frustrated Alice back so he can finish the conversation] Alice: Well? Caterpillar: Keep your temper. Alice: Is that all? Caterpillar: No. "Exaketededly" what is your problem? Alice: Well its exak... exact... Its pre...
[the brothers race around the mall parking lot] Elwood: We'll be all right if we can just get back on the expressway. Jake: This don't look like no expressway to me! Elwood: Don't yell at me. Jake: Well whadda you want me to do, Motorhead? Elwood: Tr...
Steele: Sergeant, what's the meaning of this? [Thinking he's talking about the unauthorized pig picking] "Hoot": Just a little aerial target practice, sir. Didn't want to leave 'em behind. Steele: I'm talking about your weapon, soldier. Now Delta or ...
Sam: Do you really think you'll be ready for opening tomorrow? Riggan: Yeah, yeah. Yeah, well, I mean, previews were pretty much a train-wreck. We can't seem to get through without a raging fire or a raging hard-on. I'm broke. I'm not sleeping like, ...
Biff Tannen: You're supposed to be in Switzerland, you little son of a bitch! Marty McFly: My father? Biff Tannen: Did you get kicked out of another boarding school? Damn it, Lorraine, do you know how much perfectly good dough I blow on this no-good ...
[first lines] Mother: Hello, sweetheart. Bruno: Mum, what's going on? Mother: We're celebrating. Bruno: Celebrating? Mother: Mm, your father's been given a promotion. Gretel: That means a better job. Bruno: I know what promotion is. Mother: So we're ...
Robert the Bruce: I'm not a coward. I want what you want, but we need the nobles. William Wallace: We need them? Robert the Bruce: Aye. William Wallace: Nobles. [laughs a little] William Wallace: Now tell me, what does that mean to be noble? Your tit...
Stefan Vanderhoof: [discussing the calendar] We're not gonna sell, just give it out to friends. Scott Donlan: I think we should try to sell it. Stefan Vanderhoof: Really? Scott Donlan: Yeah. Stefan Vanderhoof: Well, if we could give the money to Shih...
It seems to make little sense how a person's self-worth or self-confidence should be wrapped up in how much their jacket is worth or what shoe they are wearing. Does a person's round or pointy-tip shoe really say anything of value about who a person ...
Don't keep forever on the public road,going only where others have gone, and following one after the other like a flock of sheep. Leave the beaten track occasionally and dive into the woods. 'Every time you do so you will be certain to find something...
Once when I was a little child of six or so, I watched a spider spinning its web in a corner of the house. Before the spider had even finished its job, a mosquito flew right into the web and was trapped there. The spider didn't pay it any attention a...
