I like instant gratification. It’s like instant coffee, only it won’t keep you up all night.
The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink.I feel like the boy who cried wolf, even though I know even less about politics.
This is the best book I've ever written, and it still sucksI speak Spanish like I chew spinach—like it’s dried bubble gum stuck underneath a park bench.
The Titanic would never have sunk if it were made out of a sink.