Michael: Maybe it was an iguana. Elliot: It was *no* iguana. Michael: Maybe, um - You know how they say there are alligators in the sewers? Gertie: Alligators in the sewers. Mary: All we're trying to say is, maybe you just probably imagined it. It ha...
Alex: [voice over] This is Grandfather. Like my father and myself, he too is dubbed Alex. My grandmother, Anna, died two years before of a cancer in her brain. Precluding this, Grandfather became very melancholy, and also, he says, blind. His most re...
Edward D. Wood, Jr.: [after Thor Johnson bumps into a scenery wall while walking through a door making the wall shudder] Ok, and CUT! PERFECT! PRINT IT! Cameraman Bill: Don't you wanna do another take Ed? Seems like big baldy had some problems gettin...
Van Hauser: Who is that? Brian Taylor: Taylor and Zavala. Oh shit. [Sees Van Houser's injury] Van Hauser: Taylor, would you call for a rescue? Brian Taylor: Do not move. What did he look like? Where did he go? Van Hauser: Northbound through the house...
[while burning the Narrator's hand with lye] Tyler Durden: Shut up! Our fathers were our models for God. If our fathers bailed, what does that tell you about God? Narrator: No, no, I... don't... Tyler Durden: Listen to me! You have to consider the po...
[In the Whammy Burger] Bill Foster: Why am I calling you by your first names? I don't even know you. I still call my boss "Mister", and I've been working for him for seven years, but all of a sudden I walk in here and I'm calling you Rick and Sheila ...
President Lindberg: [phone call from President to Korben Dallas] Major Dallas, I first would like to salute a warrior, you are a shining example of this Army's might, in the name of the Federation and it's territory... Korben Dallas: Mr. President, M...
Forrest Gump: Those must be comfortable shoes, I bet you could walk all day in shoes like those and not feel a thing. Nurse at Park Bench: My feet hurt. Forrest Gump: My momma always said you can tell a lot about a person by their shoes, where they g...
Jack Lucas: [drunk and talking to the Pinocchio doll] You ever read any Nietzsche? Nietzsche says there's two kinds of people in the world: people who are destined for greatness like Walt Disney... and Hitler. Then there's the rest of us, he called u...
Crush: Okay. Squirt here will now give you a rundown of proper exiting technique. Squirt: Good afternoon. We're gonna have a great jump today. Okay, first crank a hard cutback as you hit the wall. There's a screaming bottom curve, so watch out. Remem...
Dory: Have you seen a clown fish swim by? It looks just like him. [points to Marlin] Nemo: But bigger. Crab: Yeah, I saw him, Bluey, but I'm not telling you where he went, and there's no way you're gonna make me. [Dory holds Crab out of water for the...
J.M. Barrie: You needn't steal my journal to get to know me, Mary. Mary Ansell Barrie: No, I suppose I could just go see the plays. I was hopelessly naive when I married you. I imagined that brilliant people disappeared to some secret place where goo...
Ferris: Cameron has never been in love - at least, nobody's ever been in love with him. If things don't change for him, he's gonna marry the first girl he lays, and she's gonna treat him like shit, because she will have given him what he has built up...
Sloane: What are we going to do? Ferris: The question isn't "what are we going to do," the question is "what aren't we going to do?" Cameron: Please don't say were not going to take the car home. Please don't say were not going to take the car home. ...
Airport Lot Attendant: There's a minimum charge of four dollars. Long-term parking charges by the day. Carl Showalter: I guess you think you're... you know, like an authority figure, with that stupid fuckin' uniform, huh buddy? King clip-on-tie there...
Henry Frankenstein: Dangerous? Poor old Waldman. Have you never wanted to do anything that was dangerous? Where should we be if no one tried to find out what lies beyond? Have your never wanted to look beyond the clouds and the stars, or to know what...
Judge: Percy, it don't look like you got a case at all. In the first place, there's no body. Second, we got us a preacher nobody's gonna dispute... Prosecutor Percy: But Your Honor... Judge: I'm tellin' you, What you got is a whole lotta nothing. I s...
Erin Gruwell: But to get respect you have to give it. Andre: Bullshit. Erin Gruwell: What? Andre: Why should I give you my respect to you? Because you're a teacher? I don't know you. How do I know you're not a liar standing up there. How do I know yo...
[first lines] Phil: Somebody asked me today, "Phil, if you could be anywhere in the world, where would you like to be?" And I said to him, "Prob'ly right here - Elko, Nevada, our nation's high at 79 today." Out in California, they're gonna have some ...
Matt Drayton: When I had ice cream before, I had a special kind of flavor that I liked very much but I can't remember what it was. Carhop: I'll bring you the list, sir. Matt Drayton: Oh no. You - you must know what it is. Carhop: Daquiri Ice, Honeyco...
Gamora: [talks to Drax] You don't get opinions after that nonsense you pulled on Knowhere. Drax the Destroyer: I just saved Quill! Peter Quill: We've already established that blowing up the ship I'm on isn't saving me. Drax the Destroyer: When did we...
