Linguini: [to Remy] Okay, so let's think this out. You know how to cook, and I know how to... appear human. We just need to work out a system so that I do what you want, in a way that doesn't look like I'm being controlled by a tiny rat chef - oh wil...
Skinner: I want you to work up something for my latest frozen food concept: Gusteau's Corn Puppies. They're like corn dogs, only smaller. Bite size. Francois: What are corn dogs? Skinner: Cheap sausages dipped in batter and deep fried. You know, Amer...
IRS Agent Stewart: Your income, Mr Court, hasn't changed substantially in seventeen years. Jim Court: That's right. IRS Agent Stewart: Why would you stay so long with an operation that is so clearly not a growth enterprise? Jim Court: Taking care of ...
Karl: I don't reckon you have to go with women to be a good daddy to a boy. You been real square-dealin' with me. The Bible says two men ought not lay together. But I don't reckon the Good Lord would send anybody like you to Hades. That Frank, he liv...
Vaughan Cunningham: I'm just going to say it. I'm gay. Does that surprise you that I'm gay? You know what gay is, don't you? Karl: I don't reckon. Vaughan Cunningham: [quietly] Homosexual. I like men sexually. Karl: Not funny 'ha-ha', funny queer. Va...
Ginty: [while seeing her father shave] Why do you do that? Travers Goff: For you my dear! [He flicks the blade in the air like a swordsman] Travers Goff: Swish! Which kind of kisses do you prefer, Gintamina? Swoosh! Scratchy ones or silky ones? Ginty...
Walt Disney: You look at me and you see some kind of Hollywood King Midas. You think I've built and empire and I want your Mary Poppins as just another brick in my kingdom. P.L. Travers: And don't you? Walt Disney: Now, if that's all it was, would I ...
[after being smacked in the jaw by Jackie Boy] Bozo No. 1: [about Jackie Boy] He is generous. But that temper of his... you shouldn't have picked on him like you did. My temper, you don't have to worry about. Shellie: [grabs a knife and points it at ...
Captain Jean-Luc Picard: The economics of the future are somewhat different. You see, money doesn't exist in the 24th century. Lily Sloane: No money? You mean, you don't get paid? Captain Jean-Luc Picard: The acquisition of wealth is no longer the dr...
Young Charlie: Your picking us as an average family kind of gave me a funny feeling. Jack Graham: What kind of a funny feeling? Young Charlie: Oh, I don't know. I guess I don't like to be an average girl in an average family. Jack Graham: Average fam...
[looking through Shaun's LPs for suitable records to throw at two approaching zombies] Ed: 'Purple Rain'? Shaun: No. Ed: 'Sign o' the Times'? Shaun: Definitely not. Ed: The 'Batman' soundtrack? Shaun: Throw it. Ed: 'Dire Straits'? Shaun: Throw it. Ed...
Mike Erganian: What is the subject of your book? Non fiction? Miles Raymond: Uh, no. It's... it's a novel. Fiction. Yes. Although there is quite a bit from my own life... so I suppose that, technically some of it is nonfiction. Mike Erganian: Good I ...
[as they approach Fiona's castle, Donkey smells the air] Donkey: Whoa, Shrek, did you do that? Man, you gotta warn somebody before you crack one like that, my mouth was open and everything! Shrek: Donkey, if that was me, you'd be dead! [sniffs] Shrek...
Donkey: Okay, so here's another question: Say there's a woman who digs you, right, but you really don't like her THAT quick - now how do you let her down real easy so her feelings aren't hurt, but you don't get burned to a crisp and eaten? How do you...
Billy Ansell: Mitchell Stephens, Esquire. Tell me, would you be likely to sue me if I was to beat you right now? I mean, beat you so bad you piss blood and couldn't walk for a month. Because that's what I'm about to do. Mitchell Stephens: No, Mr. Ans...
Sean Parker: Hang on. Almost forgot. [holds a check in front of Eduardo] Sean Parker: Here's your $19,000. I wouldn't cash it, though. I drew it on the account you froze. [Eduardo goes to hit Sean; Sean cowers] Eduardo Saverin: [Eduardo pulls back, h...
Fogell: Oh oh, I forgot to tell you: my mom said we could have the TV from the basement... Evan: Shut the fuck up, man. He's gonna hear you. Just be quiet; wait until he goes away. Fogell: You still haven't told him that we're rooming together? Evan:...
Seth: Alright, let's stop this and just go get some dessert. Evan: No, I can't. I gotta... go meet my counselor, I'm picking out my classes for next year. Seth: ...what? So I gotta sit here and eat my dessert alone like I'm fuckin' Steven Glansberg? ...
Red: These walls are funny. First you hate 'em, then you get used to 'em. Enough time passes, you get so you depend on them. That's institutionalized. Heywood: Shit. I could never get like that. Ernie: Oh yeah? Say that when you been here as long as ...
Heywood: It's a fine morning, ain't it? You know why it's a fine morning, don't ya? Come on, set 'em down. I want 'em all lined up, just like a pretty little chorus line. [the cons pull out cigarettes and hand them over to Heywood, who lines them up ...
Steamboat Willie: Please, I like America! Fancy schmancy! What a cinch! Go fly a kite! Cat got your tongue! Hill of beans! Betty Boop, what a dish. Betty Grable, nice gams. Steamboat Willie: singing: I say can you see! I say can you see! I... I say.....