Ron: [discussing inviting dates to the Yule Ball] This is mad! At this rate, we'll be the only ones in our year without dates! Well, us and Neville. Harry: [laughing] Yeah, but then again he could take himself. Hermione: It might interest you to know...
Lavender Brown: [runs into the hospital wing, after Ron's been poisoned] Where is he? Where's my Won-Won? Has he been asking for me? [sees Hermione sitting next to Ron's bed] Lavender Brown: What is she doing here? Hermione Granger: [stands] I might ...
Bing Bong: [Seeing a memory image of 11-year-old Riley] Whoa. Is this Riley? [Joy looks at the image and nods] Bing Bong: She's so big now. She won't fit in my rocket. How're we gonna get to the moon?" Joy: Oh, it's that time in the twisty tree, reme...
[Billy's record makes #1] Radio 1 chart show DJ: Hi, Billy! Billy Mack: Hello. Radio 1 chart show DJ: We're live across the nation, and you're number one! [Billy laughs] Radio 1 chart show DJ: How will you be celebrating? Billy Mack: I don't know. Er...
Nisus Wettus: [a line of prisoners files past a jailer] Nisus Wettus: Crucifixion? Prisoner: Yes. Nisus Wettus: Good. Out of the door, line on the left, one cross each. [Next prisoner] Nisus Wettus: Crucifixion? Mr. Cheeky: Er, no, freedom actually. ...
Peter Brand: The Visalia Oaks and our 240 lb catcher Jeremy Brown, who as you know, scared to run to second base. This was in a game six weeks ago. This guy is going to start him off with a fastball. Jeremy's going to take him to deep center. Here's ...
Vinny Gambini: [Trotter asks Vinny how he became a lawyer] Well, I got a bullshit traffic ticket. I went to court, I got the cop on the stand, and I argued with him until he admitted he was wrong. And the judge, this Judge Malloy. All the while he's ...
Mechanic 2: Ain't never seen anyone so shit-all stupid as you driving off that road. You musta got manure for your brains. Clark: Yeah, well, I'm from out of town. So, what's the bill? Come on, come on, how much? Mechanic 1: How much you got? Clark: ...
Kelly: [Josie has walked into the saloon in Santa Rio] What'll you have? Josey Wales: Whiskey. Rose: [laughing] Maybe you'd like somethin' else. Josey Wales: Beer? Kelly: Been a long time since somebody ordered a drink in San Rio. Ten Spot: Been a lo...
The Wolf: You must be Jules, which would make you Vincent. Let's get down to brass tacks, gentlemen. If I was informed correctly, the clock is ticking, is that right, Jimmie? Jimmie: Uh, one hundred percent. The Wolf: Your wife... Bonnie comes home a...
Little John: You know something, Robin? You're taking too many chances. Robin Hood: Chances? You must be joking! That was just a bit of a lark, Little John. Little John: Oh, yeah? Take a look at your hat. That's not a candle on a cake. Robin Hood: [r...
Charlie: Hey Raymond, remember today when the doctor was asking you those questions? How'd you know the answers? Raymond: [while brushing his teeth at the same time, Charlie can't make out what he said] I see it. Charlie: What? Stop that for a second...
Woody: [deleted scene] [Woody is asking the Roundup gang to come back to Andy's with him] Woody: Bullseye, are you with me? [Bullseye licks him like a dog] Woody: Ah! Okay! Good boy. [walks toward Prospector's box] Woody: Prospector, how 'bout you? [...
General Ralph Landry: You know, when they forced Khruschev out, he sat down and wrote two letters to his successor. He said - "When you get yourself into a situation you can't get out of, open the first letter, and you'll be safe. When you get yourse...
[Withnail picks up a bottle of lighter fluid] Marwood: I wouldn't drink that if I was you. Withnail: Why not? Marwood: Because I don't advise it. Even the wankers on the site wouldn't drink that, that's worse than meths. Withnail: Nonsense. This is a...
Smart Ass: We searched Valiant boss. The will ain't on him. Judge Doom: Then frisk the woman. Greasy: *I'll* handle this one... [He puts his hand down her dress and feels around for a beat before screaming in pain and removing his hand which has been...
[Carolyn is introducing Lester to the Real Estate King] Carolyn Burnham: My husband, Lester. Buddy Kane: It's a pleasure. Lester Burnham: Oh, we've met before, actually. This thing last year, Christmas at the Sheraton... Buddy Kane: [pretends to reme...
[Princess Jasmine is in disguise, and hanging out with Aladdin, when the guards capture him] Princess Jasmine: Let him go! Razoul: [laughs] Looky here, men. A street mouse. [throws her down] Princess Jasmine: Unhand him! [pulls off the hood of her cl...
Aladdin: [hanging from the entrance of the Cave of Wonders] Help me out! Jafar: [in disguise] Throw me the lamp! Aladdin: I can't hold on! Give me your hand! Jafar: First give me the lamp! [Aladdin does so] Jafar: [laughs triumphantly] Yes! At last! ...
Mirtha Jung: We are broke, that is my fucking problem and you are a fucking spy. That's right. Always spyin', always judgin'. Everyone's laughing in your face, you fucking pussy. You let Diego fuck you in the ass. Maybe because you like it, maybe bec...
The Joker: [when Batman picks up the phone in Andrea's apartment] Hello, anybody home? Listen, boopsie, even though you never call and never write, I still got a soft spot for you. So I'm sending you a fun gift, airmail! And there's no use jumping ou...