Sam: By the way, I feel bad. I never asked you how your love life is going. Daniel: [mock chuckles] No. As you know, that was a done deal long ago. Unless, of course, Claudia Schiffer calls, in which case I want you out of the house straight away, yo...
Tom: Well, he can afford to do the deal at the price we're selling. It's not worth him giving us any trouble cause he knows we'll be a pain in the arse. Soap: I'd take a pain in the arse for half a million quid. Tom: You'd take a pain in the arse for...
Centurion: You know the penalty laid down by Roman law for harboring a known criminal? Matthias: No. Centurion: Crucifixion! Matthias: Oh. Centurion: Nasty, eh? Matthias: Could be worse. Centurion: What you mean "Could be worse"? Matthias: Well, you ...
Brian: Well, why don't you go and tell him you want to be a leper again? Ex-Leper: Uh, I could do that sir, yeah. Yeah, I could do that I suppose. What I was thinking was I was going to ask him if he could make me a bit lame in one leg during the mid...
Lynn Bracken: There's blood on your jacket. Is that an integral part of your job? Bud White: Sometimes. Lynn Bracken: Do you enjoy it? Bud White: When they deserve it. Lynn Bracken: Did they today? Bud White: I don't know. Lynn Bracken: But you did i...
Constance Harraway: The TA just finished transcribing all the governor's radio and TV comments. Listen to this gem: Journalist - "Governor, don't you think three executions in one week is a little excessive?" Governor - "I say let's bring them in, st...
[Gauri is walking away in tears, Bhuvan shouts after her] Bhuvan: Hey Gauri! There's only one house in the village with a neem tree in the yard. There's also a big field beside it. There's some chickens, two cows, and three goats. And I know whose ho...
Gauri: You think I don't see which way the Ganges is flowing? Bhuvan: Oh, pity me, I feel the pain of the scorpion's sting. You're jealous! Gauri: [gasps] Why should I be jealous? Jealousy is beneath me. Bhuvan: You're jealous, and I know who you're ...
Eowyn: Why are you doing this? The war lies to the East. You cannot leave on the eve of battle. [pause] Eowyn: You cannot abandon the men. Aragorn: Eowyn... Eowyn: We need you here. Aragorn: Why have you come? Eowyn: Do you not know? Aragorn: It is b...
Pumbaa: Hey, Timon, ever wonder what those sparkly dots are up there? Timon: Pumbaa, I don't wonder; I know. Pumbaa: Oh. What are they? Timon: They're fireflies. Fireflies that, uh... got stuck up on that big bluish-black thing. Pumbaa: Oh, gee. I al...
Humbert Humbert: You know, I've missed you terribly. Lolita Haze: I haven't missed you. In fact, I've been revoltingly unfaithful to you. Humbert Humbert: Oh? Lolita Haze: But it doesn't matter a bit, because you've stopped caring anyway. Humbert Hum...
Ursula: Oh, and there is one more thing. We haven't discussed the subject of payment. You can't get something for nothing, you know. Ariel: But I don't have any. Ursula: I'm not asking much. Just a token really, a trifle. You'll never even miss it. W...
Judge: Monsieur le maire, I know you to be a kind man, but this... Jean Valjean: A kind? A kind man? When I was in prison I was as ignorant and mean and devious as these men here, but not kind. And I wish I could keep my mouth shut and let this poor ...
Léon: There was someone a long time ago. Before I came to the States. Her father didn't want her to see me. She was from a very respectable family. Mine was, you know, not so respectable. Her dad went nuts every time she'd take off to see me. Mathil...
Sam: This is it. Frodo: This is what? Sam: If I take one more step, it'll be the farthest away from home I've ever been. Frodo: Come on, Sam. Remember what Bilbo used to say: "It's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the r...
Jeff Costello: Who sent you? Gunman: I can't tell you that. Jeff Costello: Yet you could try to kill me. Look at me. I'll ask you just once more. Who? Name and address. Gunman: You don't know him; he's not in our league. Jeff Costello: Don't keep me ...
The Rabbi: You're unlucky and nothing more than a frame of reference for the lucky Mr. Fisher. You're unlucky, so that I may know that I am not. Unfortunately, the lucky never realised they are lucky until its too late. Take yourself for instance, ye...
[last lines] Simon Graham: [narrating] And so the days of the Samurai had ended. Nations, like men, it is sometimes said, have their own destiny. As for the American Captain, no one knows what became of him. Some say that he died of his wounds. Other...
Algren: What do you want? Katsumoto: To know my enemy. Algren: I've seen what you do to your enemies. Katsumoto: The warriors in your country do not kill? Algren: They don't cut the heads off defeated, kneeling men. Katsumoto: General Hasegawa asked ...
[Algren and Katsumoto ride up to Bagley, who sees that Algren has turned against him] Colonel Bagley: Good God... Sir, the Imperial Army of Japan demands your surrender. If you and your fellas lay down your arms, you will not be harmed. Katsumoto: Th...
Bob: It gets a whole lot more complicated when you have kids. Charlotte: It's scary. Bob: The most terrifying day of your life is the day the first one is born. Charlotte: Nobody ever tells you that. Bob: Your life, as you know it... is gone. Never t...