[first lines] Azim: He says "Christmas." So I say to him, [in Turkish] Azim: "Should we go shopping?" [English] Azim: The kid's 16. He says, "But uncle, it's Christmas."
[Archie's at bat and is almost hit by the pitcher's throws, twice] Archie Graham: Hey, ump, how 'bout a warning? Clean-shaven Umpire: Sure, kid. Watch out you don't get killed.
Gill: Look at that. Would you look at that? Filthy. Absolutely filthy. And it's all thanks to you, kid. You made it possible. Jacques! I told you not to clean! Jacques: I am ashamed.
Billy Batts: [under his breath after Tommy leaves the bar] I'll fuck him in his ass. I fucked kids like him in the can in the ass. Fuckin' trying to break up my party.
Wild Bill Wharton: [Removing his belt] You can come in here all you likes, but you'll go out on you backs. Billy the kid gon' guarantee you that.
Peter McCallister: The only flying that I ever did as a kid was in the family station wagon. It wasn't to France. We used to have to go over to Aunt Laura and Uncle Arthur's house.
Angelo Maggio: I just hate to see a good guy get it in the gut. Cpl. Buckley: You better get used to it, kid. You'll probably see a lot of it before you die.
Fedora: You got heart, kid. [about the cross] Fedora: But that belongs to me. Young Indy: It belongs to Coronado. Fedora: Coronado's dead, and so are all of his grandchildren! Young Indy: This should be in a museum!
Hogarth Hughes: Wow, my own giant robot! I am now the luckiest kid in America! This must be the biggest discovery since, I don't know, television or something!
Bellhop: And you, you don't work? Maria: I'm a doctor. I'm not practicing right now. Just taking care of the kids. Bellhop: I see, you got promoted.
Elastigirl: Settle down, are you kidding? I'm at the top of my game! I'm right up there with the big dogs! Girls, come on. Leave the saving of the world to the men? I don't think so.
Joy: Disgust, make sure Riley stands out today, but also blend in. Disgust: When I'm through, Riley will look so good all the other kids will look at their own outfits and barf.
Dr. Alan Grant: [the Triceratops] Ellie, this one was always my favorite when I was a kid. And now I've seen one, its the most beautiful thing I ever saw.
B-Movie Actress: So what do you do for a living? Harry: Uh, I'm retired. I invented dice when I was a kid. How about you do?
Mathilda: [opens rubbing alcohol over drug stash] Léon: What are you doing? Mathilda: You said no women, no kids. Who do you think this is gonna kill, junkies and monkeys?
Sulley: Hey, Mike, this might sound crazy but I don't think that kid's dangerous. Mike: Really? Well, in that case, let's keep it. I always wanted a pet that could kill me.
Joe Minaldi: [inspecting diamonds through a loupe] Any trouble? Patrick 'Patsy' Goldberg: No trouble. Kid stuff. [Pulls out a gun and shoots Joe in the eye through the loupe]
Patrick 'Patsy' Goldberg: You know what? You know, I wish I was switched when I was a kid. Noodles: What makes you think you weren't?
Cheyenne: They wanna hang me. The big, black crows. Idiots. What the hell? I'll kill anything. Never a kid. Be like killin' a priest. Catholic priest, that is.
Max Bialystock: [on "Springtime For Hitler"] ... It's practically a love-letter to Hitler! Leo Bloom: Wow. This play wouldn't run a NIGHT! Max Bialystock: A night? Are you kidding? This play's guaranteed to close on PAGE FOUR!
John Mason: I'm sure all this will make a great bed time story to tell your kid. Stanley Goodspeed: You're insane, Mason. The kid'll have nightmares. I'll spend all my money on shrinks.
