I just took [my cancer diagnosis] as bad luck, basically. It did strike me almost immediately, my atheist sort of thing kicked in and I thought "ha, if I was a God-botherer, I'd be thinking, why me God? What have I done to deserve this?" and I though...
I was raised the old-fashioned way, with a stern set of moral principles: Never lie, cheat, steal or knowingly spread a venereal disease. Never speed up to hit a pedestrian or, or course, stop to kick a pedestrian who has already been hit. From which...
My son, Jett, is two, and when I was pregnant my nose got bigger, so I got a new one. Everything was bigger for a while after having Jet, but I knew I needed to be able to walk up my stairs without being winded. It took me two years to lose 60 lbs - ...
I never had a desire to hurt anybody. I have at certain times had violent urges, but I don't think I ever have hurt anybody. Tried to a couple times, but I don't think I have. Yeah, guess I have. In high school. I was dirty then. Kick 'em. I might no...
I have never been one for musicians. I know girls are supposed to go crazy for frontmen who close their eyes when they sing and nod their heads when the drums kick in, but I'm like Shania Twain with that stuff: That don't impress me much. I'll take w...
Lennie Pike: [after Smiler Grogan literally kicks the bucket] That guy's dead. You better believe it. Benjy Benjamin: Oh, I believe it all right, but if he jumps up again like he did before, I'm gonna get the hell out of here.
Clark: We're kicking off our fun old fashion family Christmas by heading out into the country in the old front-wheel drive sleigh to embrace the frosty majesty of the winter landscape and select that most important of Christmas symbols. Audrey: We're...
Rayon: I'm Rayon. Ron Woodroof: Congratulations. Now fuck off and go back to your bed. Rayon: Relax, I don't bite. I guess you're handsome, in a Texas, hick, white trash, dumb kind of way. Ron Woodroof: Get the fuck out of here, whatever you are, bef...
Margo: Hello? Cookies for sale! Gru: Go away, I'm not home! Margo: Uh, yes, you are. I heard you. Gru: No, you didn't. This... is a recording. Margo: [scoffs] No, it isn't. Gru: Yes, it is. Watch this. Leave a message. Beep! [Edith kicks the door, ca...
Otto: You know your problem? You don't like winners. Archie: Winners? Otto: Yeah. Winners. Archie: Winners, like North Vietnam? Otto: Shut up. We didn't lose Vietnam. It was a tie! Archie: [going into a cowboy-like drawl] I'm tellin' ya baby, they ki...
Gavroche: Little people know, when little people fight, we may look easy pickings, but we've got some bite. So never kick a dog because it's just a pup! We'll fight like twenty armies, and we won't give up! So you better run for cover, when the pup g...
Zebulon Gant: [shouting loudly] Right, you little bastards! You will stand up straight or I will personally shit kick every far eastern buttock that appear before me eyes! Algren: Well done, sergeant. Zebulon Gant: When you understand the language, s...
Wally the Caretaker: You're not allowed in here - who are you? Do I know you? John Anderton: [in disguise, grabs Wally by the collar] Listen, Wally - I like you. So, I don't wanna have to kick you or hit you with anything hard, but only if you promis...
[Frank Drebin is emptying out his files after being kicked off the force] Frank: Hey! The missing evidence in the Kelner case! My God, he really was innocent! Ed: He went to the chair two years ago, Frank. Frank: Well, uh... [Frank Drebin quickly sho...
Peter Gibbons: Let me ask you something. When you come in on Monday and you're not feeling real well, does anyone ever say to you, "Sounds like someone has a case of the Mondays?" Lawrence: No. No, man. Shit, no, man. I believe you'd get your ass kic...
Inigo Montoya: Where is this Count Rugen now, so I may kill him? Fezzik: He's in the castle with the prince. But the castle gate is guarded by thirty men. Inigo Montoya: [angrily kicks a stool, then calms down] How may do you think you could handle? ...
Jiminy Cricket: [arrives at the billiard hall on Pleasure Island] Pinocchio! So this is where I find you! How do you ever expect to be a real boy? Look at yourself. Smoking! Playing pool! [angrily kicks a billiard ball next to him, only to hurt his f...
Donkey: I'll find those stairs. I'll whip their butt, too. Those stairs won't know which way they're going... take drastic steps, kick it to the curb. Don't mess wit' me. I'm the Stair Master. I've mastered the stairs. I wish I had a step right here,...
everyone: [singing] Thank God we live in this quiet, little, pissant, redneck, podunk, jerkwater, greenhorn, one-horse, mudhole, peckerwood, right-wing, whistle-stop, hobnail, truck-driving, old-fashioned, hayeseed, inbred, unkempt, out-of-date, whit...
Jordan Belfort: After 15 years in storage, the lemons had developed a delayed fuse. It took 90 minutes for these fuckers to kick in but once they did POW, and I had skipped the tingle phase and jumped straight to the drool phase. These little bastard...
[Bruce has been arrested] Chinese Police Officer: [in Mandarin] He refuses to give his name. Chinese Police Officer: Fool, what the hell do I care what your name is? You're a criminal. Bruce Wayne: [in Mandarin] I'm not a criminal! Chinese Police Off...
