[first lines] Bert: All right, ladies an' gents! Comical poem! Suitable for the occasion, extemporized and thought up before your very eyes! All right, 'ere we go! [sings] Bert: Room 'ere for everyone. Gather around. [speaks] Bert: The constable - re...
Vinny Gambini: [about his secondhand suit, which has an 18th-century look and is red] I bought a suit. You seen it. Now it's covered in mud. This town doesn't have a one hour cleaner so I had to buy a new suit, except the only store you could buy a n...
Capt. Jack Aubrey: Do you see those two weevils Doctor? Dr. Stephen Maturin: I do. Capt. Jack Aubrey: Which would you choose? Dr. Stephen Maturin: Neither. There is not a scrape of difference between them they are the same species of curculio. Capt. ...
Frank: I'm telling ya, the answer's up there in Ludwig's office. Call it what you will. A hunch, woman's intuition. That guy Ludwig knows a lot more than he's telling us. Ed: A hunch won't stand up in court, Frank. Where are your hard facts? Frank: L...
Steven Connolly: [throws cigarette] They're going to expel me now! Sheba Hart: No, they won't. I'll get the blame if she tells. Steven Connolly: As if she won't! Sheba Hart: She - likes me, she might not. Steven Connolly: She likes you, huh? Like tha...
The Wolf: You must be Jules, which would make you Vincent. Let's get down to brass tacks, gentlemen. If I was informed correctly, the clock is ticking, is that right, Jimmie? Jimmie: Uh, one hundred percent. The Wolf: Your wife... Bonnie comes home a...
Sol Robeson: Have you met Archimedes? The one with the black spots, you see? You remember Archimedes of Syracuse, eh? The king asks Archimedes to determine if a present he's received is actually solid gold. Unsolved problem at the time. It tortures t...
[first lines] Pan: A long time ago, in the underground realm, where there are no lies or pain, there lived a Princess who dreamed of the human world. She dreamed of blue skies, soft breeze, and sunshine. One day, eluding her keepers, the Princess esc...
[first lines] Young Elizabeth: [singing] Yo, ho, yo, ho/ a pirate's life for me/ Yo, ho, yo, ho/ it's a pirate's life for me/drink up me hearties, yo, ho... Mr. Gibbs: [surprises her by coming up from behind her] Quiet, missy! Cursed pirates sail the...
Glen: How many Polacks it take to screw up a lightbulb? H.I.: I don't know, Glen. One? Glen: Nope, it takes three. [Glen laughs. H.I. doesn't] Glen: Wait a minute, I told it wrong. Here, I'm startin' over: How come it takes three Polacks to screw up ...
Frank Stark: We give you love and affection, don't we? Well, then, what is it? Was it because we went to that party? Well, you know what kind of drunken brawls those kind of parties turn into. It's not a place for kids. Mrs. Carol Stark: A minute ago...
Shaun: Well maybe one should do the other, and then do themselves. Liz: Oh maybe you should do me, I'll only muck it up if I have to do myself. [Shaun mimes shooting Liz and then himself, to see how it feels] Shaun: You know, I don't think I've got i...
James T. Kirk: I watched you open fire in a room full of unarmed Starfleet officers. You killed them in cold blood. Khan: Marcus took my crew from me! James T. Kirk: You are a murderer! Khan: He used my friends to control me. I tried to smuggle them ...
Prem Kumar: [starting lines] So Jamal, tell me something about yourself. Jamal Malik: I work in a call centre in Juhu. Prem Kumar: Phone basher! And what type of call centre would that be? Jamal Malik: XL5 mobile phones. Prem Kumar: Ohh... so you're ...
Leonard 'Bones' McCoy: I may throw up on ya. James T. Kirk: I think these things are pretty safe. Leonard 'Bones' McCoy: Don't pander to me, kid. One tiny crack in the hull and our blood boils in thirteen seconds. Solar flare might crop up, cook us i...
Captain Shakespeare: [whispers] Yvaine... I know what you are. [Yvaine starts] Captain Shakespeare: Have no fear, no-one on this vessel will harm you, but there are plenty who would... Your emotions give you away, Yvaine. You must learn to control th...
Chef: [singing] Everything worked out what a happy end. Americans and Canadians are friends again. So let's all join hands and knock oppression down. Cartman, Kyle, Stan: Don't you know our little lives are now complete? Mrs. Cartman, Sheila Brofl...
Buzz Lightyear: Woody, stop this nonsense and let's go. Woody: Nah, Buzz. [sigh] Woody: I can't go. I can't abandon these guys. They need me to get into this museum. Without me, they'll go back into storage. Maybe forever. Buzz Lightyear: Woody, you'...
Yochabel: Why have you come here? Bithiah: Because Moses will come here. Yochabel: My son? Bithiah: No, my son! That's all he must know. Yochabel: My lips might deny him, Great One, but my eyes never could. Bithiah: You will leave Goshen, you and you...
Combo: But I've got one question to ask you. Do you consider yourself English, or Jamaican? [There's a long uneasy silence, as Milky looks around nervously to the rest of his friends... ] Milky: [eventually] English. Combo: Lovely, lovely, love you f...
Rooster Cogburn: If he is not in a shallow grave somewhere between here and Fort Smith he is gone. Long gone! Thanks to Mr. LaBeouf, we have missed our shot. He barked and the birds have flown. Gone. Gone. Gone! Lucky Ned and his cohort gone. Your fi...