Private Joker: [narrating] Graduation is only a few days away, and the recruits of Platoon 3092 are salty. They are ready to eat their own guts and ask for seconds. The drill instructors are proud to see that we are growing beyond their control. The ...
Life is just like the game of poker, you never know what cards you will get. Sitting against the people, you can either win with the king or live on a joker. Many times in life you are forced to play the blind bet, and achieve overwhelming success, w...
It's the superhero problem . . . .Superpowers make everything personal. Batman versus Joker. Fantastic Four versus Galactus. The Big G might be the Devourer of Worlds, but in the end he's just a dude. Beat him and the problem goes away. But the real ...
The Joker: I had a vision, of a world without Batman. The mob ground out a little profit and the police tried to shut them down, one block at a time. And it was so... boring. I've had a change of heart. I don't want Mr. Reese spoiling everything, but...
Two-Face: The joker chose me! Batman: Because you were the best of us. He wanted to prove that even someone as good as you could fall. Two-Face: And he was right. Batman: You're the one pointing the gun, Harvey. So point it at the people responsible....
Happy: [after cracking open the bank's safe] They wired this thing up with, like, 5,000 volts. What kind of bank does that? Grumpy: A mob bank. I guess the Joker is as crazy as they say. Where's the alarm guy? Happy: Boss told me, when the guy was do...
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: What is this Mickey Mouse shit? What in the name of Jesus H. Christ are you animals doing in my head? Why is Private Pyle out of his bunk after lights-out? Why is Private Pyle holding that weapon? Why aren't you stomping Pri...
I have gone around observing your activities from the outside. Because of this I have also been able to see things to which you have been blind... Every morning you have gone to work, but you have never been fully awake. Of course, you have seen the ...
Private Cowboy: Tough break for Hand Job. He was all set to get shipped out on a medical. Private Joker: What was the matter with him? Private Cowboy: He was jerkin' off ten times a day. Private Eightball: No shit. At least ten times a day. Private C...
[first lines] Bill: Do you find me sadistic? You know, I bet I could fry an egg on your head right now, if I wanted to. You know, Kiddo, I'd like to believe that you're aware enough even now to know that there's nothing sadistic in my actions. Well, ...
Roger Rabbit: [singing] My buddy's Eddie V. / A sourpuss, you'll see / But when I'm done, he'll need no gun / 'Cause a joker he will be / C-D-E-F-G-H-I / I... love to raise some Cain / Believe me, it's no strain / It feels so great to smash a plate /...
Eddie Valiant: So, how long have you known it was Doom? Jessica Rabbit: Before poor Marvin was killed, he confided in me that Judge Doom wanted to get his hands on Toontown, and he wouldn't stop at anything. Eddie Valiant: So he gave you the will for...
If a pot can multiply. One day Nasrudin lent his cooking pots to a neighbour, who was giving a feast. The neighbour returned them, together with one extra one – a very tiny pot. 'What is this?' asked Nasrudin. 'According to law, I have given you th...
Commodore Jensen: Gentlemen, these men have a special interest in Navarone. I got your radio report, but I thought perhaps you could be more specific. Squadron Leader Howard Barnsby RAAF: I'll be specific! As you can plainly see, it was ruddy awful. ...
A real problem only occurs when there are admittedly disadvantages in all courses that can be pursued. If it is discovered just before a fashionable wedding that the Bishop is locked up in the coal-cellar, that is not a problem. It is obvious to anyo...
The Joker: [over the PA] Tonight you're all gonna be part of a social experiment. Through the magic of diesel fuel and ammonium nitrate, I'm ready right now to blow you all sky high. Anyone attempts to get off their boat, you all die. Each of you has...
[the Joker has rigged two ferries to explode, one filled with prison inmates, one with ordinary people, giving each ferry one detonator and telling them they have to blow up the other, or he'll blow up both. A prisoner approaches the warden, who's ho...
Dr. King Schultz: And as if on cue, here comes the sheriff! Sheriff Bill Sharp: [Comes in tavern] Okay, boys, fun's over! Come on out. [Bill Sharp leads Schultz and Django outside while an anxious crowd watches] Sheriff Bill Sharp: Alright folks, cal...
Tex: Do you have a family back home? Billy Hayes: Yeah, a mother, father, sister and brother living in Babylon, Long Island. Tex: It's gonna be tough for them. You'll have to tell them about what you're in sooner or later. Say, how much did you pay t...
Ten derde: ze spuiten er een zoutoplossing in die zo hels smerig is dat er een bittere smaak door je mond trekt, een smaak die het resultaat lijkt van een innige samenwerking tussen Voldemort, The Joker en Satan zelf. Of nee, erger - Winnie de Poeh. ...
Bill Murray: [dying] Is that you say hello where you come from? Columbus: Oh, my God. Oh, my God, I can't believe I shot Bill Murray. Tallahassee: Mr. Murray? Bill Murray: I'm just Bill, I think, now. Tallahassee: Bill? Bill Murray: Yeah? Tallahassee...
