Max Rockatansky: [Narrating] My name is Max. My world is fire and blood. Once, I was a cop. A road warrior searching for a righteous cause. As the world fell, each of us in our own ways were broken. It was hard to tell who was more crazy... me... or ...
Director Burgess: Who's the victim? John Anderton: Somebody. Director Burgess: Who? John Anderton: [trying to remember the name] Somebody. Leo Crow. Director Burgess: Who is he? John Anderton: I have no idea! I've never heard of him! But I'm supposed...
[Trapper is guest of honor at a party celebrating his appointment as Chief Surgeon] Trapper John: ...No, no, no food, no food! Sex! I want sex! Give me some sex! [notices Hot-Lips across the mess tent] Trapper John: No, no, no, that one, the sultry b...
Johnny Boy: Y'know Joey Clams... Charlie: Yeah. Johnny Boy: ...Joey Scallops, yeah. Charlie: I know him too, yeah. Johnny Boy: ...yeah. No. No, Joey Scallops is Joey Clams. Charlie: Right. Johnny Boy: Right. Charlie: ...they're the same person! Johnn...
Malcolm X: [narrating] Like every hustler, I was trapped. Cats that hung out together trying to find a solution found nothing. Cats that might have probed space or cured cancer, West Indian Archie might haved been a mathematical genius... but we were...
[attempting to push Santa down the pipe] Shock: I think he might be too big! [she tries again, he groans] Lock: No, he's not! If he can go down a chimney... he can fit... [shoves] Lock: down... [shoves again] Lock: ...here! [Santa slides down the pip...
Police officer: Attention. Attention, citizens. Terrible news. There is still no sign of Santa Claus. Although the imposter has been shut down. It looks like Christmas will have to be cancelled this year. I repeat: The imposter has been shot down, bu...
Ellen Griswold: Clark, let's just skip the house of mud. I think Dodge City was enough fun for one day. Besides, Catherine and Eddie are expecting us. Clark: It's living history Ellen. But if you'd rather see your cousins. Personally I'd rather see a...
Jeannine: Conrad, I'm not a very good bowler, what I mean is, I'm a funny bowler. Conrad "Con" Jarrett: Oh, well we don't have to go bowling if you'd rather not. How funny are ya? Jeannine: On a scale of one to ten... about a ten. Conrad "Con" Jarret...
[Having been ditched by Pinocchio, Jiminy Cricket starts to leave Pleausre Island] Jiminy Cricket: Lampwick, hmph! Lampwick! Burns me up! After all I tried to do for him. Who's his conscience, anyway? Me or that hoodlum Lampwick? Well, I've had enoug...
[protesting Jack's arrest] Elizabeth: Commodore, I really must protest. Pirate or not, this man saved my life. Norrington: One good deed is not enough to redeem a man of a lifetime of wickedness. Jack Sparrow: Though it seems enough to condemn him. N...
Harold: [the crew has decided to stay on the ship and keep broadcasting having nowhere else to go, Harold is the last one left] I *do* have somewhere else to go [pause as crew looks at him. Quentin gives an "alright" shrug] Harold: But it's Peckham s...
General Hummel: The men of marine force recon are selected to carry out illegal operations throughout the world. When they don't come home, their families are told fairy tales about what happened to them... and denied compensation. Well, I have choke...
Jeff: I just can't figure it. He went out several times last night in the rain carrying his sample case. Stella: Well, he's a salesman, isn't he? Jeff: Well, what would he be selling at three o'clock in the morning? Stella: Flashlights. Luminous dial...
Darth Vader: Yes, Admiral? Admiral Piett: Our ships have sighted the Millennium Falcon, Lord. But it has entered an asteroid field and we can not risk... Darth Vader: [interupting] Asteroids do not concern me, Admiral. I want that ship, not excuses.
C-3PO: [on Han's escape plan] I really don't see how that is going to help! Surrender is a perfectly acceptable alternative in extreme circumstances! The Empire may be gracious enough to... [Han signals to Leia, who shuts 3PO down]
Lily Sloane: [pointing a phaser] I don't care who you're with! Get me the hell out of here! NOW! Captain Jean-Luc Picard: That's not going to be easy. Lily Sloane: Well, you'd better find a way to make it easy, soldier, or I'm going to start PUSHING ...
Max Denoff: [telling a joke to the train passengers] Woman always mess up my last name. I was with a girl the other night and she kept calling me "Getoff." She was like, "Getoff! Getoff!" I'm like, "No, it's Denoff. Denoff." She says, "No, you're fat...
Kay Eiffel: [sees Harold for the first time] Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Harold Crick: Miss Eiffel? Kay Eiffel: Your hair. Your eyes. Your fingers. Your shoes. Harold Crick: Hello. I'm Harold Crick. Kay Eiffel: I know.
[Shrek, his swamp filled with fairytale creatures, glares at Donkey] Donkey: Hey, don't look at me, I didn't invite them! Pinocchio: Oh, gosh, no one invited us! Shrek: What? Pinocchio: We were forced to come here! Shrek: By who? Little Pig: Lord Far...
C-3PO: Your Royal Highness. Princess Leia: But these are my friends. 3PO, tell them they must be set free. [C-3PO speaks with the Ewoks, they listen and shake their heads negatively] Han Solo: Somehow I got the feeling that didn't work very much.
