Narrator: Was it ticking? Airport Security Officer: Actually throwers don't worry about ticking 'cause modern bombs don't tick. Narrator: Sorry, throwers? Airport Security Officer: Baggage handlers. But, when a suitcase vibrates, then the throwers go...
Fhloston Hostess: We have twelve swimming pools, and two on the rooftop. All the restaurants are between level two and level ten. The planet Fhloston has 400 beaches, all accessible until 5 PM. Then, the airship goes higher, to offer you a better vie...
Mrs. Fox: [Kristofferson has just departed after Ash's comment] You have got twenty-nine minutes to come up with a proper apology. Ash: [snaps, gestures wildly] Me? *Me* have an apology? He gets a bandit hat? He just got here, and he gets a bandit ha...
[Jerry and an irate customer argue over a sealant that the customer had previously indicated he didn't want, after Jerry has gone off to pretend to talk to his boss] Jerry Lundegaard: Well, we've never done this before. But seeing as it's special cir...
Van Houten: Let's imagine you are racing a tortoise, the tortoise has a 10 yards lead in the start, and the time takes you to run 10 yards, the tortoise's move maybe one yard,so alright, you're faster than the tortoise but you cannot never catch it, ...
[Hobbs walks toward his office when he notices Shaw accessing his computer. He clears his throat to get Shaw's attention] Hobbs: You sure as hell ain't the I.T. guy. Deckard Shaw: One second... Hobbs: You just earned yourself a dance with the devil, ...
Nurse: I'd thought you'd be happy for Miz. Threadgood. Evelyn Couch: [Crying and very upset] Happy? Cuz she's dead? Nurse: No that she gets to go home. She just left in a yellow cab. Evelyn Couch: [Looking VERY confused] I don't understand... Nurse: ...
Tom Hagen: The Senator called, he apologized for not coming but said that you would understand; also some of the judges. They've all sent gifts. [raises his glass to the Don] Tom Hagen: Salut. [Both men are suiddenly startled by a huge roaring cheer]...
Phil: Hey commander, what's going on? State Trooper: There's nothing going on. We're closing the road. Big blizzard moving in. Phil: What blizzard? It's a couple of flakes. State Trooper: Don't you listen to the weather? We got a major storm here. Ph...
Melvin B. Tolson: Who is the judge? Samantha, Henry Lowe, James Farmer Jr., Hamilton Burgess: The judge is God. Melvin B. Tolson: Why is he God? Samantha, Henry Lowe, James Farmer Jr., Hamilton Burgess: Because he decides who wins or loses. Not...
Hendley: Come on, Roger. We all know the score here, at least... most of us do. Your idea of this escape is to... start another front, to foul up the Germans behind the lines. All right, that's fine, that's fine. But once we get passed that barbed wi...
Zero: What happened? M. Gustave: What happened, my dear Zero, is I beat the living shit out of a sniveling little runt called Pinky Bandinski, who had the gall to question my virility. Because, if there's one thing we've learned from penny dreadfuls,...
Dr. Peter Venkman: This city is headed for a disaster of biblical proportions. Mayor: What do you mean, "biblical"? Dr Ray Stantz: What he means is Old Testament, Mr. Mayor, real wrath of God type stuff. Dr. Peter Venkman: Exactly. Dr Ray Stantz: Fir...
Dr. Egon Spengler: There's something very important I forgot to tell you. Dr. Peter Venkman: What? Dr. Egon Spengler: Don't cross the streams. Dr. Peter Venkman: Why? Dr. Egon Spengler: It would be bad. Dr. Peter Venkman: I'm fuzzy on the whole good/...
Steve Dunham: I thought you were going to the match. Pete Dunham: Well, technically, yes. But, what happened was me and the boys got in a bit of a drinking session last night. One thing lead to another... Steve Dunham: Let me guess. You've lost your ...
Hal: [after Del's execution] WHAT IN THE BLUE FUCK WAS THAT? There's puke all over the floor up there. And that smell! I had Van Hayes open both doors but that smell's not going out for five damn years that's what I'm bettin'. And that asshole, Whart...
Chiaki Mamiya: [the teacher Fukushima has arrived late] It's our lucky day Makoto Konno: No, It's my lucky day Chiaki Mamiya: And that, Why? Makoto Konno: [Voice-over] People say that when you have a bad day, nothing will go fine. But that is not for...
Martin Vanger: I apologize for my mother's behavior. Mikael Blomkvist: I'm used to it. Martin Vanger: It has nothing to do with you. It's between her and Henrik. She lost it when my father died. And her drinking and her... it got so bad Henrik took m...
Masterpiece Video Clerk: [smiling] Hello, welcome to Masterpiece Video. How may I help you this afternoon, sir? Masterpiece Video Customer: I'm looking for a copy of 8 1/2. Masterpiece Video Clerk: Is that a new release, sir? Masterpiece Video Custom...
Luna Lovegood: Harry, wait, I need to talk to you. Harry Potter: I'm a bit preoccupied at the moment, Luna. Luna Lovegood: You won't find it where you're going, you're wasting your time. Harry Potter: We'll talk later, ok? Luna Lovegood: Harry! Harry...
Hermione: Beautiful day. Ron: Gorgeous. Unless of course you've been ripped to pieces. Harry: Ripped to pieces? What are you talking about? Hermione: Ronald has lost his rat. Ron: I haven't lost anything! Your cat killed him! Hermione: Rubbish! Ron: ...
