Max Bialystock: Don't you see, darling Bloom, glorious Bloom? It's so simple. STEP ONE: We find the worst play ever written, a surefire flop. STEP TWO: I raise a million bucks. Lots of little old ladies out there. STEP THREE: You go back to work on t...
Jellon Lamb: Forgive me, sir, but I've been stuck here with no one but this sorry sack of Hibernian pig shit for conversation. Poor, poor Dan O'Reilly. Sit, sir. Drink with me. [Charlie cocks his gun and points it to Lamb] Charlie Burns: One more cra...
Patton: Men, all this stuff you've heard about America not wanting to fight, wanting to stay out of the war, is a lot of horse dung. Americans traditionally love to fight. All real Americans love the sting of battle. When you were kids, you all admir...
Mary Elizabeth: Charlie, Charlie, what do you think about high school? Charlie: High school? Bullshit. The cafeteria is called the Nutrition Center; people wear their letter jackets even when it's 98 degrees out. And why do they give out letter jacke...
Mrs. John F. Kennedy: I'm sorry to hear you aren't feeling well. Rosemary Woodhouse: It's just a mouse bite. Mrs. John F. Kennedy: Perhaps you'd better have your legs tied down in case of convulsions. Rosemary Woodhouse: Yes, I suppose so. If it was ...
Roosevelt: The entire outer skin will be like this. Tyler: It's titanium, laminated with kevlar. Roosevelt: Go ahead. Shake his hand. [the robotic arm extends to shake Morton's hand] Bob Morton: Come here often? How you doin'? Bob Morton: [cringes as...
Major Tom Baxter: We're asking them. We're asking them for a new deadline. General Hummel: Put the phone down. Major Tom Baxter: The men are falling apart! General Hummel: The men are Marines! Major Tom Baxter: Are they? [Hummel is silent] Major Tom ...
FBI Director Womack: Great job, Goodspeed. Agent Paxton: Why don't you throw in a trip to Tahiti while you're at it? FBI Agent: Okay, I'll deliver this to the Attorney General... FBI Director Womack: [Interrupts and takes the contract from Hunt] Ah, ...
Mr. Blonde: Listen kid, I'm not gonna bullshit you, all right? I don't give a good fuck what you know, or don't know, but I'm gonna torture you anyway, regardless. Not to get information. It's amusing, to me, to torture a cop. You can say anything yo...
Mr. Pink: We still gotta get outta here. Mr. Blonde: We're gonna sit here and wait. Mr. White: For what, the cops? Mr. Blonde: Nice Guy Eddie. Mr. Pink: Nice Guy Eddie? What makes you think he isn't on a plane half way to Costa Rica? Mr. Blonde: 'Cau...
Irving Radovich: Hey, er, anybody ever tell you you're a dead ringer for... [Joe kicks him under the table] Irving Radovich: Ow! Well, I guess I'll be going! Joe Bradley: Oh, don't do a thing like that, Irving. Sit down, join us, join us. Irving Rado...
[last lines] Tatiana: [removes ring and hands it to Bond] Here you are. In case you ever need it again. James Bond: Oh, yes. All government property has to be accounted for. But as I said before, we won't always be working on the company's time. Will...
Joey Gazelle: You know... I used to know this kid. His old man was a real fucking piece of shit. Always drunk. Always smacking him and his mom around. This kid... he takes his licks and he waits this old fucking prick out. And on the morning of his f...
[Luke can't levitate his X-Wing out of the bog] Luke: I can't. It's too big. Yoda: Size matters not. Look at me. Judge me by my size, do you? Hmm? Hmm. And well you should not. For my ally is the Force, and a powerful ally it is. Life creates it, mak...
Doyle: Now get the fuck out now before I get too mad to turn back! Terence: What about our instruments? Doyle: Come here, you little prick. Come here, you little fucking prick! [Wheels him right into the door] Doyle: Get out! All y'all, get the fuck ...
Holographic Doctor: Please state the nature of the medical emergency. Dr. Beverly Crusher: Twenty Borg are about to break through that door. We need time to get out of here! Create a diversion! Holographic Doctor: This isn't part of my program! I'm a...
Jack: Yo! Yo! Here's my boy! Here's my boy! But who's your daddy? Now who is your daddy? Miles Raymond: Put me down, Jack. Jack: I'm so proud of you! Let me love you! So tell me everything. Details. I like details. Miles Raymond: No. Jack: What? Mile...
Mary: (Speaking of a new computer, a gift) From Mr. Stephens... That was him on the phone just now. He was calling to see how you were. Nicole: Who's Mr. Stephens? Sam: Uh, he's a lawyer. He's our lawyer. Nicole: You and Mom have a lawyer? Sam: Well,...
[Holmes and Watson are searching Riordan's house] Sherlock Holmes: There's one odor I can't put my finger on. Is it candy floss, molasses...? Ah! Barley sugar. [Watson turns around to see two goons enter, one holding a... ] Dr. John Watson: ...Toffee...
Teddy Daniels: So, what's our next move? Chuck Aule: You tell me. Teddy Daniels: I gotta get off this rock, Chuck. Get back to the mainland. Whatever the hell's going on here, it's bad. [pause] Teddy Daniels: [sotto voce] Don't worry, partner, they'r...
Darth Vader: You cannot hide forever, Luke. Luke: I will not fight you. Darth Vader: Give yourself to the Dark Side. It is the only way you can save your friends. Yes, your thoughts betray you. Your feelings for them are strong. Especially for... sis...