Louis Winthorpe III: Randolph. Mortimer. Mortimer Duke: Winthorpe, my boy, what have you got for us? Louis Winthorpe III: Well, it's that time of the month again. Payroll checks for our employees, which require your signatures. And no forgetting to s...
Network Executive: Christof, what's going on? Do you know that there's a rumor circulating that he's dead? You hear me? The media is having a feeding frenzy with this, all the phone lines are jammed, and every network has a pirated shot of Marlon mak...
Senator Lothridge: Now as we discussed earlier, these warning labels are not for those who know, but rather for those who don't know. What about the children? Nick Naylor: Gentleman. It's called education. It doesn't come off the side of a cigarette ...
Scottie: What's this doohickey? Midge: It's a brassiere! You know about those things, you're a big boy now. Scottie: I've never run across one like that. Midge: It's brand new. Revolutionary up-lift: No shoulder straps, no back straps, but it does ev...
Saamiya Siddiqui: Your Honour, Prosecution Counsel Mr Zaheer Khan was very quick to... Zakir Ahmed: Zakir Ahmed... Saamiya Siddiqui: ...say that the case is as transparant as water, but Mr Zaheer Khan forgets that... Zakir Ahmed: Ms Saamiya Siddiqui,...
Dorothy: Your Majesty, if you were king, you wouldn't be afraid of anything? Cowardly Lion: Not nobody! Not nohow! Tin Woodsman: Not even a rhinoceros? Cowardly Lion: Imposerous! Dorothy: How about a hippopotamus? Cowardly Lion: Why, I'd thrash him f...
Vermin: [getting off the train at Union Square] Where is everybody? Rembrandt: Looks like we're the first ones here. We're gonna hafta sit and wait... They'll show up. Vermin: Ooooo, looks like something else showed up. Cochise: Hey, hey, hey. Now lo...
Bromhead: Chard. One of my men - Hook - do you know him? Lieutenant John Chard: [preoccupied] No. Bromhead: In the hospital, malingering under arrest. He's a thief, a coward and an insubordinate barrack room lawyer. And you've given him a rifle! Lieu...
Dr. Rothberg: But if you don't come back to the hospital, you're condemning yourself to a terrible death. Your heart won't work anymore. You'll die, asphyxiated. It's an awful death, Paul. You can't imagine it. At least here we can help you to ... Pa...
Lindsey Brigman: [relaying what Bud types] Have some new friends down here. Guess they've been here awhile. They've left us alone, but it bothers them to see us hurting each other. Getting out of hand. They sent a message. Hope you got it. Catfish De...
Russell Hammond: [high on acid; laughingly, to Dick] Look at him, he's taking notes with his eyes. [Violently grabs William and shouts to his face] Russell Hammond: How do we know you're not a cop, huh? The enemy! Stop fucking looking at me! Dick Ros...
Reverend Harper: Have you ever tried to persuade him that he wasn't Teddy Roosevelt? Abby Brewster: Oh, no. Martha Brewster: Oh, he's so happy being Teddy Roosevelt. Abby Brewster: Oh... Do you remember, Martha, once, a long time ago, we thought if h...
Real Harvey: [the real Harvey Pekar introduces his on-screen character] OK. This guy here, he's our man, all grown up and going nowhere. Although he's a pretty scholarly cat, he never got much of a formal education. For the most part, he's lived in s...
Howard Hughes: No, wait! Honey, you can't move! You can't move, you're safe here! You're in the germ-free zone now, y'understand? Ava Gardner: I'll take my chances. Howard Hughes: No, no! Honey, wait... wait, uh... [Ava removes the string barriers fr...
Col. Mathieu: The word "torture" doesn't appear in our orders. We've always spoken of interrogation as the only valid method in a police operation directed against unknown enemies. As for the NLF, they request that their members, in the event of capt...
Col. Mathieu: We need to have the Kasbah at our disposal. We have to sift through it and interrogate everyone. And that's where we find ourselves hindered by a conspiracy of laws and regulations that continue to operate as if Algiers were a holiday r...
Elwood: We're so glad to see so many of you lovely people here tonight. And we would especially like to welcome all the representatives of Illinois's law enforcement community that have chosen to join us here in the Palace Hotel Ballroom at this time...
[In his second college-age timeline, Evan realizes that he has to be unkind to the fraternity pledges, because other fraternity members are watching them] Evan: Give me the Greek alphabet. Give it to me! "Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh?" Alpha, beta, gamma, ...
The Dude: Fuckin' Quintana... that creep can roll, man. Walter Sobchak: Yeah, but he's a pervert, Dude. The Dude: Yeah. Walter Sobchak: No, he's a sex offender. With a record. He served 6 months in Chino for exposing himself to an eight year old. The...
Maude Lebowski: Does the female form make you uncomfortable, Mr. Lebowski? The Dude: Uh, is that what this is a picture of? Maude Lebowski: In a sense, yes. My art has been commended as being strongly vaginal which bothers some men. The word itself m...
Hamish: There's somebody coming. Campbell: MacGregors from the next clan. MacGregor: We heard about what was happenin' and don't want you "Amadans" thinkin' you can have your fun without us. William Wallace: Go home. Some of us are in this; can't hel...
