Jane: Are you lost? The Unmarried Mother: No I'm looking for someone. Thanks, I'll just wait. Jane: Well, you know what they say about good things happening to those who wait. The Unmarried Mother: But only the things left behind by those who hustle ...
Quentin: Your mother is dropping by to pay us a visit before Christmas. 'Young' Carl: You're kidding? When does she arrive? Quentin: Tomorrow. She was always very impromptu. Anyway, I thought you might like to know, in case you want to brush your hai...
Correspondent: General, we're told of wonder weapons the Germans were working on: Long-range rockets, push-button bombing weapons that don't need soldiers. What's your take on that? Patton: Wonder weapons? My God, I don't see the wonder in them. Kill...
Kitty Fane: For God's sake, Walter, will you stop punishing me? Do you absolutely despise me? Walter Fane: No. I despise myself. Kitty Fane: Why? Walter Fane: For allowing myself to love you once. [Walter turns away and Kitty leaves the room and clos...
Walter Fane: Do you like flowers? Kitty Fane: Not particularly, no. Well, I mean yes, but we don't really have them around the house. Mother says, "Why purchase something you can grow for free?" Then, we don't really grow them either. It does silly r...
Patrick: Hey, Sam. Sam: Question. Could the bathrooms here be anymore disgusting? Patrick: Yes, they call it the men's room. Sam: So, I finally got a hold of Bob. Patrick: Party tonight? Sam: He's still trying to shag that waitress from the Olive Gar...
Pink: [singing] Are there any queers in the audience tonight? Get 'em up against the wall! That one in the spotlight, he don't look right! Get him up against the wall! And that one looks Jewish... and that one's a coon! Who let all this riff raff int...
Marion: Well, Jones, at least you haven't forgotten how to show a lady a good time. Indiana: Boy, you're something! Marion: Yeah? I'll tell you what; Until I get back my five thousand dollars, you're gonna get more than you bargained for. I'm your go...
John T. Chance: Got any new men with you, Pat? Pat Wheeler: Nah, nobody 'cept Colorado, here. John T. Chance: Where'd you take him on? Pat Wheeler: Fort Worth John T. Chance: What does he do? Colorado Ryan: I speak English, sheriff. If you wanna ask ...
Rosemary Woodhouse: [crying] I *won't* have an abortion! Joan Jellico, Rosemary's Girlfriend: But nobody's telling you to have an abortion! Elise Dunstan: Rosie, a pain like that is a clear sign that something is not right. We just want you to get an...
RoboCop: [seeing Emil drawing his machine gun on him and draws his own gun] Drop it! [Emil walks backwards] RoboCop: Dead or alive, you're coming with me. [Emil realizes who RoboCop really is, for he had heard that statement earlier] Emil: I know you...
Jim Stark: [sitting down, hugging his father's legs helplessly] Help me! Frank Stark: Look, Jim. You can depend on me. Trust me. Whatever comes, we'll, we'll fix it together. I swear it. Now Jim, stand up. I'll stand up with you. I'll try and be as s...
Captain Darrow: Excuse me, general... but what about the fucking money? General Hummel: There is no fucking money. The mission's over. Captain Frye: Bullshit it's over! Major Tom Baxter: You're talking to a General, soldier! Maintain discipline. Capt...
Harry Goldfarb: [Harry has just found out that Sara is on diet pills] Does he give you pills? Sara Goldfarb: Of course he gives me pills. He's a doctor! Harry Goldfarb: What kind of pills? Sara Goldfarb: Oh... erm... a blue one, a purple one... and a...
Nice Guy Eddie: Ain't that a sad sight, Daddy, the man walks in the prison a white man, walks out talkin' like a fuckin' nigger. You know what, I think it's all that black semen been pumped up your ass so far, now it's backed into your fuckin brain, ...
Joe Bradley: [after swimming ashore] All right? Princess Ann: Fine. How are you? Joe Bradley: Oh, fine! [they laugh] Joe Bradley: Say, you know, you were great back there. Princess Ann: You weren't so bad yourself. Joe Bradley: [kisses her] Well... I...
Sheriff of Nottingham: Well, greetings from your friendly neighborhood tax collector. Otto: Oh, take it easy on me, Sheriff. What with this busted leg and all, I'm way behind on my work, Sheriff. Sheriff of Nottingham: I know, Otto, but you're way be...
[In a telephone booth with the door closed] Raymond: Uh oh fart. Uh oh fart. Charlie: Did you fart, Ray? Did you fucking fart? Raymond: Fart. Charlie: [Trying unsuccessfully to open the door] How can you stand that? Raymond: I don't mind it. Charlie:...
Charlie: Now casinos have house rules: they don't like to lose. So you never show that you're counting cards. That is *the* cardinal sin, Ray. Raymond: Counting cards is bad. Charlie: Yes. Raymond: I like to drive slow on the driveway. Charlie: If yo...
Charlie: [talking to the woman who answers the door] I'm sorry ma'am, I lied to you. I'm very sorry about that. That man right there is my brother and if he doesn't get to watch 'People's Court' in about 30 seconds, he's gonna throw a fit right here ...
[Raymond blows their ruse to get into a farmhouse to watch The People's Court] Charlie: That's it. You blew it. You don't get to see your program. Finished. Raymond: One minute to Wapner. Charlie: Yes, one minute to Wapner. I had you in there, Ray! Y...
