Love your wife, your servant and your enemy equally, and file her credit card bills under the ‘enemy’ folder.
I replaced my wife with an empty chair, so I wouldn’t be poisoned at dinner. And I’m still alive, so I’d say it was a genius tactical strategy.
He would say things like, “But you are my wife!” when I didn’t do something that he wanted me to do. His expectations were not realistic.
When my now ex wife said she wanted a separation, I was horrified. So I said, “You want me to wear a condom?!
Never trust a man with a lunatic wife in an attic," Richard told me. "And anyone named Heathcliff should make you suspicious.
In India there’s no modernism without barbarism. Strip away the young man’s face and you’ll find an old man’s mind.
They had a saying: An Arab loves in the order of: his son, his camel, and his wife - but there were times when one was allowed to take precedence over the other!
How I should despise such a thing if I were a man. What a nose she has! what a chin! what a neck! Then her eyes--and the worst kissing lips in the universe.
They had as good a shot at making it as anyone did, but what if marriage didn't solve anything and didn't save anyone even a little bit? What then?
I’m glad the government can’t tax love, because I’d owe them a lot of it. And I’d be forced to tell them how much my ex wife stole.
I built my ex wife a Castle of Love, and she dug a moat and filled it with sharks and lawyers. Oh well, at least I got to keep the unicorn.
If you have always suspected your sister of an inclination to madness, it will be my pleasure to confirm your worst fears.
To me, love is either a pebble, a rock, or a boulder. Or a grain of sand, if you’re trying to measure the love my ex wife had for me.
Keep your wife happy by living in a slightly nicer house than your neighbor. And you can do this by living in a poorer neighborhood than you ever imagined.
...fear and pain are immediate, and that, when they're gone, we're left with the concept, but not the true memory--why else...would anyone give birth more than once?
Believe me, Doctor, if your life ends in suddenness you will be glad it did, and if it does not you will wish it had. You will want suddenness, Doctor.
Don't you think it's better to be extremely happy for a short while, even if you lose it, than to be just okay for your whole life?
The only thing we can do is to say ‘Fuck it’ over and over again, really loud, until someone stops us.
No matter how grave the secret, how imperative absolute silence, someone would always feel the urge to confess, and an unleashed secret is a terrible force.
in a male-dominated world, Reich suggested, there was an “economic interest” in the continued role of women as “the provider of children for the state” and the performer of household chores without pay.
Thank God (my wife) and I were both born poor so the concept of fidelity was allowed to take root in us.
