Jack Crabb: General, you go down there. General Custer: You're advising me to go into the Coulee? Jack Crabb: Yes sir. General Custer: There are no Indians there, I suppose. Jack Crabb: I didn't say that. There are thousands of Indians down there. An...
Olive: [going over eye test pamphlets] Mom, Dwayne's got 20/20 vision! Sheryl: I bet he does... Olive: Now, let's see if you're colorblind. [opens the pamphlet] Olive: What's the letter in the circle? [Dwayne looks confused] Olive: No in the circle. ...
Jack Valentine: Since you're so concerned with the law, you must know that I am legally permitted to hold you for 24 hours without charging you. You might ask why I would do that, and I can assure you it's not because I enjoy your company, because I ...
Jonathan Mardukas: Did she hurt you, Jack? Jack Walsh: Yeah, she did. Jonathan Mardukas: I'm sorry. Jack Walsh: What're you sorry about? Jonathan Mardukas: I'm sorry you're hurt. Jack Walsh: I'm not hurt. Jonathan Mardukas: You just said you were hur...
Howard Beale: Right now, there is a whole, an entire generation that never knew anything that didn't come out of this tube. This tube is the gospel, the ultimate revelation; this tube can make or break presidents, popes, prime ministers; this tube is...
Peter Gibbons: It's not just about me and my dream of doing nothing. It's about all of us. I don't know what happened to me at that hypnotherapist and, I don't know, maybe it was just shock and it's wearing off now, but when I saw that fat man keel o...
Ulysses Everett McGill: The treasure is still there boys, believe me. Delmar O'Donnell: But how'd he know about the treasure? Ulysses Everett McGill: I don't know Delmar. The blind are reputed to possess sensitivities compensating for their lack of s...
Lone Watie: [realizes Josey has snuck up behind and pulled a gun on him] They said a man could get rich on reward money if he could kill you. Josey Wales: Seems like you was looking to gain some money here. Lone Watie: Actually, I was looking to gain...
Kelly: [Josie has walked into the saloon in Santa Rio] What'll you have? Josey Wales: Whiskey. Rose: [laughing] Maybe you'd like somethin' else. Josey Wales: Beer? Kelly: Been a long time since somebody ordered a drink in San Rio. Ten Spot: Been a lo...
Jack Sparrow: That's the second time I've had to watch that man sail away with my ship. Elizabeth: But you were marooned on this island before, weren't you? So we can escape in the same way you did then. Jack Sparrow: To what point and purpose, young...
Mr. Darcy: So this is your opinion of me. Thank you for explaining so fully. Perhaps these offences might have been overlooked had not your pride been hurt by my honesty... Elizabeth Bennet: *My* pride? Mr. Darcy: ...in admitting scruples about our r...
Cutter: Every great magic trick consists of three parts or acts. The first part is called "The Pledge". The magician shows you something ordinary: a deck of cards, a bird or a man. He shows you this object. Perhaps he asks you to inspect it to see if...
Patrick: You gonna do anything? Brad: What are you talking about? Patrick: I'm talking about your pet ape just tripped me. Gonna say something? Brad: Why would I? Patrick: You know why. Brad: This is pathetic, man. Your fixation on me. Patrick: Do yo...
H.I.: That night, I had a dream. I drifted off thinking about happiness, birth and new life, But now I was haunted by a vision of... He was horrible. The lone biker of apocalypse. A man with all the powers of Hell at his command. He could turn turn t...
[first lines] Charlie: [on telephone] Now it's five and a half weeks and I'm still sitting on four Lamborghinis that can't meet spot emissions standards. Now, how many times you wash out with EPA? Lenny: [on a separate line] Uh, yes sir, they're fina...
Immigration Officer #2: So where's your old man now? Tony Montana: He dead. He die. Sometime. Somewhere. Immigration Officer #2: Mother? Tony Montana: She dead too. Immigration Officer #1: What kind of work you do in Cuba, Tony? Tony Montana: Ah, you...
Mrs. Lovett: Mr. T, you didn't! [looks into the chest, sees Pirelli's dead body and gasps. Shuts it] Mrs. Lovett: You're barking mad! Killing a man what done ya no harm! Sweeney Todd: [polishing his razor] He recognized me from the old days. Tried to...
[person speaking German on "cliteris" website] Kyle: Dude, it's a lady getting pooed on! Stan: Whoa! Is it Cartman's mom? Cartman: Oh, very funny! Kyle: Hey! It IS Cartman's mom! Mrs. Cartman: [man speaking German on computer] All righty then! Cartma...
LaBoeuf: You are getting ready to show your ignorance now, Cogburn. I don't mind a little personal chaffing but I won't hear anything against the Ranger troop from a man like you.L Rooster Cogburn: How long have you boys been mounted on sheep down th...
Rooster Cogburn: If he is not in a shallow grave somewhere between here and Fort Smith he is gone. Long gone! Thanks to Mr. LaBeouf, we have missed our shot. He barked and the birds have flown. Gone. Gone. Gone! Lucky Ned and his cohort gone. Your fi...
General Ralph Landry: You know, when they forced Khruschev out, he sat down and wrote two letters to his successor. He said - "When you get yourself into a situation you can't get out of, open the first letter, and you'll be safe. When you get yourse...
