[Evelle is buying diapers] Evelle: You know how to put these things on? Grocer: Well, around the butt and up over the groin area. Evelle: I know WHERE they go, old timer. I just want to know if I need pins or fasteners. Grocer: Well, no, they got the...
Lisa: The last thing Mrs. Thorwald would leave behind would be her wedding ring. Stella, do you ever leave yours at home? Stella: The only way somebody would get that would be to chop off my - finger. Let's go down to the garden and find out what's b...
Jeff: What do you need as evidence? Bloody footprints leading up to his door? Lt. Doyle: One thing I don't need is heckling. You called me and asked for help. Now you're behaving like a taxpayer. Jeff: You know by tomorrow morning, there may not be a...
[to Margie] Ray Charles: You know what they're saying about me? Said I lost something. Said I've gone middle-of-the-road. They might as well say the same thing about you. You were the soul of this band, now every time you're around you're just drunk....
Lloyd Dobler: Okay, how ya doing? I'm Lloyd, and we're gonna watch the movie "Cocoon." I've never actually seen it, but I heard it's very good, it makes you happy, thats a good thing. It's about a group of older people who go to outer space... hope I...
Major T. J. "King" Kong: Well, I've been to one world fair, a picnic, and a rodeo, and that's the stupidest thing I ever heard come over a set of earphones. You sure you got today's codes?
The Professor: Bonjour, mesdames et monsiuers. Yesterday we have learned the correct way how to boil water. Today we will learn the correct way how to crack an egg. Voilà! An egg. Now, an egg is not a stone; it is not made of wood, it is a living th...
Captain Jean-Luc Picard: Mr. Worf... I regret some of the things I said to you earlier. Lt. Commander Worf: "Some"? Captain Jean-Luc Picard: As a matter of fact, I think you're the bravest man I have ever known. Lt. Commander Worf: Thank you, sir.
Dianne: I don't think he'd leave us, Davs. David: Wouldn't he? Lizzy, how can you put your faith in a man you spectacularly binned for being unreliable? A man whose idea of a romantic nightspot and an impenetrable fortress are the same thing? It's......
Sherlock Holmes: And chambermaids were once such a liberal breed. Constable Clark: My wife's a chambermaid, sir. [uncomfortable silence] Constable Clark: Anyhow, it's a good thing she was offended, sir. Otherwise we'd never have found you. Sherlock H...
The Emperor: I'm looking forward to completing your training. In time you will call *me* master. Luke: You're gravely mistaken. You won't convert me as you did my father. The Emperor: Oh no, my young Jedi. You will find that it is you who are mistake...
Gretchen: 18,000 dollars? Eduardo Saverin: Yes. Gretchen: In addition to the $1,000 you'd already put up? Eduardo Saverin: Yes. Gretchen: A total of $19,000 now? Eduardo Saverin: Yes. Mark Zuckerberg: Hang on. [Mark sarcastically adds up the 2 amount...
Sean Parker: You don't even know what the thing is yet. How big it can get, how far it can go. This is no time to take your chips down. A million dollars isn't cool, you know what's cool? Eduardo Saverin: [Sarcastically] You? Sean Parker: [the scene ...
Dr. Cliff Patel: Will somebody please explain me the parlay, please? Ronnie: You gotta win two bets or you lose the whole thing. For Pat Sr. to win, the Birds gotta beat the Cowboys, plus, Pat and Tiffany gotta get at least a 5 at the dance. Dr. Clif...
Hank Mitchell: When I was still just a kid, I remember my father telling me what he thought that it took for a man to be happy. Simple things, really. A wife he loves. A decent job. Friends and neighbors who like and respect him. And for a while ther...
Andy Dufresne: If they ever try to trace any of those accounts, they're gonna end up chasing a figment of my imagination. Red: Well, I'll be damned. Did I say you were good? Shit, you're a Rembrandt! Andy Dufresne: Yeah. The funny thing is - on the o...
Corporal Upham: Caparzo, is it? Private Caparzo: Hey Corporal, drop dead! Corporal Upham: Got you. Private Caparzo: And another thing, every time you salute the Captain, you make him a target for the Germans. Do us a favor. Don't do it. Especially wh...
Barto: How long have you been with the BCI now, Serpico? Frank Serpico: All my life. Barto: That's long enough to know how we do things. Frank Serpico: Barto, it's not just that. [in a sarcastic tone] Frank Serpico: You don't like me! Barto: BCI neve...
Han Solo: Look, Your Worshipfulness, let's get one thing straight. I take orders from just one person: me. Princess Leia Organa: It's a wonder you're still alive. [Pushing past Chewbacca] Princess Leia Organa: Will someone get this big walking carpet...
Computer: You've got mail. Scott Pilgrim: [Turns To Wallace] Dude, this thing claims I have mail. Wallace Wells: [groggily] It's amazing what we can do with computers these days. Scott Pilgrim: [Turns back] Dude, now I'm totally reading it. Wallace W...
Joe Turner: What does Operations care about a bunch of damn books? A book in Dutch. A book out of Venezuela. Mystery stories in Arabic. Atwood: Wait! Joe Turner: What the hell is so important about... [He stops as he sees the connection] Joe Turner: ...