The landlord: He who signs a lease must pay rent. That's the law. Max Bialystock: You miserable wretch! How dare you take the last penny out of a poor man's pocket? The landlord: I have to. I'm a landlord. Max Bialystock: [to God] Oh, Lord, hear my p...
Ángela: So besides your father, who do you live with? Jennifer: With my mommy, my daddy, and my dog Max. Ángela: Your dog isn't here either, right? I can't see him. Jennifer: No, he's not. Ángela: Do you love your dog? Jennifer: Yes. Ángela: Why ...
Bertier: Hey, Julius I was thinking we could... Ronnie "Sunshine" Bass: He's taking a shower. Bertier: What do you want, man? Ronnie "Sunshine" Bass: You know what I want. [kisses him and Gary starts trying to punch him. The team is holding Gary back...
[after being smacked in the jaw by Jackie Boy] Bozo No. 1: [about Jackie Boy] He is generous. But that temper of his... you shouldn't have picked on him like you did. My temper, you don't have to worry about. Shellie: [grabs a knife and points it at ...
Captain of Guards: [to Shrek, after finding him and Donkey in the woods] You there! Ogre! Shrek: Aye? Captain of Guards: [to both Shrek and Donkey] By the order of Lord Farquaad, I am authorized to place you both under arrest and transport you to a d...
Mason: Nicole, did the Pied Piper take the children away because he was mad that the town didn't pay him? Nicole: That's right. Mason: Well, if he knew magic, if he could get the kids into the mountain, why couldn't he use his magic pipe to make the ...
Jennifer Strunk: Would you like to meet Charlton Heston? He's our scorpion. Every night we throw in something new to him and watch him kill it. Daddy says it's like a Coliseum. Daddy says he wants to throw you into the Coliseum. George: No kidding. W...
Red: [narrating] Tommy Williams came to Shawshank in 1965 on a two-year stretch for B&E. That's breaking & entering to you. Cops caught him sneaking TV sets out the back door of a JC Penney. Young punk. Mr. Rock and Roll. Cocky as hell. Tommy William...
Marianne: When is a man to be safe from such wit if age and infirmity do not protect him? Elinor Dashwood: Infirmity? Mrs. Dashwood: If Colonel Brandon is infirm then I am at death's door. Elinor Dashwood: It is a miracle your life has extended this ...
Cartman: [after seeing Kenny's ghost] Mom I saw him, I saw Kenny! Mrs. Cartman: Oh, you poor dear! You've been through so much. Cartman: I bet him he couldn't light a fart on fire, and now he's all pissed off [gets shocked] Cartman: damn I can't say ...
Lt. Col. Frank Slade: Clear them little bottles off. And when I get off the phone here, call up Hyman and tell him I want it wall to wall with John Daniels. Charlie Simms: Don't you mean Jack Daniels? Lt. Col. Frank Slade: He may be Jack to you son, ...
Sephora: I do not know about such things, but I do know that the mountain rumbles when God is there, and the earth trembles, and the cloud is red with fire. Moses: At such a time, has any man ever gone to see Him, face-to-face? Sephora: No man has ev...
Wyatt Earp: What makes a man like Ringo, Doc? What makes him do the things he does? Doc Holliday: A man like Ringo has got a great big hole, right in the middle of him. He can never kill enough, or steal enough, or inflict enough pain to ever fill it...
Kate: I've been good to you, I've taken care of you. If you die, where does that leave me? Doc Holliday: Without a meal ticket I suppose. [Doc rides horse out of barn into stable area, Kate runs out after him punching him in anger] Kate: You bastard!...
Benny: Hey, man, you need a cab? Douglas Quaid: Well, what's wrong with this one? [points to other cabbie] Benny: [laughs] He ain't got five kids to feed. Douglas Quaid: Where's yours? Benny: Right over there man. [takes Quaid with him] Punk Cabbie: ...
Verbal: Who is Keyser Soze? He is supposed to be Turkish. Some say his father was German. Nobody believed he was real. Nobody ever saw him or knew anybody that ever worked directly for him, but to hear Kobayashi tell it, anybody could have worked for...
Withnail: Listen, I know what you're thinking but I had no alternative. The old bugger's come a long way and I didn't want to put the wind up him. Marwood: Your sensitivity overwhelms me. If you think you're going to have a weekend's indulgence up he...
Cowardly Lion: I'll get you anyway, Pee-wee. [Chases Toto; Dorothy hits him on the nose] Dorothy: Shame on you! Cowardly Lion: [Sobbing] Why did you do that for? I didn't bite him. Dorothy: No, but you tried to. It's bad enough picking on a straw man...
Patroller: [in a vain attempt to escape, Solomon runs into some patrollers who are fixing to hang a trio of slaves] Boy, where are you going? Solomon Northup: To the store, Sir, to Bartholomew's. I was sent there by Mistress Epps. Patroller: [the pat...
[while wrestling with his son] King Leonidas: In the end, a Spartan's true strength is the warrior next to him. So give respect and honor to him, and it will be returned to you. First, you fight with your head... Queen Gorgo: Then you fight with your...
[first lines] Jane Burnham: I need a father who's a role model, not some horny geek-boy who's gonna spray his shorts whenever I bring a girlfriend home from school. What a lame-o. Someone really should just put him out of his misery. Ricky Fitts: Wan...
