Uncomfortable Waitress: How are you guys doing here? Catherine: Fine. We're fine. We used to be married, but he couldn't handle me, he wanted to put me on Prozac and now he's madly in love with his laptop. Theodore: Well, if you'd heard the conversat...
King of Qin: I have just come to a realization! This scroll by Broken Sword contains no secrets of his swordsmanship. What this reveals is his highest ideal. In the first state, man and sword become one and each other. Here, even a blade of grass can...
Radagast the Brown: [looking the symbols around the tomb's door in the High Fells] These are dark spells, Gandalf. Old and full of hate. Who's buried here? Gandalf: If he had a name, it's long since been lost. He would've been known only as a servant...
Thorin Oakenshield: [after putting in the key and opening the door] Erebor. Balin: [In tears] Thorin. Thorin Oakenshield: I know these walls. These halls. This stone. Do you remember it Balin? Chambers filled with golden light. Balin: I remember. Glo...
Sorting Hat: Hmm, difficult. VERY difficult. Plenty of courage, I see. Not a bad mind, either. There's talent, oh yes. And a thirst to prove yourself. But where to put you? Harry: Not Slytherin. Not Slytherin. Sorting Hat: Not Slytherin, eh? Are you ...
Dean McCoppin: Found your pet. Hogarth Hughes: Where? Dean McCoppin: It's up my leg, man. Squirrel's in my pants, Hogarth, and it's climbing its way out of here. Hogarth Hughes: Don't wig out. Dean McCoppin: Okay, it's heading north now. I'm sorry, k...
Virginia 'Pepper' Potts: [after Stark's one night stand with Christine] I have your clothes here; they've been dry cleaned and pressed. And there's a car waiting for you outside that will take you anywhere you'd like to go. Christine Everheart: You m...
[after end credits] Tony Stark: [arriving home] Evening, JARVIS! Jarvis: [voice distorted] Welcome home, sir... [Stark stops as he sees a figure in his living room] Nick Fury: "I am Iron Man". You think you're the only superhero in the world? Mr. Sta...
Cooper: [the ranger won't take off] CASE, what's the problem? CASE: Too waterlogged. Let it drain. Cooper: GODDAMN IT! [smashes the dashboard] Brand: I told you to leave me. Cooper: And I told you to get your ass back here! Brand: Why didn't you leav...
John Hammond: Now Ellie, you can't throw the main switch by hand. You've got to pump up the primer handle in order to get the charge. Its large, flat, and gray. Dr. Ellie Sattler: OK, here I go, OK. [Ellie starts pumping the handle] Dr. Ellie Sattler...
Mrs. Kintner: Chief Brody? Brody: Yes? [Mrs. Kintner slaps Brody and sobs] Mrs. Kintner: I just found out, that a girl got killed here last week, and you knew it! You knew there was a shark out there! You knew it was dangerous! But you let people go ...
[as Brody sends the air tanks flying] Hooper: Dammit, Martin! This is compressed air! Brody: Well, what the hell kind of a knot was that? Hooper: You pulled the wrong one. You screw around with these tanks, and they're gonna blow up! Quint: Yeah, tha...
The Bride: Then give me one of these. Hattori Hanzo: They're not for sale. The Bride: I didn't say "sell me", I said "give me". Hattori Hanzo: [laughs] Why should I help you? The Bride: Because my vermin is a former student of yours. And considering ...
Elle Driver: She put a Black Mamba in his camper. [pause] Elle Driver: I got her, sweety. [pause] Elle Driver: She's dead. [pause] Elle Driver: Let me put it this way. If you ever start feeling sentimental, go to Barstow, California. When you get her...
Harry: And that's how she got to the same party as me. Oh shit. I skipped something. Damn it. This whole robot bit. I made a big deal, then I like totally forgot. Fuck, this is bad narrating. Like my dad telling a joke. "Oh, wait back up. I forgot to...
[Ted is having lunch with his boss] Ted Kramer: So the other morning, I'm at the refrigerator... you know, getting Billy ready for school. So I'm just in my underwear and he notices I've lost weight. And he comes in and pats me. He comes up to here [...
[Joanna is crying] Ted Kramer: Hi, what's up? Tell me. What? What's the matter? Joanna Kramer: I woke up this morning, kept thinking about Billy and I was thinking about him waking up in his room with his little clouds all around that I painted and I...
Keith: Wake up, Natalie. Don't you see what happened here? You had a beautiful life, and I had shit. I hated your guts. I wanted to take you down, I wanted to make you as miserable as I am, and that is exactly what I did. Now, how's that for a goodby...
Guido: I forgot to tell you. Dora: Go ahead. Guido: You can't imagine how much I feel like making love to you. But I'll never tell anyone, especially not you. They'd have to torture me to make me say it. Dora: Say what? Guido: That I want to make lov...
Merry: Why did you look? Why do you always have to look? Pippin: I don't know. I can't help it. Merry: You never can. Pippin: I'm sorry, all right? I won't do it again. Merry: Don't you understand? The enemy thinks you have the Ring. He's going to be...
Scar: [after forcing Simba to the edge of a cliff while a fire burns below] Now this looks familiar. Where have I seen this before? Hm, let me think. Oh, yes, I remember! This is just the way your father looked before he died. [He claws Simba's paws ...
