Ed, the car salesman: I'll get to the bottom of this. Davenport! Davenport: Yes, Mr. Ed? Ed, the car salesman: Mr. Griswold ordered a blue sports wagon, where is it? Davenport: I don't know sir. Ed, the car salesman: [to Clark] I know what must have ...
Car Rental Agent: [cheerfully] Welcome to Marathon, may I help you? Neal: Yes. Car Rental Agent: How may I help you? Neal: You can start by wiping that fucking dumb-ass smile off your rosey, fucking, cheeks! And you can give me a fucking automobile: ...
Ryad: One day I saw a job ad. For security guard. I didn't have a dog, so I bought one secondhand. I didn't know, so I got a rottweiler. Know what they're like? And his name was Tyson. He came with the name Tyson. He was humongous! See this? This was...
Officer Dunn: Who the fuck left Danny Boy out in the sun? [Taking a piss] Officer Dunn: Hey, Jacko, you lazy bugger, I told you to bury that bastard last night. He stinks worse than you. Jacko! Two Bob: You got the wrong fuckin' black man. Arthur Bur...
Walter Fane: I knew when I married you that you were selfish and spoiled. But I loved you. I knew you only married me to get as far away from your mother as possible. And I hoped that one day... there'd be something more. I was wrong. You don't have ...
Jake La Motta: Did you fuck my wife? Joey LaMotta: What? Jake La Motta: Did you fuck my wife? Joey LaMotta: [pauses] How do you ask me that? I'm your brother and you ask me that? Where do you get you're balls big enough to ask me that? Jake La Motta:...
Mr. Blonde: Listen, I appreciate what, you guys are doin' for me, but I was wonderin' when I can come back and, you know, do some real work. Joe: Well, that's hard to say, It's kind of a strange time now. Things are a little... Nice Guy Eddie: They'r...
Major T. J. "King" Kong: Well, boys, I reckon this is it - nuclear combat toe to toe with the Roosskies. Now look, boys, I ain't much of a hand at makin' speeches, but I got a pretty fair idea that something doggone important is goin' on back there. ...
General Jack D. Ripper: Were you ever a prisoner of war? Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Well... yes I was, matter of fact, Jack. I was. General Jack D. Ripper: Did they torture you? Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: Uh, yes they did. I was tortured by the J...
Sammy Barnathan: I don't have a resume, or a picture. I've never worked as an actor. Caden Cotard: Good. Tell me why you're here. Sammy Barnathan: Well I've been... I've been following you for twenty years. So I knew about this audition because I fol...
Hamm: All right, let's review this one more time. At precisely 8:32-ish, Exhibit A, Woody, was kidnapped. [Etch-A-Sketch draws Woody] Hamm: Exhibit B, a composide sketch of the kidnapper. [Etch-A-Sketch draws Al with a long beard] Bo Peep: He didn't ...
Eli Sunday: You are a stupid man, Abel. You've let someone come in here and walk all over us. You let him in and do his work here, and you are a stupid man for what we could have had. Abel Sunday: I followed His word, Eli. I tried. Eli Sunday: You di...
Combo: [to Sandhu, after robbing him] Picking on a kid, mate? Fucking hell. Picking on a fucking kid, was ya? Eh? Mr. Sandhu: Just take what you want and go, OK? Combo: SHUT UP! I'M talking! I'M your fucking size! Fuck with me! Mr. Sandhu: You got wh...
Governor Crittenden: Jesse James sent me a telegram last month, saying he was going to kill me if he had to wreck a train to do it. He said that once I was in his hands he was going to cut my heart out and eat it in strips like it was bacon. [pause] ...
Nick Fury: Agent Romanoff, would you escort Dr. Banner back to his... Bruce Banner: Back where? You rented my room. Nick Fury: The cell was built... Bruce Banner: In case you needed to kill me, but you can't! I know! I tried!... I got low. I didn't s...
Ray: Harry, I've got an idea. Harry: What? Ray: My room faces out the canal, right? I'm going to go back to me room, jump into the canal, see if I can swim to the other side and escape. Harry: All right. Ray: If you go outside around the corner, you ...
Celine: [Celine's song] Let me sing you a waltz / Out of nowhere, out of my thoughts / Let me sing you a waltz / About this one night stand / You were, for me, that night / Everything I always dreamt of in life / But now you're gone / You are far gon...
Lord Peter Wimsey: Facts, Bunter, must have facts. When I was a small boy, I always hated facts. Thought they were nasty, hard things, all nobs. Mervyn Bunter: Yes, my lord. My old mother always used to say... Lord Peter Wimsey: Your mother, Bunter? ...
During the act of making something, I experience a kind of blissful absence of the self and a loss of time. When I am done, I return to both feeling as restored as if I had been on a trip. I almost never get this feeling any other way. I once spent s...
I excuse myself and go to the ladies’ room. Washing my hands, I give myself a little you can do this type pep talk. When I walk out, I see him leaned up against the wall opposite the door. "Long line for the men's room?" I try to joke, moving past ...
There are times when I long to sweep away half the things I am expected to learn; for the overtaxed mind cannot enjoy the treasure it has secured at the greatest cost. ... When one reads hurriedly and nervously, having in mind written tests and exami...
