[Alone in a church, talking to God, as police lights begin flashing] Luke: Is that your answer, old man? Well, I guess you're a hard case too.
[after a customer got his hand stuck in a can of Pringles] Dante Hicks: A little word of advice, my friend. Sometimes you gotta let those hard-to-reach chips go.
John McClane: [huddled in an air vent, recalls his wife's invitation] "Come out to the coast, we'll get together, have a few laughs..."
John McClane: You'd have made a pretty good cowboy yourself, Hans. Hans Gruber: Oh, yes. What was it you said to me before? "Yippie-ki-yay, motherfucker."
FBI Agent Johnson: I'm Agent Johnson, this is Special Agent Johnson. Dwayne T. Robinson: Oh, how you doin'? FBI Agent Johnson: No relation.
Harry Ellis: Hey babe, I negotiate million dollar deals for breakfast. I think I can handle this Eurotrash.
John McClane: [Tying fire hose around his waist] Oh, John, what the fuck are you doing? How the fuck did you get into this shit?
John McClane: [after witnessing Mr. Takagi's murder] [talking to himself] John McClane: Why the fuck didn't you stop 'em, John? 'Cause then you'd be dead, too, asshole.
FBI Special Agent Johnson: Authorization? How about the United States FUCKING government? Lose the grid, or you lose your job.
John McClane: [after McClane sets off massive explosion] Is the building on fire? Sergeant Al Powell: No, but it's gonna need a paint job and a shit load of screen doors.
Theo: [sees LAPD SWAT armored vehicle approaching] Wait a minute, wait a minute. What have we here, gentlemen? The police have themselves an RV. Southeast corner.
Sir Francis Walsingham: [referring to Elizabeth] Her Majesty rules with the heart... not with the head. Mary of Guise: [smiles] Hm, I understand. It is hard for a woman to forget her heart.
Narrator: I had it all. Even the glass dishes with tiny bubbles and imperfections, proof they were crafted by the honest, simple, hard-working indigenous peoples of... wherever.
Andy: So what do you do? Frances: Eh... It's kinda hard to explain. Andy: Because what you do is complicated? Frances: Eh... Because I don't really do it.
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: Do you feel dizzy? Do you feel faint! Jesus H. Christ! I think you've got a hard-on!
Alan: [shortly after Tequila reassured Alan that the guy he shot wasn't a cop] Was that guy I shot really a cop? Tequila: Yeah. Alan: Fuck!
Johnny Wong: [Handing Alan a gun] We either conquer the world or you kill me tonight with this gun. Alan: I have my own.
Tequila: Should I salute you? Alan: You've got the gun. I'll go and milk a cow if you want. Tequila: Sorry, I don't drink milk
Rachel: He's not much to look at, but it's so hard to find a family man these days. Jennifer: Tell me about it. All of the sensitive ones get eaten.
The Bride: [after finally getting her big toe to move] Hard part's over. Now let's get these other piggies wiggling.
Union Army officer: Now get back in line before I kick you so hard you'll be wearin' your ass for a hat.
