Charlie Bucket: [as Violet blows up into a blueberry] Why won't she listen to Mr. Wonka? Grandpa Joe: Because, Charlie, she's a nitwit.
One day my grandson said to me, grandpa were you a hero in the war? And i said to him no I'm not a hero, but I have served in a company full of them.
Grandpa said I was speeding, but he drives as fast as a parked car, so anything that moves as fast as a statue is supersonic.
The world's a scary place these days. Grandpa,, you've seen worse things, haven't you? Please tell me the world has always been like this.
Love is a door leading to a better existence. But knock before entering, because behind that door I think grandpa's taking a shit.
The smell of silence looks like the ghost of my grandpa. My love is deeper than six feet of dirt, and considerably easier to shovel.
Due to unfavorable weather (or, rather, favorable), we couldn’t make love in the rain. So instead we had sex in the shower, despite grandpa taking a bath in it.
My grandpa passed a few days ago. But I’m not sad. He was only driving 20 miles an hour, so I’m sure I’ll catch up to him.
Like my grandpa, who dropped out of school to farm, I have a 4th grade education. Of course, I have a college degree, too. Both require the same reading level.
The best thing my grandpa ever said to me was, “Gladys, bring me some more damn soup.” Well, maybe he wasn’t talking to me, but it was still good to hear he was a romantic.
I love how babies look like old people. I saw a baby the other day that looked exactly like my grandpa, only taller.
The first door in the hall leads to youth, the second door leads to middle age, and the third door leads to the bathroom. But knock first, because I think grandpa’s in there.
My grandpa doesn’t even have a grand to his name.
America is not a place, America is an idea—an idea that died along with my grandpa. And I’m sad to say I shot them both.
I lost my virginity in the back seat of a Buick. Not because I’m a romantic, but because my grandpa and grandma were in the front seats.
I once placed third in the Battle of the Fourth Places. There were only two other competitors, so I felt proud. My grandma and grandpa beat me, despite having been dead over five years.
I have to say that it was working with my grandpa, who grew up on a farm in Mountain Home, Idaho, that had the most influence. Witnessing his work ethic and hearing his stories gave me an appreciation for the farm's best lessons.
My grandpa would take me to the driving range and, I don't know, it didn't take me long to realize I'm a little different with golf. I have an eye for seeing things differently. Somehow I just see shots in my head.
Open yer mind to the world, kids. No point havin' yer windows open if yer don't pull back the curtains to let in the light!" - Grandpa's favourite saying to Kirsten and Jeremy. Quoted in The Hybrid and the Emeralds of Elisar
I have been described as the grandfather of climate change. In fact, I am just a grandfather and I do not want my grandchildren to say that grandpa understood what was happening but didn't make it clear.
I really learned a lot when I worked on my grandpa's film 'Twixt' and got to be with him start to finish and sit next to him every day. That was my film school.
