Sir Lancelot: [Sir Galahad the Chaste is being seduced by an entire castle full of young women] We were in the nick of time. You were in great peril. Sir Galahad: I don't think I was. Sir Lancelot: Yes, you were. You were in terrible peril. Sir Galah...
Knights of Camelot: [singing] We're knights of the Round Table, we dance whene'er we're able. We do routines and chorus scenes with footwork impec-cable, We dine well here in Camelot, we eat ham and jam and Spam a lot. / We're knights of the Round Ta...
Mushu: [stuffing breakfast into Mulan's mouth] No time to talk. Now remember, it's your first day of trainin', so listen to your teacher and no fightin', play nice with the other kids, unless, of course, one of the other kids wanna fight, then you ha...
Kate Grant: [looking at graves] There's Woody's little sister, Rose. She was only nineteen when she was killed in a car wreck near Wausa. What a whore! David Grant: Mom! Kate Grant: Nah, I liked Rose, but my God, she was a slut. David Grant: C'mon......
Mechanic 2: Ain't never seen anyone so shit-all stupid as you driving off that road. You musta got manure for your brains. Clark: Yeah, well, I'm from out of town. So, what's the bill? Come on, come on, how much? Mechanic 1: How much you got? Clark: ...
Peter Gibbons: It's not just about me and my dream of doing nothing. It's about all of us. I don't know what happened to me at that hypnotherapist and, I don't know, maybe it was just shock and it's wearing off now, but when I saw that fat man keel o...
[Peter is wearing shorts, sandals and a paisley shirt, with his feet up on his desk, munching chips and playing tetris on his computer] Bill Lumbergh: So, Peter, what's happening? Aahh, now, are you going to go ahead and have those TPS reports for us...
Westley: Who are you? Are we enemies? Why am I on this wall? Where is Buttercup? Inigo Montoya: Let me explain. [pause] Inigo Montoya: No, there is too much. Let me sum up. Buttercup is marry Humperdinck in little less than half an hour. So all we ha...
Sol Robeson: Have you met Archimedes? The one with the black spots, you see? You remember Archimedes of Syracuse, eh? The king asks Archimedes to determine if a present he's received is actually solid gold. Unsolved problem at the time. It tortures t...
Dutch: [Dutch approaches and grabs the shoulders of the prisoner who has spoken nothing but Spanish since her capture] Yesterday, what did you see? Dillon: You're wasting your time. Dutch: [to Anna] No more games. Anna: I don't know what it was. It.....
Charles Van Doren: They gave me the answers. Mark Van Doren: They gave you the answers... they gave YOU the answers? Charles Van Doren: Well, no... no, at first they'd ask me questions they already knew I knew the answers to. We ran through those, an...
Cornwall Cousins: Charles, is Jack Barry single? Charles Van Doren: I think so. Cornwall Cousins: My roommate has a huge crush on him, she wants you to introduce her. Cornwall Cousins: What's Dave Garroway like? Charles Van Doren: Cheap. Cornwall Aun...
Charlie: Hey Raymond, remember today when the doctor was asking you those questions? How'd you know the answers? Raymond: [while brushing his teeth at the same time, Charlie can't make out what he said] I see it. Charlie: What? Stop that for a second...
Anton Ego: [running his finger through leftover sauce and licking it] I can't remember the last time I asked to give my compliments to the chef. And now I find myself in the extraordinary position of having my waiter *be* the chef! Linguini: Thanks, ...
[Three seperate situations happening at the same time] Coach Boone: [Talking to official] Ref! He's lining up offsides! Look, he's *lining* up offsides! Official: [ignoring Coach Boone] Coach Ed Henry: [talking to player] Twins right, 99 Z. Go! Coach...
Sefton: I told you boys I'm no escape artist. For the first time, I like the odds, because now I got me a decoy. Hoffy: What's the decoy? Sefton: Price. When I go, I want you to give me five minutes - exactly five minutes - to get Dunbar out of that ...
General Jack D. Ripper: Mandrake, do you recall what Clemenceau once said about war? Group Capt. Lionel Mandrake: No, I don't think I do, sir, no. General Jack D. Ripper: He said war was too important to be left to the generals. When he said that, 50...
[Picard puts his hand on the Phoenix] Captain Jean-Luc Picard: It's a boyhood fantasy... I must have seen this ship hundreds of times in the Smithsonian but I was never able to touch it. Lieutenant Commander Data: Sir, does tactile contact alter your...
Donkey: Shrek! Hold up, Shrek! You got to wait for the line! Shrek: [about to burst into the cathedral] What are you talking about? Donkey: The line, the line you gotta wait for: the priest's gonna say "Speak now or forever hold your piece", and you ...
Brick Top: Pull your tongue out of my arsehole, Gary. Dogs do that. You're not a dog, are ya Gary? Gary: No, no I'm not. Brick Top: But you do have all the characteristics of a dog, Gary. All except loyalty. [Errol zaps Gary] Turkish: [Voice over] It...
Pat Sr.: Let me tell you, I know you don't want to listen to your father, I didn't listen to mine, and I am telling you you gotta pay attention this time. When life reaches out at a moment like this it's a sin if you don't reach back, I'm telling you...