I played a lot of tough clubs in my time. Once a guy in one of those clubs wanted to bet me $10 that I was dead. I was afraid to bet.
Hey, look at this guy Kenny G. with his thing, walking up and down the aisles of the concert hall and running off the stage and playing the same time. It's old hat!
Everybody knows that I am one of the greatest fighters of all time and I would beat all those guys.
I can tell you Kristen Hager is one of my all time favorite people to work with ever and one of the greatest scene partners, and I'm such a lucky guy.
My wife gets asked all the time, 'Ugh, how can you be married to that guy?' She's like, 'Hey, he's not yelling and screaming at me!'
Jay: What kinda sick fuck gets turned on watching a guy fuck a donkey?
Scientist: That's a 2500 dollar globe! What are you guys doing?
Max: [after seeing the guy fall on his cab's roof] My man, you all right?
[Describing Kansas City family underboss Piscano] Nicky Santoro: This guy could fuck up a cup of coffee.
Frankie Taglialucci: This guy a friend of yours? Carlito: Yeah, he's a friend of mine. Frankie Taglialucci: He's a fucking cockroach.
Lefty: A wise guy's always right; even when he's wrong, he's right.
Harry Block: I'm a guy who can't function well in life but can in art.
Edith: When we got adopted by a bald guy, I thought this would be more like Annie.
Gloria: Don't you guys miss having girls around here? Meeks, Pitts: Yeah.
Mike Dixon: If you want to fuck with somebody, you do it to their face! You hear me, tough guy?
Mary: A pizza? Who said you guys could order a pizza?
[after knocking a fan into a bathtub to electrocute a bad guy] James Bond: Shocking! Positively shocking!
Hiccup: [about the dragons] Everything we know about you guys is wrong.
Coach Norman Dale: I love you guys.
Mrs. Pell: You marry the first guy that makes you laugh.
Eddie Dane: You dumpin' Leo for the guy who put a bullet in your brother?
